


Fighting Isn't Enough

by Redlightsdistrict



Series: The Art of War [2]
Category: Love Island (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Bipolar Disorder, Codependency, Depression, Drama, F/M, Light BDSM, Obsessive Behavior, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-31
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:08:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 67,326
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24031060
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Redlightsdistrict/pseuds/Redlightsdistrict
Summary: You can't win without fighting - this much Bobby’d learned from spending six weeks on Love Island, fighting for the only thing that truly mattered.Sometimes, fighting isn’t enough - this lesson Kat’s only bound to learn.♥️ ON BREAK ♥️
Relationships: Bobby/Main Character (Love Island), Lucas/Main Character (Love Island)
Series: The Art of War [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1727500
Comments: 226
Kudos: 151





	1. Flux.

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to Part 2 of me torturing you with angst, drama and mixed feels 😆
> 
> If you’re new to this story, you can either start with 53 chapters of in-villa angst of You Can’t Win https://archiveofourown.org/works/22826890/chapters/54554908
> 
> or, you can read this one as a stand-alone, I think it works either way💋 
> 
> Kat and Bobby won Love Island despite all the drama and obstacles they’ve endured. But now they have to face the biggest challenge of all: the real world that seems to be against them.
> 
> 🍂 Find me:  
> Reddit: Redlightsdistrict  
> Insta: booksandreveries  
> Discord: Kat/redlightsdistrict#0642
> 
> 🍂 Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=GKiFIBp5RX6Z3_EwR_iCCA

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “...You can do what you want for now  
> I'll trust you with my life hun  
> You can do what you want now  
> Cause I trust you, yeah I trust you...”
> 
> [Electricity - Flora Cash]

  
“Was it hard?” Doctor Lang raised an eyebrow at her, as Kat stopped talking, frowning.

She sat up straight on the couch, not willing to continue this conversation. Her personal phone beeped, and she grabbed it immediately.

“I’ve got to go,” She looked up at the man across the coffee table from her. “Bobby’s flight is in an hour and a half.”

“We’re not finished, miss Rhodes,” Therapist looked deeply into her eyes. “I strongly advise you to stay here.”

Kat grabbed her purse, ready to skip off at any moment. She hated this fucking office, hated this man, hated that she had to spend her time talking about her feelings with someone who knew shit about her. She hated that instead of spending this time with Bobby, she got stuck here. She just hated everything, and there was nothing she could do about it.

“I appreciate your concern, Doctor Lang, but I don’t see a problem. Me and Bobby are a couple, it’d be unhealthy if we didn’t have sex, wouldn’t it?”

_This is ridiculous, why am I here?_

She and Bobby walked out of the Villa three weeks ago, hand in hand, with fifty grand debit card in Bobby’s pocket and a full bag of issues – but sex wasn’t one of them. If anything, sex was the only thing that kept her afloat these past three weeks. Press-conferences, and brand deals, and fan meet and greets, they got caught into a shitstorm, barely talking to each other during the day, they only had one another in the night, when they got back from yet another PR event to her London flat.

In Bobby’s arms was the only safe place, and now this headshrinker tells her that she has a sex addiction?

Kat huffed.

“Miss Rhodes, please, I didn’t say that the sex is unhealthy, I’m only saying that you’re using it as a coping mechanism, and you should find another way to release the tension. Something more demiurgic.” Lang caught her gaze and sighed. “At least, come in for a session tomorrow.”

“I'll try to,” She nodded hastily and jumped to her feet. “Thank you.”

She left the office and rushed down the stairs, not willing to spend time waiting for the elevator.

Doctor Lang was a psychotherapist show producers hired to work with the five final couples after the show has ended – to help them adjust. Lang, along with a group of PR people, was supposed to make sure that the sudden fame doesn't break them. Kat genuinely hated this guy, and she wanted to get back to her old doctor, but this was also part of the contract - a month of therapy. She had to talk to Doctor Lang three times a week, usually over the phone, but when she was in London, he wanted to see her in person, because he was "concerned about her the most."

“I dunno why you hate him so much,” Gary once told her. “He’s a nice man, he really helped me.”

Most of their friends shared Gary’s opinion, so she had to keep hers to herself. The only person who wasn’t fascinated by the doctor was Lucas, who hated therapy with all of his heart and was always up for some trash talk about Doctor Lang. Bobby didn’t have time to care about therapy - between the press events and the bakery opening scheduled for next month, he barely had time to eat. And when he wasn't at the bakery, cooking or yelling at his manager, he was with Kat, trying to fuck some life into her, so she doesn't slip away into her darkness completely. 

She knew depression when she saw one. And hers was in full swing.

Some days it took her hours to just drag herself out of the bed – and some days, she was too agitated and couldn’t sleep at all. Her mind was racing constantly, and she dreaded the moment when mania switches to absolute slumber.

Because of this, she had to make a decision to take a year off school and hospital, and besides Love Island stuff she had nothing to do. Suddenly, all of her friends were far away and even though they met each other often, they now all had their own lives, and she… She didn’t. She had nothing, just this hollow void inside of her chest that hurt all the time.

Kat hailed for a cab, looking down at her personal phone as the messages appeared on the screen. She had to mute almost all notifications, otherwise, the constant buzzing would drive her mad, and keep a separate phone for social media and press contacts to somehow separate herself from Kat, Love Island 2019 winner. Technically, Bobby was the winner, but no one cared since she was the one with all the drama.

The only bright side to this was that her family was now bombarded with cheap press asking for comments and knowing that they hated her as much as she hated them made this mess just a little more bearable.

“Oh, you look like that girl from the show,” The cab driver stared at her.

“I will look like a cab driver murderer if you don’t drive,” Kat promised, focusing her attention on the phone.

Lottie texted that she and Priya have found a couple of flats in London for Lottie to check out and will be in town next week, and she asked if they could crash at her place.

 **Sure, let’s have a slumber party.** She hit ‘send’, hoping that Bobby wouldn’t mind having two annoyingly loud guests so soon after he moved in with her. They already had so much on their plates, but at least, after this weekend, they’ll be officially living together. 

The cab stopped before the airport main entrance, and Kat jumped out of the car. It was unusually hot, and her conservative beige silk dress with long sleeves and high neck was clinging to her overheated body mercilessly. She texted Bobby as she walked inside, hiding from the bright sun. 

**I’m here**.

**Check-in line.**

Redhead made her way to the check-in line, spotting Bobby. He said something to the girl at one of the counters, and she burst into laughter. As if he felt Kat's stare, Bobby looked around. His eyes lit up as he soaked in the sight of her, and without a word, he grabbed his passport and ticket and walked over to his girlfriend.

“Hey,” He pulled her in, kissing deeply on the mouth.

Bobby’s hands slid up her body, sending shivers down Kat’s spine. She parted her lips, letting his tongue roam her mouth. He tasted like icing and cinnamon, he must’ve come here straight from the bakery.

A familiar warm wave washed over her body, compelling her to press harder into Bobby’s body, slipping her hands into his back pockets.

“I’ll miss you so much,” Bobby whispered, dragging his lips up to her ear.

_I miss you already._

Kat looked around, catching glances.

“How much time before your flight?” She breathed out, as he nibbled on her earlobe.

“About… half an hour,” His hot breath ghosted over the sensitive skin just behind her ear. His hands caressed her back through the silk fabric, and it wasn't nearly enough, she really needed to feel him, all of him.

“So… plenty,” Kat caught Bobby’s eyes.

He studied her face for a second and nodded.

“Yeah, plenty.”

She hated this, hated how much she needed him, but she loved how much he needed her. Fuck, she hated that she loved needing him so much.

“Good thing they’re all so progressive,” Kat pushed the door with a ‘gender-neutral’ sign on it, pulling Bobby in hastily. He locked the door behind them with one hand, his other already pulling his girlfriend closer in, tugging at the neck of her dress to expose more skin.

“I want you so much,” His ragged breath burned on her skin as Bobby pushed her against the sink countertop and her fingers worked through the buttons of his shirt hurriedly.

She needed to feel his skin under her fingertips, needed to know that he’s right there, with her. Most of the time, she was so scared and confused, and barely functioning – but not when he was near, with him, she could go through whatever life was about to throw in her face. Bobby’s mouth crushed against her lips, sucking on her tongue, grazing her lips with his teeth, biting, and licking. He pushed her up so she was seated on the countertop, her legs wrapped around his hips, ankles crossed. 

Urgently, Bobby's hand slipped under her dress, and she smirked at his stunned look: she wasn’t wearing underwear and she was so fucking wet with her desire for him.

“Fuck,” He groaned, slipping two of his fingers inside of her, making her back arch into him.

He moaned into her mouth, she was so hot, and tight, and perfect around his fingers, and his cock twitched at the thought that it will be inside of her, feeling her dripping, for him, wanting him, needing him as much as he needed her.

Her eyes lidded, and she sunk her teeth into his shoulder to keep quiet, but muffled moans still left her mouth involuntarily. Just for this moment, she didn’t have to feel anything but Bobby’s taut muscles under her hands, and his soft skin in between her teeth, and his perfect fingers inside of her. Bobby was pumping his fingers in and out of her, his mouth traveling across her face and down her neck.

“I hate this dress,” He growled, sucking her skin along with the soft fabric into his mouth.

“I’ll get rid of it,” Kat moaned, digging her nails deeper in his back before moving her hands to the front of his waistband.

Her hands trembled with yearning when she unbuckled his belt and unzipped his jeans, yanking it down along with his boxers, until it lied in a puddle around his ankles.

“Please,” She curled her fingers around his hard flesh, stroking him demandingly.

“Please what, Kat?”

She swallowed hard, catching his eyes for a second.

She said these words to Lucas when she walked on him in a bathroom and he’s been begging her to kiss him, and hearing Bobby say these words back to her was… Somehow, it turned the dial from ‘please fuck me’ to ‘if you don’t fuck me, I’ll die right here’, and it wasn’t something she was willing to think about.

With their eyes locked, she pushed her hips forward, taking him in one fast motion, making them both gasp.

“Fuck, Kat…”

She was fierce, and passionate, and crazy, and sometimes, she scared him – it scared him how far he was willing to go for her.

His thrusts were deep and erratic, and almost painful for both of them, and she pushed herself into him as hard as she could, even though her back constantly hit the wall behind her - she just needed to consume him, to make him hers, again, and again, and again.

Bobby’s hands wrapped around her, protecting her from hitting the wall, and his mouth found her lips in a messy, painful kiss, as the coil in her stomach was winding. She curled her fingers around his throat, making him whimper, her other hand clenched at the countertop to give her more stability as she pushed herself onto him even harder, almost ready to explode.

“Come for me, Bobby,” She clenched her thighs tighter around his hips, drawing a loud, desperate whimper out of him. His eyes rolled back into his head, as his entire body shuddered with pleasure, and his fingers sunk into her back, holding on to her like she was the one thing that kept him afloat.

His pleasure was enough to send her over the edge, and a million lights exploded in her head. She bit hard on her wrist not to cry, arching her body to his. If loving him like this was sick, she didn’t want to be healthy. He made her so complete, so full, he was the part of her that's been missing. 

Bobby pressed his forehead against hers, panting.

“I don’t know how I’ve survived these years without you,” He whispered. “I’ll die if you ever leave me.”

With her vision still blurred, Kat wrapped him into her arms, stroking his back soothingly, until he recomposed himself enough to look at his watch.

“Shit,” Bobby kissed her lips gently. “I’ve got to go.”

“You look positively fucked,” She caught his eyes in reflection, a smirk stretched across her face.

Bobby chuckled and helped her to her feet. Kat reached for his shirt and buttoned it for him, while he cleaned them both with paper towels.

“Good,” He nodded. “I want everyone to know.” He kissed her deeply before they left the bathroom, unnoticed.

“I’ll text you when we land,” Bobby stroked his thumb gently across Kat’s cheekbone. “Johno will pick me up at the airport, so I won’t probably get to my place tonight, I’m sure he and other lads would want to hang out.”

Bobby looked a bit apologetic: Kat and Johno weren’t exactly best mates as it turned out.

“You have fun,” She kissed him on a cheek meaningfully.

“I love you too, Red.”

Bobby hustled to his gate, and Kat watched him until he disappeared behind the border control. She flopped on one of the seats, stretching her legs. She had absolutely nothing to do unless she was willing to discuss writing a book about her time in the Villa with one of three publishers who’d approached her.

Her personal phone buzzed.

**I’ve heard that Bobby’s out of town this weekend?**

Lucas was typing another message when she replied.

**Someone’s got a great hearing.**

Lucas replied with smiley faces.

**Wanna hang out?**

Kat bit down on her lip, sending a text to Bobby.

**Did you tell Lucas that you’re leaving?**

Her phone buzzed immediately.

**When the cat’s away, the mice will play.**

She chuckled.

**I thought I was the cat?**

**I thought you like to switch?**

Kat felt her cheeks flush red.

**Have a nice flight, you horny fuck.**

Kat’s eyes widened as she looked down at the screen again.

**NSFW!**

She almost kicked herself.

**It was meant for Bobby… are you with a patient?**

**Yeah, but almost done. Come over.**

Kat looked at the time: Just about six o’clock.

**But we’re going dancing.**

**Yes, Your Majesty.**

She called the car service and put the earphones in, turning the music volume to maximum. Leaving the Villa, she was scared that she’ll lose her friends to their lives like it happened a dozen times before, and she thanked the Universe every fucking day her fears haven’t come true, and _he_ was still her friend…

When the car arrived, Kat asked the driver to close the window between the driver’s and passenger’s compartments and finally let herself relax. She kicked off her flats, stretching legs on the seat and opened the sunroof, tilting her head up, and closed her eyes, letting the cool breeze graze her face as she slowly drifted to sleep.

“Miss,” Driver’s voice woke her up.

They were already right before the building where Lucas rented his office, and she sent him a text and stretched with her whole body. She leaned over to grab a bottle of champagne and popped the cork when the car door opened, and she saw Lucas' smiling face.

“Fancy,” Lucas climbed inside.

“Can we just drive around the town for now please?” Kat asked the driver.

“Of course, miss.”

When they were cut off the driver, Lucas pulled her into a massive hug, wrapping his arms tightly around her. His familiar scent filled the space around them, sinking into her lungs, and her body slowly relaxed against his.

“I’ve missed you,” She whispered softly. “Two weeks is too fucking long.”

His lips grazed her cheekbone before Lucas pulled slightly away to look at his best friend.

“I know, I had to skip the last conference, one of my patients got a nasty strain in his leg.” He frowned. "I'm just honestly ready to get back to my routine. And I want us to get into our little... visiting schedule."

They both chuckled, and Lucas stroked her back gently, resting his chin on top of the girl’s head. His heartbeat was steady and calming, and Kat lost herself counting the beats for a long moment. Lucas was the only person except for Bobby who gave her some semblance of peacefulness and comfort.

A few minutes pass before she pulled away slightly and grabbed two flutes to fill with champagne. They clinked glasses when Kat’s personal phone beeped.

“It’s Bobby,” She looked down at the screen. “His plane’s landed, and he and Johno are heading to their favorite pub… Car selfie?”

She leaned closer to Lucas and smiled into the camera.

“Perfect,” She hit ‘send’. “How come you always look like you came straight from a photoshoot?’ She asked looking at their photo. Her hair was still messy, and her dress looked like it's never seen a steamer. 

“It’s a gift, kitten,” Lucas smirked, looking her up and down. “I take it was a… _passionate_ goodbye, wasn’t it?”

Kat felt her cheeks flush red with embarrassment.

“Don’t mind me,” Lucas chuckled. “We’ve all lived in the same house with you.”

“Have you… are you… Ugh, have you watched it back?”

The first week after finale none of them had time to really dive into the show, but now, when most of the press events were done with, most of the Islanders spent nights watching back the show and texting each other. Kat stopped reading some of the group chats because she and Bobby haven't even started, and she didn't want to get herself all worked up prematurely. 

“Just a couple of fragments... didn’t have much time.”

“Yeah, we didn’t have time for that, too… Also, I feel like it’s gonna be weird, watching myself cracking on with other people, with Bobby sitting next to me.”

“Like when you watch a movie with your parents and it's all good until the characters are suddenly fucking?"

Kat snorted.

“Wow, Doctor Koh, such a bright metaphor,” She shoved him playfully on a shoulder. “But yeah, precisely.”

Lucas’ phone beeped.

**Thanks for keeping her company. She isn’t well these days, I’m glad she’s with a friend.**

“So, Bobby’s moving in with you?” Lucas glanced at his phone, bottomed down his glass, and reached for the bottle to pour some more.

“Yeah, he went to Glasgow to make sure the movers don’t screw up his cooking stuff and to sign up some papers for his apart… flat.”

“Cooking stuff?” Lucas raised an eyebrow.

“I dunno, tins and mixers, and stuff.”

“You’re horrible,” He rolled eyes at her. “Why didn’t you go there with him?”

That was a very good question. Being apart hurt both of them, but she didn’t offer to come with him, and Bobby never asked her to.

“I’ve been to Glasgow on our first week out of the Villa, I’ve seen it all.”

_More likely, I’ve seen them all._

She was horrible at sharing Bobby’s attention, she figured that back in the Villa when she literally was jealous of him spending time with the others. She poured it out on him the night of the Ministry of Sound party and then hated herself. But it didn’t change the fact that she just couldn’t stand him spending time with someone else while she’s in the same room. So it was easier for her not to be in the same room, and let Bobby spend time with whoever he wants.

And also, she and his best friend didn’t hit it off right. That was a huge part of the reason she didn’t ask to go with Bobby.

“Kat,” Lucas’ voice was soft and quiet. “You can tell me, you know?”

“It’s nothing new,” She shrugged. “His friends aren’t exactly my fans, which isn’t that weird, considering that eighty percent of his friends are the girls he’d friend-zoned.”

She couldn’t hold back a sarcastic sneer, but Lucas knew her all too well.

“So, it didn’t get better with that Johno guy?”

“Nope,” She bottomed her glass and poured some more. “When we had those texts from family and friends, I lied to Bobby that I had a good chat with them. He was so happy when we went to meet Johno and the others, and… well, he was in for a surprise.”

Kat frowned, trying to push the memories aside.

“Hey, let’s not spend the night moping around. You’ve promised me dancing.”

The driver stopped the limo in front of the club, and Lucas helped Kat out of the car.

“You’re wearing flats?” His eyes went wide. “Thank god you’re cute and famous.”

He grabbed her by the hand and walked past the line.

“Hey,” Lucas nodded to the bouncer. “This is my friend, Kat.”

“Oh, I know you!” Bouncer grinned. “Still can’t believe you dumped this one for that Scottish boy.”

“Thanks, Max,” Lucas grimaced and led Kat inside.

“You know him?”

“It’s Oxford, Kat,” Lucas chuckled. “This is the only somewhat decent place, course I know him.”

Loud music and flickering lights blinded and deafened them for a moment.

“Bar?!” Lucas yelled and she nodded, following him through the crowd. “Three tequila shots for each.” He pecked the girl behind the bar on a cheek.

Kat raised an eyebrow at him but said nothing. Music started sinking through her skin, filling her body with liquid fire.

“Kassam would love this place,” She noted.

“Who?”

“Casa Amor guy... Lottie brought him back, remember?”

“The one with a crush on you?” Lucas leaned over to whisper straight into her ear and passed her a shot glass. 

Kat giggled and downed the drink.

“This is good stuff,” She noted.

The second portion made her body finally relax a little. It felt like she’s been holding her breath this entire time and finally, she could breathe out. DJ changed the song, and a sultry, slow beat filled up space around them. Kat grabbed the third glass and tugged on Lucas’ hand.

“Dance with me.”

“Yes, sir!” He chuckled and put the empty glass down, before following her to the center of the dancefloor. She moved slowly, the silk fabric of her dress was flowing down her body, hugging her curves. 

She moved past other dancers, stumbling into hot bodies before she finally stopped and looked up at Lucas with her glistering darkened eyes. She looked like a mess, with her tangled curls and wrinkled dress and twisted mind.

 _“...I don't wanna fall apart_ _  
I wanna be alive with you..."_

She moved lazily, tracing one hand up her thigh, following the curves of her body. Her eyes lidded, and Kat shut them close, enjoying blue and red lights playing under the eyelids. Her fingers slipped through her hair, tangling the curls even more, and then moved across her face, fingers brushing against the lips ever so slightly. She still had her drink in hand, but she wanted to feel Lucas’ warm body pressed into hers as they dance together, again. When she opened her eyes, she caught his gaze, locked on her face, and slowly pulled him closer, guiding his hand until it came to rest on her waist. Lucas wrapped his arm tighter around her, moving hips in perfect sync with hers.

Kat slipped her hand up his arm, raking fingers hard against the taut muscles. She bottomed her drink and finally wrapped another arm around his shoulders, pulling their bodies even closer. His hot, firm chest pressed against her, and she finally felt safe. Without Bobby, she was lost, and Lucas was the only straw that could keep her above the water surface now. 

Her hand clenched at his gelled hair.

_“You’re lucky I’m not your girlfriend. Otherwise, you wouldn’t be allowed to use it.”_

She slowly spun around, now her back pressed against Lucas’ chest, and his hands glided up her thighs, pulling the dress up just a little, pressing firmly, outlining the curves of her body. For a moment, his hands rested on her hips, swaying both of their bodies to the beat of the music, and then traveled up her sides. Kat tilted her head back, resting it against Lucas’s shoulder, looking up at him with her heavy-lidded glossy eyes. He found her wrists and guided her arms gently up, caressing her skin through the silk fabric.

_“I wanna be alive with you  
I'm running - I'm running  
I'm running out of time…” _

She coiled his neck with her arms, arching her back slightly, and the dark-haired man leaned even closer in, wrapping his arms around her waist. Their bodies entwined, as they moved slowly to the music, swaying softly from side to side, and Kat’s hair brushed against his neck, and Lucas’ hot breath sent shivers down her spine.

Finally, she felt something else than this all-consuming numbness with someone else than Bobby. Kat loved Lottie and Priya, and Gary, and Rahim, and Chels… She loved them all, but they couldn’t really make her _feel_. She loved them and she cared about them, but she couldn’t tell them how fucked up she was. She couldn’t let them see how deeply not okay she was. She couldn’t let them in close enough to see this dark, sticky cloud of fog that lived inside of her, and that was fighting to consume her. They needed to be protected from the monster that she was, and Lucas… he saw her for who she was, and he wasn’t afraid of it, despite any basic survival instincts.

He was as much of a fuck-up as she was.

“I want another drink.”

He nodded and they walked back to the bar. Lucas signed the bartender to bring one of the bottles and two shot glasses. 

_“…_ _I’m your light..._  
 _Love until you burst_  
 _Love is not for real…_ ”

Kat threw back two drinks and leaned forward resting her free hand on Lucas' waist. 

“They play the saddest shit here.” She fiddled the glass in her fingers. “I like it. It suits me. And you. It suits us.”

They drank in silence, leaning against each other, moving to the beat slowly. His arm draped around her shoulders, and he played with her hair, twisting it around his finger mindlessly.

“Why are we such sad fucks, Luc?” Kat asked quietly, almost hoping he won’t hear.

“I prefer to call it ‘allure of the darkness’,” Lucas chuckled, squeezing her shoulder firmly before pulling her in. “Chin up, kitten, we’re not dead yet.”

He placed a soft kiss at the side of her head, and suddenly a bright camera flash blinded them both.

“What the fuck?!” Lucas growled. “What the fuck was that?”

Kat pointed at the security guy, escorting the photographer out of the club.

“Sorry, Lucas,” The bartender bent over the bar. “Everything’s on us.”

He grimaced, clearly unimpressed, but Kat stroked his hand soothingly.

“I don’t want you to get in trouble when this photo sees the light of the day,” He frowned a little.

“It wasn’t that much of a photo,” Kat shrugged. “Bobby wouldn’t think of it more than it really is, you know that.”

She had to bite her tongue not to ask about Lottie. Both he and the blonde avoided questions about their current relationship status expertly, so Kat just assumed that they’ve decided to stay friends… But she never asked directly, neither of them. Even back in the Villa, everyone always _assumed_ that they're just friends, but Kat wasn't sure anyone ever asked them if that's the case. 

Kat looked at Lucas intently: he looked more rattled than she’d expected, and her heart sunk. She hated seeing him unhappy, she just couldn't handle this deep sadness on the bottoms of his darl-brown eyes. His body slumped forward as if he was a party balloon suddenly drawn out of all air. 

“Hey, do you wanna get out of here?”

He nodded wordlessly, and they got back into the car. Inside the club, Kat hadn't noticed it, but now there was no doubt - they both were drunk. Lucas blurted out his address and took a large gulp straight from the bottle he's been still carrying. 

_How could I not see it earlier? He’s going through something, and I haven’t even noticed._

He passed her the bottle, and she took a few large gulps, too. They spent the drive home in silence, drinking in turns. Lucas didn't look like he wanted to talk, and so they didn't. When the car stopped, Kat excused the driver and helped Lucas to get out of the car. He was positively drunk, and she remembered his own words that he can’t really drink. She wasn't sober herself, but Lucas was barely standing on his feet by the time they approached his house. He skipped the 'not sober' phase in a spun of minutes and now he was terribly drunk.

“Where’s your key?” Kat wrapped her arm around Lucas’s waist, guiding him towards his house.

“Back…”

“Back?”

“Pocket.”

He giggled, and Kat rolled her eyes, sliding her hand into the back pocket of his tight jeans. 

“Not… that… other.”

She checked the other pocket, but the keys weren’t there.

“I’ll find it,” Lucas tried sliding his fingers into his front pockets but missed. Twice.

“You’re really a horrible drunk,” Kat felt her legs tremble under his weight, and a poke of guilt made her heart sink. She should've noticed earlier, her friend was going through something and she should've taken care of him.

She searched his front pockets and finally fished out the keys.

“Come on, let’s get you into bed.”

Lucas lived in a one-story house with two bedrooms, and Kat helped him to get into his bed and covered him with blankets. It was weird, being in someone else's house for the first time and somehow know exactly where his bedroom was... as if it was _saturated_ with his energy. Or maybe, she was just drunk and imagined things... Kat shook her head, shrugging off those weird thoughts running through her mind. 

“Ugh, you’re…see…weet…sweetheart,” He chuckled, yawning.

“Yeah. I am,” She pulled off his shoes and left him to find the kitchen. When she returned from the kitchen with a bottle of water in hand, Lucas threw the blankets away and pointed to himself.

“Undress me,” He asked, slurring. “Hate sleep…sleeping in clothhsh.”

She slowly unbuttoned his shirt and took it off him, one arm at a time. Unzipping his pants, she mentally gave herself a kick for letting Lucas get this drunk.

_He’s your friend, you’re supposed to take care of him. And instead of doing so, you’ve just dumped your shit of a mood onto him. What kind of a friend does that?_

The dark cloud of fog returned into her chest, wrapping her heart tightly into its sticky, vile embrace. She’s got so caught up in her head that she hasn’t even noticed that he’s going through some dark times of his own.

“I’m so sorry, Luc,” She pressed a gentle kiss at the corner of his mouth. “So sorry for being such a shitty friend to you.”

He mumbled something in his sleep, and Kat left him, keeping the door to his room slightly open. She inspected his house until she found a walk-in closet and grabbed a pair of old pajama pants and a t-shirt to wear and went to the bathroom. After a quick shower, she’s changed into his clothes and looked at the notifications on her phone.

Bobby texted her while she’s been busy settling Lucas for the night. Too tired to think about been a humble guest, she got into the bed in the guest bedroom and hit the dial button. She needed to hear Bobby’s voice, if only for a quick minute.

He picked up after the second ring.

“Hey,” He whispered. “Sorry, Johno’s fast asleep and the walls here are, well, paper-thin.”

“I just wanted to hear your voice,” She whispered back. “Lucas’s sleeping, too. I got him drunk.”

Bobby giggled.

“Why am I not surprised?”

“Hey, not my fault he can’t drink,” Kat was glad it wasn’t a video call, and Bobby couldn’t see her cheeks color pink: of course, it was her fault. He only ordered tequila because he knew it's what she drinks...

“Where’d you go?”

“Apparently, the only posh night club in Oxford,” Kat chuckled. “He literally knows the bouncer and the bartender.”

“Don’t you know like at least five bartenders only in Soho?” Bobby’s innocent tone couldn’t trick her.

“Didn’t hear you complain free drinks,” She chuckled. “Did you go to that pub, the one we went to?”

“Yeah, it was pretty lame… after hanging out with you.”

His voice changed ever so slightly. He could just be referring to the night they went to Bobby and Johno's favorite pub, but she knew he was talking about their little bathroom goodbye scene.

“Really?” Kat’s voice went a little lower. “So, you like to… hang out with me?”

She closed her eyes, letting her body drift into a haze. Bobby’s soft, slightly raspy voice crawled under her skin, sinking into her veins, and melting her bones. She really loved his phone voice, as she could let her imagination run wild, imagining the way his lips move, and his eyes crinkle when he smiles, and his cheeks blush...

“I wished you were here tonight,” Bobby whispered. “It wasn’t fun, dancing without you.”

“Did you really dance?” She asked, somehow amused.

“I got bored half a song into it… I’ve missed watching you dance too much…" Bobby's voice stuttered a bit before he continued. "I’ve missed dancing with you… Holding you in my arms…”

Kat’s fingers slowly touched to her neck, nails brushing gently up and down her throat. 

“So… What’d you did if I was there?” She asked softly, tracing a line down to her collarbone.

Bobby’s breath became just a tad heavier as he responded.

“They’ve played this song… it made me think of you… how you move… how you approach me, and how your body moves in sync with the music… as if you’re floating above the ground… and how you slide your hands up your body, slowly…”

She’s heard a tiny gasp that went straight into her core, and her stomach tightened into a knot with desire. Kat’s hand moved slowly down her chest, fingers brushing her breasts lightly through the fabric of Lucas’ shirt. Her eyes were still shut close, and she imagined baker's face, the way his amber eyes go a shade deeper, and his lips part to suck in the air.

“If I was there… what’d you do?”

She’d never had phone sex in her life, she felt weird even talking during sex, all the dirty chat wasn’t her thing but… But Bobby’s slightly slurring voice and his slightly uneven breath made her skin tingle and her heart flutter and her body ache for relief. 

“I’d put my arm around you, holding you tight… And I’d let my other hand travel up your thigh… pulling at your dress slightly… and I’d let my knee slip between your legs… so… so you could press yourself against it and… you’d tell me you’re not wearing underwear… And I’d pushed you into me until there’s no space between us…”

Bobby’s breath stuttered, letting a soft moan out of his mouth. Kat’s hand slipped under the waistband of the pants she was wearing, and her legs opened automatically as her fingers slid in between her slippery folds, drawing a soft sigh out of her lips, too. She could imagine his face so vividly right now, lips slightly parted, cheeks bright pink with arousal and a bit of abashment, as she knew this phone sex thing wasn’t something he’d tried before neither. 

“I hate it when there’s space between us,” She whispered softly.

She wished they could mold into one, she wanted him inside of her forever.

“I want to kiss you so badly right now,” Bobby admitted with his breaking voice. “I’d grab your face into my hands and kiss you, kiss you until we mold into one… I’d kiss your lips and down to your neck… and your shoulders… and that tiny birthmark on the side of your left breast…”

“While still on the dancefloor?” She chuckled softly, and Bobby giggled, too.

“What can I say… you drive me wild, Kat.”

His voice was dark and low, and viscous like honey, and she had no doubt that he wanted her as badly as she wanted him right now.

“And I’d slid one of my hands in between the skin of your stomach and the waistband of your jeans,” She took over, breathing deeply as her fingers traced circles on her inner thigh. “And my finger would trace all the way from one hipbone to another… just like I usually do it with my tongue…”

She’s heard a quiet whimper, and her hips jerked upwards involuntarily, searching for her hand. Slowly, she returned her fingers onto her clit, rubbing at it gently, imagining his perfect slender fingers doing it for her.

“God, I miss you,” Bobby moaned brokenly, and she sees clearly the way his eyes sparkle with wild desire. “I need you so much, Kat… I need your hands… mouth… all of you…”

“I’m just right here,” Her voice is strained and her mouth dry. “My mouth is wrapped around your cock, sucking it deeply into my throat… can you feel me?”

Bobby’s moan filled her ears, sending thrills of electricity all the way to her center, and she slipped a finger inside of her. He's been gone for a few hours, and she missed him so much it hurt. 

“I miss your fingers, Bobby… I miss them inside of me…”

Her breath stuttered as the waves of pleasure started spreading through her body.

“Please… I need… can I see you?” Bobby’s ragged breaths made her insides turn into liquid fire, as her hand found the camera button on the screen, turning on the video.

Bobby’s face was barely lit with the dim light coming from across the room, but she could see his blown pupils and his chest rising and falling heavily.

“God, I’ve missed you,” He whispered, taking in the sight of her parted lips and wild curls and almost black in this lighting eyes.

“I want to see you come,” He moaned, moving his hand faster. “Please, Kat, let me see you…”

She started pumping her fingers faster, in and out, closing her eyes for a second.

“Do it for me…”

Bobby’s muffled groan of pleasure made her snap her eyes open, sending her over the edge. Her entire body arched up, as her fingers worked her through the orgasm. She cried his name, and heard Bobby swearing, as he followed her the same moment. Her body was still caught in the aftershocks, but she kept her eyes locked on Bobby’s face, twisted with pleasure.

Watching him through the phone somehow made everything even more intense. Bobby’s finally managed to catch his breath and focused his eyes on the screen.

“Hey,” He smiled tentatively at her.

“Hey,” She smiled back, studying his face intently. “I’ve missed you tonight.”

“I’ve missed you so fucking much,” He breathed out. “Would you… ugh, just come over here. Please?”

“Can I bring Lucas with me?” The words slipped off her tongue before Kat could stop herself. “I think he’s going through something…”

“Yeah, sure,” Bobby beamed. “I’m… gonna clean myself,” She saw a blush coloring his cheeks. “Text me when you get the tickets, okay?”

“I will.”

Kat studied Bobby’s face for a long moment, soaking him in.

“Night, Bobby," She whispered softly.

“See you in a few hours, Kat.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A


	2. Eternally yours.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "...I used to be mad but now I know  
> Sometimes it's better to let someone go  
> It just hadn't hit me yet  
> The older I get..."
> 
> [Older - Sasha Sloan]

A loud sound jerked Bobby awake. He cracked his eyes open, listening into the morning silence interrupted only with quiet birdsong and rare cars driving by the open windows of Johno’s guest room. A few seconds later another loud sound echoed through the flat, shaking any residues of morning laziness off Bobby.

He looked around once his room, now just a guest bedroom, and sighed deeply: he’s going to miss this place. Not this room, but he’ll miss hanging out with Johno and other lads from the hospital kitchen, and he’ll miss Glasgow, and its chilly nights and slow pace.

Before Bobby could start dwelling, his phone buzzed with a text.

**We’re ready for the take-off. Or maybe, they offered us peanuts? I’ve no idea, I don’t understand a word they say. Lucas‘s playing translator but I have a feeling he’s just messing with me…**

Bobby sent a reply, smiling.

**I remember pacifically that you bragged about your… oral communication skills…**

Her reply came almost immediately, making him choke on air.

**Do you really want your girlfriend to use her oral communication skills on someone else, Rob?**

Bobby sent her a bunch of emojis and wishes for a safe flight and made his way to the kitchen.

“Mornin’,” He yawned, walking up to Johno who was busy making tea and toasts.

“Slept weel?” Johno asked, shifting a little to pat Bobby’s back. “A've made eggs 'n' toasts 'n' bacon.”

Bobby slid on the chair next to the kitchen island and filled his plate with scrambled eggs and strips of bacon.

“Thanks,” He mumbled through the food in his mouth, sending a smile to the older guy.

Johno was almost five years older than Bobby, and all these years he was this hybrid of a best friend, older brother, and dad for him, and even now he continued taking care of him. This large, always smiling guy was the heart of their company, and Bobby loved him dearly... Even though their relationship has changed ever since the show.

Bobby spotted a stack of newspapers and magazines sitting just a bit aside that wasn't there last night.

“Have you robbed a newspaper stand or something?”

He grabbed the one on top: Kat was looking at him from the cover, her hand resting on Lucas’ chest as his mouth was pressed into the side of her head.

“The ‘what if’ couple of Love Island 2019: can you see the sparks flying?” Bobby read, barely containing a giggle. “Wow, this photo must’ve been taken just last night, and it’s already on the cover.”

Johno’s dark hazel eyes studied him for a long moment.

“Howfur dae ye ken that?”

“She’s wearing the same dress she’s been wearing when I saw her at the airport,” Bobby replied, frowning a little. “And I know she went to Oxford right after,” He sighed and put away the magazine. “Are they all like that?”

Bobby nodded at the stack of press. He knew Johno didn’t approve of his relationship with Kat, and he knew his friend was only trying to protect him, but he didn’t need any protection. He was happy, for the first time since forever ago, before his parents have fallen out of love and his life turned into hell.

And he hated that his friends couldn’t see how happy Kat made him, every damn second of every fucking day. Her constant support and encouragement, her willingness to spend sleepless nights preparing for the bakery opening, her reassurance… her urgent touches and ravenous kisses… everything about her was perfect, and exactly what he needed.

“Tis an interesting tendency though, isnae it?” Johno replied, biting on his toast.

“They’ve seen each other twice since we left the Villa,” Bobby frowned, and a deep line appeared between his eyebrows. “Yesterday was the third. Most of these pics and articles are just speculations and plain bullshit.”

There was a lot of press about Kat and her ‘army of lovers’, and usually, it didn’t bother either of them – but right now, Bobby started feeling annoyance.

“You don’t know her,” He said firmly. “Just because you saw her on the telly, doesn’t mean you can judge her.”

“Hae ye watched it back?” Johno asked.

“No,” Bobby fiddled with his fork. “Look, I know, you’re just trying to protect me, but I don’t need you to. I love her, and it won’t change. So can you just be happy for me?”

“Ye dinnae speak Scots anymair,” Johno said suddenly, sipping on his tea.

Bobby shifted on his seat uncomfortably. Last night was fun because he got to see all of his mates, and they had such a good time together, just laughing and drinking. Some girls recognized him and it was both flattering and weird. It was nice to be the center of attention, especially, with Theo and Louis around, but also… it was strange how deeply bored those girls made him feel.

They were beautiful and sweet and laughed at his jokes, but they were… empty. Like beautiful vases with no flowers. And the more time he spent with them, the more he needed to be with Kat. Even one night away from her seemed endless.

They finished breakfast in uncomfortable silence.

The atmosphere around them was tensed all the way to Bobby’s flat, even though both of them pretended it wasn’t. Once they got to his place, baker headed towards the kitchen to pack and Johno stayed in the living room to pack books and old vinyl records that Bobby got from his grandfather.

Bobby was trying to fit his favorite mixer back in its package when his phone started vibrating in the back pocket of his jeans.

“Hey, Lo,” Bobby accepted the video call. “What’s up?”

Lottie looked at him suspiciously.

“Nothing much… you know, was just chilling, scrolling through my feed… you posted last night so I went on your page…”

Bobby took a tighter grip of the box.

“Lola, get to the point, I’m packing.”

“Have you seen the pics you’ve been tagged on last night?”

“No,” Bobby rolled his eyes. “Why would I, there are constantly new pics I’ve been tagged on.”

He finally managed to shove everything into the box and grabbed a roll of duct tape. He couldn’t care less about his socials, but right now it was the way to make sure his bakery gets as much attention as possible, so he had to post regularly. He thought it was well unfair that Kat only posted a picture of herself once a week and it would immediately get thousands of likes and hit the trending page.

Bobby shook his head trying to focus.

“Is that why you’re calling me?” He asked, moving across the kitchen to grab another box.

“No,” Lottie rolled her eyes. “I’ve been calling Kat for the last hour, but it goes straight into voice mail.”

“She’s on her way to Glasgow,” Bobby reported with a grin. “She and Lucas took an early flight.”

Lottie’s face suddenly darkened.

“Oh.”

“Oh?” Bobby stared at the screen, finally noticing that the blonde girl was clearly rattled. “What’s going on, Lotta?”

He sat down on one of the chairs and pressed his elbows against the table. Last time he saw Lottie was about a week ago when they did a meet and greet in Leeds. He was too caught up and tired to notice it back then, but now he remembered that she looked tired and confused, just like now.

Lottie didn’t respond.

“C’mon, just tell me, what’s wrong?”

“I-I can’t tell you… not before I tell Kat,” She grazed her lip between her teeth. “So, she and Lucas are both coming to Glasgow? Why?”

“Because I asked her to,” Bobby blushed a little at the memory of their last phone conversation. “And she was with Lucas last night and he seemed pretty low and she didn’t want to leave him alone.”

“He was low?”

Bobby remembered that both Lucas and Lottie avoided questions about the state of their relationship, but Bobby just always assumed it was only a friendship couple back in the Villa. So why is she upset that Lucas and Kat spend time together?

“I dunno, Kat only said that he’s upset about something. Why won’t you ask him yourself?”

Lottie’s mouth pursed into a narrow line.

“Okay, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” Bobby gave up. “But at least tell me if I can do anything to help.”

“Thanks, Bobs,” Lottie let out a long sigh and looked at something off the screen. “I really appreciate it. I don’t know if Kat told you yet but me and Priya will be in London next week.”

“Oh, are you staying with us?” Bobby grinned widely.

“Us?” Lottie arched her eyebrows slightly.

“Aye,” His smile grew even wider. “After this weekend, we’ll be officially living together.”

Lottie’s lips curled into a grin as she pumped her fist.

“I’m so excited for you guys!” She looked at him warmly. “And I can’t wait to see you both, I’ve missed you.”

“Likewise,” Bobby winked at the witch. “It’s actually kind of weird to sleep in a room with just one person.”

“You tell me. I still sometimes expect to wake up to someone’s morning make-out session.”

A notification popped up on his phone, and Bobby’s face lit up. He texted Kat with his address and looked back at Lottie.

“I know that look,” Blonde smiled warmly. “You’ll see Kat soon.”

He blushed a little at how easily she read him but nodded. Knowing that his girlfriend is on her way to his flat and that he’ll see her in less than an hour made his heart go faster, and he couldn’t fight off a huge smile stretched across his face.

“We’ll FaceTime you when she’s here.”

Lottie’s face suddenly colored red as she shook her head.

“It’s okay, I’ll talk to her when I see her next week,” She sighed. “I’ve gotta go now.”

Before Bobby could react, Lottie ended the call.

_Well, that was weird._

“She's comin' ower?” Johno’s voice almost startled Bobby. “Ah thought ye wanted tae spend th' weekend wi' th' laddies.”

Baker had nothing to reply to that. He really did say that this weekend was for him and his mates to have a proper lad’s time… But that was before he spent several hours lacking having Kat in the same space. No matter how much he loved his mates, he needed her to be complete, without her, he felt like a part of his body was missing.

“Look, I think it’ll be a good opportunity for you guys to get to know each other,” Bobby cringed eternally: he was still a peacemaker who wanted everyone to get along. He thought that being in the Villa has changed him for good, but he still needed to see everyone friendly. “I’m planning to spend my life with her,” He added quietly. “Nothing is going to change that.”

He had to stop himself before the next words slipped off his tongue: no one will ever change that. Not having the support of his mates wasn’t easy but… it didn’t matter.

As if he somehow read Bobby’s mind, Johno shook his head, rolling up the sleeves of his plaid shirt nervously. Bobby had never been dismissive of his opinions before, let alone, never did he tell his mates to back off.

A knock on the door distracted them both.

“It’s the movers!” Bobby frowned. “They weren’t supposed to arrive until two!”

“Ah will let thaim in, ye juist keep packing.”

Bobby opened the cabinets to see what else he might’ve forgotten to pack, and his mind started to wander. He thought about his life in London, how much has changed in the last three weeks. He wanted to open his own bakery for as long as he could remember, but he never thought it’ll happen so soon.

It was their fourth day out of the Villa. He and Kat only got back to her London flat and she left to see their therapist while Bobby was trying not to freak out as he explored a huge two-bedroom flat. He remembered Kat’s words on their first day in the Villa, that she’d seen better places, and now he had no doubt about that.

He felt so small in those high-ceiling rooms that he ended hanging out in the kitchen for almost two hours. Even though she didn’t cook, she had an amazing kitchen, bright and functional, and a little empty, and Bobby couldn’t wait for the moment he’ll stock it with pots and tins and some actual food.

And then, Kat called him and asked to meet her somewhere in Chelsea. When he climbed out of the cab, she was already waiting in front of a small building.

“Hey,” Bobby walked up to her, wrapping his girlfriend into his arms.

“Look,” She pointed at the sign.

“Commercial let.” Bobby raised his eyebrows.

“You said it yourself, you want to open a bakery. This used to be a little macaroon shop before. It’s a perfect location and it’s really cute,” She pointed at the façade. “And I think you should call the agent, like, now.”

And that was it: they’ve met the agent who happened to be on #teamkobby – at these words, Bobby cringed eternally – and the next morning he signed the papers. Kat turned out to be absolutely right: kitchen was fully set, space inside was lovely and barely needed any redecoration, and location was perfect.

He hired a manager, a very pro-active man just a few years older than himself, who was so opinionated Bobby’s head sometimes hurt – but they seemed to make a great team.

Bobby couldn’t believe how much – and how fast – his life had changed in just two months. Not only he’d met the life of his life but now he was suddenly about to fulfill his life-long dream of having a place where he could do whatever he wanted.

And it wouldn’t have happened if not for Kat.

Anyone who thought she was bad for him must’ve gone insane. She was so much more than he deserved, so much more than anything in this fucking world… she was everything. Just being close to her made him better, made him worthy. She was the touchstone of everything and everyone in his life now. She was the reason he woke up absolutely blissed every morning, knowing that he’d get to spend this day in the world she loves him.

Mindlessly, Bobby grabbed his phone and went on Instagram to see what Lottie’s been on about.

“Oh, shit,” He looked at himself, in a several dozens of pictures evidently made last night. In a few of them, he looked like he was having a great time. One of those pictures was posted by a gossip account with the description “I wonder what his Kitty-Kat thinks about that mice?” and a photo of him sitting at the table next to a girl whose hand was resting on his shoulder.

Bobby hand on heart didn’t remember the girl but it looked not much better than the front cover with Kat and Lucas.

_And it’s just as much bullshit._

He removed himself from that photo and went into the settings and switched auto-tagging off: now, no one will see pics he was tagged in until he approves.

Bobby could hear Johno’s loud laugh as he invited the movers in. He knew that his friend has a right to be a little salty: after all, he used to be his best friend, and now, he suddenly wasn’t. Bobby said it himself, many times: Kat wasn’t just the woman he loved, she was his best friend, above all. The only person he trusted enough to see past his ‘succulent’ façade, past his blushing cheeks and an undying need to keep everyone happy.

She was the only person who’d managed battle through his insecurities and make him feel important, worthy… beautiful. Not just physically attractive, but actually _beautiful_. She looked at him as if he was a magical creature, something so valuable she couldn’t believe belonged to her.

He was afraid it’d be hard for them to adjust, learn how to be together just the two of them, with no one to bounce off – but it turned out being alone with her was the only thing he needed. Whenever they got a chance, they rushed to each other, as if they’ve been starved for so long, they couldn’t just stop devouring one another.

Bobby’s face flushed red at the memory of last night: he’d never had phone sex in his life, he was way insecure for that, he always thought he’d say something stupid and fuck up… It turned out, he couldn’t fuck up with her. With her, everything he did was perfect. _He_ was perfect.

“Oy, Bob!” Johno’s voice snapped him out of his lazy haze. “Come 'ere!”

The next half an hour flew by in a blink of an eye. Most of his stuff was packed and ready to go, but it turned out he’d completely forgotten about the hidden cupboard.

A loud wolf-whistle nearly gave him a heart attack.

“Th' fek wis that?!” He peeked his head out of the cupboard to see Kat walking in.

She was wearing a pair of jean shorts and an oversized t-shirt tied into a knot just above her bellybutton. It slipped off her shoulder, exposing soft skin with a dark red spot – his mark.

Bobby’s heart skipped a few beats as he soaked her in. He did doubt that any ballgown could compete with this plain white t-shirt with London printed on the chest.

Johno rolled his eyes at the reaction but said nothing as Lucas appeared just behind her.

“Thanks, boys, I love me a good entrance,” Kat smiled charmingly but her eyes only saw Bobby. He just couldn’t believe that in the room full of people she saw only him, and he kept asking himself what had he done to deserve her.

“Hey, you,” He dropped the box from his hand and stepped forward, wrapping her into a tight embrace. “I’ve missed you so fucking much,” He mumbled into her hair.

Kat’s body relaxed in his arms, tension giving the way to a warm tingling sensation in the pit of her stomach.

Her fingers brushed his back lightly as her hands snaked under his t-shirt. He wanted to just sweep her off her feet and carry her to the closest horizontal surface and…

 _And you need to stop_.

He willed himself to pull back and smiled at Lucas.

“Hey,” Bobby looked between Lucas and Johno. “Johno, this is Lucas, Lucas, Johno.”

“Nice to meet you,” Lucas managed a little smile.

“We’re just finishing here,” Bobby reported.

“No worries,” Lucas turned his gaze to him. “Kat promised me mind-blowing bagels anyway.”

Redhead smirked making her way back to the older man.

“That was a direct quote,” She glanced at Bobby. “We’ll leave you both to it then,” She glanced at Johno. “It’s nice to see you again, Johno.”

Without waiting for him to reply, she grabbed Lucas by the hand and walked him outside. Bobby watched them through the window as they walked slowly down the street.

“You could’ve at least said ‘hey’, you know?” Baker noted.

“Ah nodded,” Johno shrugged. “Sorry if ah'ament tae excited aboot mah pal bein' played lik' a schuil laddie.”

“For fuck’s sake!” Bobby exploded. “Where’d you got it from?! Why on earth would she get stuck with me if she wanted someone else?! Haven’t you been paying attention? Everyone wants her! She could’ve picked literally any guy, fuck, if she wanted Lucas or Jared or Gary on anyone for that matter, why on earth would’ve she picked me?!”

Bobby’s loud voice made the movers exchange curious glances and pasty chef toned down a bit.

“She literally went against her family to be with me.”

“Ye'r daein' th' s’me. Ye'r gaun against yer mukkers 'n' fowk wha think she's nae guid fur ye.”

“But the difference is that her family actually does give a fuck about her!” Bobby snapped. “Las time I’ve spoken to my parents was two years ago, and ever since then, they haven’t bothered to even send a Happy B-day text. And now, they’re suddenly _concerned_?”

He was so done with this, this conversation was the last straw. For the first time, his life finally belonged to him. He was finally happy and successful and instead of being happy for him, his supposed best mate was salty and unwilling to at least get to know Kat before jumping to judgments.

“Ye ken what?” He asked, defeated. “Ah don’t wantae rammy. I’ve kent ye fur six years 'n' ye'v bin a guid pal.”

Bobby took a deep breath in and continued: “I want to remember you exactly that. I’ve asked you multiple times to respect my choice but I’m not going to let you talk shit about her. If you can’t respect me and her, I don’t think we should carry on with this friendship.”

Johno looked like he couldn’t believe what he’d just heard – and Bobby himself couldn’t believe he’d actually said those words. His heart was hammering out of his chest as he finished his little speech.

“Fine.”

Johno said nothing more as he moved past Bobby, making his way to the door. He hung back for a second at the doorway as if about to add something but shook his head and left without looking back.

Bobby groaned and slammed his back against the wall, hiding his face in his hands. He felt like he got punched in his chest and it kicked the air out of him. Losing a friend felt terrible, and he couldn’t believe that six years of friendship has brought them here, to this broken place.

Absentmindedly, he finished packing and looked around his once home. It was now empty and lonely, and he almost couldn’t believe he’d spent here four years of his life. It was so small and insignificant like he was himself… He felt sad as he locked the door for the last time and threw the key into the mailbox and slowly walked away without looking back.

This chapter of his life had come to its end, and there was no need to dwell on it.

Bobby’s phone buzzed.

**WHAT THE FEK BOBBY**

Theo’s text popped up on the screen.

_Took them all of five minutes._

He shoved his phone into the back pocket of his jeans and pulled on his usual grin as he spotted Kat and Lucas. They were sitting on the steps of one of the townhouses down the street, and Bobby was genuinely surprised by how carelessly the dark-haired man looked.

“…And then Bobby goes “Och, bit Kat does lik' a guid cake, 'n' 'twas a guid cake!” Lucas mimicked his accent, sending the girl into an outburst of giggles.

“I thought I’ve misheard that question,” Kat wiped the tears from under her eyes. “I was like what?”

Bobby came up closer, but before he could approach them, Kat turned her head as if she felt him.

“What are you two on about?”

“The infamous crotch cupcake,” Lucas smirked. “The speculations were wild, I’m telling you.”

Kat scooched closer to Lucas and patted the space next to her. Bobby sat down carefully, and her hand immediately came to rest on his knee.

“Where’s Johno?” She asked, taking a sip from a coffee cup she had in her hand.

“He had to cover up for someone at the kitchen,” Lie slipped effortlessly of his tongue before Bobby could even give it a thought.

“Well, sucks for him,” Kat shrugged, returning her attention back to Lucas’ phone. “Hey, show Bobby that meme…”

Bobby bent over Kat’s knees to glance at the screen, but his thoughts were far away. His phone buzzed in his back pocket again, and Bobby ignored it, again.

Now, he officially had no place to be in Glasgow, he could leave right now and never look back.

Kat’s personal phone beeped, and she shifted her body to fish it out of the purse.

“Guys! I’ve got a text!” She yelped loudly, making a couple of passersby look suspiciously at her.

Lucas and Bobby chuckled, looking at her with a mix of amusement and adoration.

“Oh, it’s Kassam,” Her eyes lit up. “He saw my stories from just now, he’s doing a show at Barrowland Ballroom tonight… I’m not even commenting on that name… He asks if we’re free to come round?”

She typed her reply.

“I said we are,” Redhead grinned. “He’s making a track about his time on Love Island.”

“I honestly don’t remember the lad,” Lucas shrugged.

“He’s been in the Villa for like one night,” Bobby confirmed. “He’s actually cool, we’ve spoken a couple of times after the show.”

“He’s lovely,” Kat smiled at her phone as the response popped up on the screen. “Oh, great, he says he’ll save us some passes… Oh!” She jumped at the spot. “We should invite Johno and others!”

Bobby felt his cheeks and neck flushing deep red as she looked expectedly at him.

“I, um, will text them, yeah…”

“Well, do it.”

He rolled his eyes but got up to and reached for his phone. There were two missed calls and three texts from Theo. Johno must’ve been pissed with him, but Bobby wasn’t going to let him just insult his relationship. He knew that most of his friends weren’t Kat’s fans, but they respected his choice and it was all he could ask for. Johno was way out of line.

**Kat invited ya’ll tae jyne us th' nicht. There’s this shaw at BB, she kens th' DJ.**

The reply came almost immediately.

**Ah dinnae care aboot th' shaw, whit th' hell did happen atween ye 'n' Johno?**

**Ye know exactly what happened. Kat was sweet enough to invite you guys but don’t come round if you plan to attack my girlfriend.**

Bobby pushed the phone back into his pocket and looked at Kat and Lucas remembering redhead’s words that the older man is going through something.

 _Lottie seemed rattled as well_ , Bobby thought to himself. Lucas laughed at Kat’s joke, but his eyes remained way too serious. Kat squeezed his arm affectionately as if trying to reassure him, and Bobby’s heart swollen with tenderness. She always put others above herself, always had the right words, always knew how to calm down…

Bobby watched them for a long moment. They really were close. These past three weeks didn’t go easy on his girl, Bobby knew that. She tried her best not to show it but he knew her all too well to not notice how hard it was for her to just drag herself out of bed, and how sometimes over-agitated she was, to the point she could barely sit. She just needed to move or this nervous energy would’ve destroyed her.

And now, she finally looked like her old self, the girl he saw on the first day of the show.

She knew how to keep it together so others wouldn’t see she’s falling apart, but now she looked like she wasn’t pretending, like she was genuinely happy, and Bobby was grateful for that. He was grateful to Lucas for being a good friend to her – and to him, for that matter.

Bobby didn’t know how and when that happened, but Lucas had fallen for Kat, fast and hard. But he never tried to act on that, since the moment he knew about her feelings for Bobby, he stepped away.

This posh, somewhat condescending guy turned out to be nothing like that. He was caring and sincere, and he respected Bobby’s relationship enough to actually help him whenever he needed it. Rahim, Gary, and Noah helped him, too, but what Lucas did… he helped him to get the girl he wanted for himself, and that count for a lot in Bobby’s books.

He smiled and stepped forward, catching their attention.

“So, what’d you guys want to experience in the city with the biggest heart?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A


	3. You wove your thread into my fate...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 🎵Music:  
> Obsess - Enjoli  
> Control - CHVRN

The day had passed by in a whirlwind. Both Kat and Bobby seemed to have a competition on who’s going to cheer him up to the point he just explodes with that fucking cheerfulness. Lucas wasn’t sure if he just looked like sad shit or they somehow knew that there was something going on with him but nonetheless, by the time it was almost ten in the evening, his cheeks were hurting from all the laughing.

These two looked different together from how he remembered them being in the Villa – but also, exactly the same.

When Kat woke him up at six in the morning and presented him with a _fait accompli_ that they’re going to Glasgow and he had no part to say, Lucas wasn’t much thrilled. His head was throbbing, and overall, he felt like shit, and he couldn’t imagine hopping on the plane and then spending all day long watching her and Bobby together, so cute and in love, it’ll make him throw up.

But he couldn’t say no. He needed to spend time with her, these past two weeks he’s been missing her like crazy, their short FaceTime sessions stopped cutting in after day two.

She woke him up, and she was wearing his shirt and pajama pants, and she smelled like his shower gel and shampoo, and when she bent over above him, he couldn’t stop himself and wrapped her into his arms. Her damp hair brushed his bare chest, and only then he’d noticed that he was undressed.

He was pretty sure he didn’t do it, so it must’ve been her… and his face flushed with a hot wave of embarrassment.

“Sorry, I got really drunk last night,” He mumbled into the crook of her neck.

Kat pulled slightly away, staring into his eyes. He was sure she’s going to say something comforting, maybe even apologize for letting him get drunk – because that kind of person she was – but instead, she smiled mischievously.

“For a grown-ass man you’re a horrible drunk,” She winked at him. “I’ve got a lot to teach you, young Padawan.”

She always knew how to put him at ease, how to make his racing mind slow down… He knew that many people didn’t understand their friendship – and even more, implied that there’s something else behind the friendship façade.

But the truth was, he’d be anyone she wanted him to be, just to be close to her. He just needed her so much, and sometimes, it was terrifying. And he couldn’t bring himself to talk about it, even to his mother who was nothing but understanding these past three weeks.

Lucas couldn’t bring himself to watch the show back. He was petrified of what he might see. Others have already started and been constantly spamming the group chats, but he wasn’t ready yet, even though Dr. Lang strongly advised him to watch it so he could ‘start processing the hidden reasons behind his feelings’.

Lucas grimaced every time he thought of the therapist, counting days until he can tell him to go fuck himself. The only bright side was that he didn’t have to see him personally, unlike Kat.

_A bit too late to worry about her mental health state._

Coming to Glasgow with her – spending time with her _and_ Bobby – was something he needed to get used to if he wanted this friendship to last. But he didn’t expect that it’ll be so easy to be around them, he barely felt himself a third wheel.

He felt… loved. Needed. And this wasn’t a feeling he was accustomed to.

Lucas shook his head returning back into reality where he and Bobby were waiting for Kat to pick an outfit for tonight. Bobby looked a bit uncertain about his own new button-up in shimmering fabric, but it was still better than his old t-shirt he’d been wearing all day.

“One thing for sure,” Kat sighed through the dressing room door. “Glasgow is definitely not a fashion capital of the world.”

She pushed the door open, facing two men as they both sat on the couch.

“Well?”

Lucas could hear Bobby’s breath stutter the moment baker saw his girlfriend. She was wearing a short gold dress with a thigh-split and low cuts on back and front, and it looked like it was made of small metal coins or something.

“You look gorgeous,” Lucas managed a light-hearted smile as his eyes burned deeper into her body as if trying to imprint her image on his brain.

He spotted the glances Kat and Bobby exchanges and rushed to avert his gaze.

“I need shoes,” Kat noted, checking herself in the mirror.

“Something with open toes,” Lucas prompted. “You know, for Bobby.”

He and Kat both chuckled as Bobby’s face turned pink.

“You won’t let go of that, would ye?”

“Nope.”

“Not a chance.”

Bobby rolled his eyes at them and looked down at his phone, frowning a little. Lucas’d noticed that baker was a bit fidgety the entire day even though he didn’t really let it show. But every time he got a text, Scot’s face turned a bit concerned and he would just mainly ignore messages.

When Kat walked past them to find a sales assistant, Lucas turned to the younger guy.

“What’s wrong?” He asked directly. “And don’t even try with ‘nothing’s wrong, what are you on about” cause I’m not buying into that.”

Baker’s cheeks flushed red and he glanced worriedly towards where Kat just went.

“Had she noticed?”

“I’ve no doubt,” Lucas nodded.

Bobby looked defeated, and Lucas squeezed his shoulder.

“Just tell me.”

“I… um, well, me and Johno – the guy you’ve met this morning – we kind of got in a fight.”

“Over her?”

Bobby looked at him, stunned.

“How’d you guessed?”

“Kat told me he didn’t like her,” Lucas shrugged. “And you don’t seem like a person who gets into fights over, well, anything… except her.”

Lucas remembered all too well the way Bobby snapped at him when he brought Blake back into the Villa, if not for others, he would’ve actually punched him, Lucas had no doubt. And all other times when this usually friendly baker talked back at people were the times it involved Kat.

“You’re not wrong,” Bobby sniggered sardonically. “I wish she wasn’t so nice,” He sighed. “She thought it’d be important for me to spend time with my mates, so she asked me to invite them with us… and I honestly have no idea how it’s going to turn out, considering…”

He trailed off, frowning. Back in the Villa, everyone knew that Kat’s family was against her relationship with Bobby, but they couldn’t even think that Bobby’s friends might be against this relationship as well.

“Are they coming?” Lucas wondered.

“See for yourself.”

Bobby handed him his phone and turned away as if he couldn’t watch Lucas reading those texts.

Lucas fought back the urge to read into Bobby’s texts with Kat and opened the most recent group chat. The more he read the darker his face became.

He took a few deep breaths just so he doesn’t say how much he hated these people right now.

Bobby noticed his reaction and nodded.

“Yeah… It wasn’t really bad before this morning though. I figured it’s fine if they don’t approve of our relationship as long as they keep their opinions to themselves, I mean, I disliked my friend Louis now-husband Dean for the first two years of their marriage so…” Bobby frowned. “But Johno had really overstepped it this morning, so I had to cut it off. And now, they’re all on his side and I… well, not much I can do ‘bout that.”

Lucas looked deeply into the baker’s eyes. It was almost bizarre, to sit on a couch next to his rival, supporting his relationship with the woman he himself was in love with. His mother was surely right: he did change. _She_ changed him. He was never selfless. If he wanted something – or someone – he just went for it, no matter who might’ve got hurt. And now, one thing on his mind was how to make Bobby feel better.

“You did the right thing,” Lucas said firmly. “I don’t know what their problem is, but it is _their_ problem, not yours. Kat is good for you.”

“No joking,” Kat chuckled behind their backs, making both men jerk.

Redhead eyed them a bit suspiciously and walked around the couch to show off her full outfit. Lucas whistled under his breath, and Bobby’s cheeks went bright red as he took her in.

“Great, that’s the exact reaction I was going for,” She smirked, twirling, and wiggled her toes. “For you, toe guy.”

Bobby rolled his eyes, but there was a grin glued to his lips. When they finally left, it was already dark as hell and chilly, and Kat shivered.

“We should drop by the hotel,” Bobby suggested, pointing at the bags in his hands. “I also might need to use a bathroom.”

When their cab stopped before the hotel doors, baker sprinted towards the building.

“I hope you don’t regret coming with me,” Redhead said quietly, her eyes locked on her own knees.

Lucas' hand gently coiled Kat’s chin making her look at him.

“Not for a second,” He said softly. “I’m glad you’ve brought me here.”

“You are?”

“I am,” He nodded, tracing his thumb across the girl’s cheekbone. “It’s always better when you’re around.”

His heart sunk when she cuddled up to him, resting her head on his shoulder, and her scent enveloped him. He would recognize this scent anywhere, vanilla and jasmine, sweet and a little sharp, just like she was herself. Most of the time, she was the one to sacrifice herself, always ready to help – but that was until someone messed up with the ones she loved.

She turned heads everywhere she went – but her true beauty was in the way she treated people.

Lucas sighed and pulled Bobby’s phone out of his pocket.

“Look,” He pushed the phone into Kat’s hand.

“Bobby’s phone?” 

“I, erm, borrowed it… because I wanted to show something to you.”

Bobby didn’t have a password or even FaceId on his phone, and Lucas felt a little poke of jealousy: Bobby had absolutely no trust issues, unlike himself. He trusted his friends to respect his privacy, and he trusted Kat to trust him. And Lucas… he did not trust even himself.

Lucas knew that baker will be pissed if he learns what he did, but he also knew that Kat will be disappointed if she ever learns he knew about what happened between her boyfriend and his friends but never told her. He knew that she’d want to try and make things right.

He showed her a few messages, just the ones about Bobby’s fight with Johno.

Kat’s face fell.

“I can’t believe he actually lied… I mean, it was obvious something’s been bugging him but lying like that…”

Lucas frowned, feeling a knot tightening in his stomach.

“I shouldn’t have…”

“No,” She interrupted him firmly. “I’m glad you showed this to me. I can’t make them like me but I can at least make sure they know I care about him.”

Kat’s sad eyes found his.

“I’m sorry that they’d dragged you into this nonsense.”

Lucas pulled the girl into a hug and planted a gentle kiss on top of her head.

“What’s your plan then?”

With one of her hands still wrapped around him, redhead looked at the phone again.

“I’ll invite Johno to Kassam’s show. Ask him if he wants to talk and clear the air. If he does, it might save one of Bobby’s friendships. And if it doesn’t… well, Bobby’s better off without friends who can’t support him, right?”

She didn’t look certain but there wasn’t much else she could do. Lucas watched Kat as she sent Johno’s number to herself and then deleted the last text from Bobby’s phone.

_I hope I did the right thing…_

The car door opened the moment Kat pressed ‘send’, and Bobby climbed inside.

“Missed me?” Bobby grinned at both of them. “What’s with the faces?”

“That’s our ‘happy to see your faces‘.” Lucas joked and let Bobby’s phone slip from his hand onto the car floor quietly. “Oh, Bobby, isn’t that your phone?”

He pointed down.

“Thanks!” Bobby grabbed his phone. “Wouldn’t be good if anyone saw the pics…”

Bobby’s face turned red and he trailed off, glancing at Kat.

_I don’t want to know about that._

Kat’s phone buzzed and she quickly typed the reply. Her face was unreadable, and Lucas was ready to kick himself for showing her those texts. None of those people deserved a second chance, especially that Johno asshole who must’ve said something even more fucked up to make Bobby cut him off.

“Wow, guys,” Bobby pointed somewhere outside the window.

A large crowd gathered before the concert hall’s doors, slowly moving inside.

“He must be pretty popular now,” Lucas noted.

“Kassam has been successful way before Love Island,” Kat smiled. “I’ve watched some of the videos, and I think the show benefited more from having him than the other way around.”

“Is there a back door or something?” Lucas frowned.

“Drive 'til th' neist intersection 'n' caw richt,” Bobby instructed their driver. “What?” He looked at his friends. “I’ve been here before.”

“I’ve no doubt,” Kat giggled. “Paisley Cuddle was big shit in Glasgow, wasn’t it?”

“What?” Lucas mused in. “Right, you were in a band!” He looked really excited, and Bobby rolled his eyes at the older guy. “Now, my mission is to watch all the videos and learn the lyrics…”

“There’s a really good one, something about fucking a girl in a club bathroom… or maybe, it was just about a club sandwich, hard to tell,” Kat continued with the teasing. “If you think his accent is bad now…”

“You guys just suck,” Bobby pouted and paid the driver before climbing out of the cab.

“He’s so cute when he’s angry,” Redhead noted, pushing the door on her side open.

It was almost excruciating, to see her so happy with somebody else. Not for even a second, she made him feel uncomfortable or like a third wheel, but every bone in Lucas’ body felt how far away he was from her. It felt like he was watching a boat drifting through the ocean as he himself was left on the shore.

_She will never belong to you._

He needed to learn to live with it. He had to learn how to live in a world where she will never touch him the way she did before, and she will never moan under his hands, and she will never ever kiss him like she used to.

One of the security guards met them at the back door and lead them through corridors, and Lucas couldn’t help but think about how this Kassam guy feels about her now. Does he still have a crush on her? Most likely, he does, since they speak regularly and he gets to see her and hear her voice, and that alone is enough for her to keep a guy on a hook.

Lucas still couldn’t forget what his mother said about Kat on the day he came back home.

_“Every time she knocks, men can’t help but let her in.”_

His mother, a former supermodel, knew exactly what she was talking about: she herself was like that. She could’ve walked all over a guy, break his heart, make him lose everything – but it was just a word she needed to say, and he’d be down on his knees before her. Lucas had seen it for himself, but the only exception was that his mom had learned to do that, and Kat seemed to be oblivious to this little talent of hers.

And that made her even more dangerous.

“Kat!’ A loud man’s voice snapped Lucas out of his thoughts. “My Habibi.”

A tall, lean man with ink-black hair and blue eyes stepped forward, wrapping his arms around redhead. This hug lasted just a couple of seconds before DJ released her and extended his hand to shake hands with Bobby and Lucas.

“Nice to see you both,” Kassam grinned at the boys. “I’ve made sure to let the security know to let in your friends when they arrive, so that should be all fine.”

“Thanks,” Kat gave DJ one of her heart-stopping smiles.

“Fifteen minutes!” The green room’s door flew open revealing a short girl with a headset.

“Hey, Lexi, show my friends to the VIP area, okay?”

The girl nodded and waved them over.

“I’ll see you lot after,” Kassam gave Kat’s hand a quick squeeze before they left.

They followed Lexi, and Lucas couldn’t help his eyes as they wandered up and down Kat’s body. Being so close to her, in this dark corridor, it did something to him. He felt it last night, too, and he had to get drunk to the point his mind would just stop registering his own emotions. At least, last night he had her to himself, he could wrap her in his arms, he could press her body into his as they were dancing…

_Bobby isn’t a jealous type, but he also has his limits. Especially, after all the shit his so-called friends threw at him._

Kat’s phone beeped, and she frowned a little.

“What’s wrong?” Lucas whispered to her, glancing at Bobby who’s been caught into a chat with Lexi, a ‘huge fan of his’.

“I thought it’s Johno,” She looked down at her phone. “I just… well, not much I can do anyway, right?”

Lucas grabbed her arm and squeezed it affectionately. He should have stayed away, now he knew that for sure. He couldn’t even explain to himself what’s gotten into him the moment he decided to tell Kat about Bobby’s fight with his friends.

“Yeah. Let them in,” Lexi said suddenly. “Your friends are here, I’m going to meet them in a moment,” She opened the door.

The VIP section was just this little space aside from the main dance floor, with two plush couches and a table.

“Be right back.”

When Lexi was gone, Bobby caught Lucas’ gaze.

“I hope it won’t get weird,” Baker whispered, glancing at Kat who was talking to a waitress.

“Erm, Bobby?” Lucas knew he had to tell the younger guy what he’d done. “I need to tell you something.”

“What’s up?” Bobby gave him a reassuring smile.

“I might’ve told Kat about… this… you know…”

For a second, Bobby just looked puzzled, and then realization dawned on him.

“Oh.”

“I’m sorry, I should’ve kept it a secret it’s just…”

“It’s fine,” Bobby frowned a bit but shook it off. “Really, it was a hard position to be put in, I get it… I’m kind of glad you did, it was weird, lying to her.”

“You’re not mad?”

“Nah,” Bobby patted his back, and the older guy felt like a heavy weight had just been dropped off his shoulders.

Kat made her way back to the couch and flopped down between them.

“I’ve ordered tequila,” She smirked at Lucas. “Time to teach you how to drink like a grown-ass man you are.”

Lucas rolled his eyes, but his mind wouldn’t stop racing. It was _their_ drink, after what happened between them that night in Villa’s kitchen, it will always be their drink.

There must’ve been something in his eyes that caught Kat’s attention and make her cheeks flush with such a deep shade of red it was even visible in dim light. Right now, they both knew what the other was thinking about – and neither of them knew how to feel about it.

They’ve heard loud voices coming from behind them, and a moment later Lexi appeared along with three men. Bobby’s body went tense for a second before he jumped to his feet to greet his mates.

Kat scooched closer to Lucas and whispered:

“The tall, dark, and handsome asshole is Theo. And the other two are Louis and Dean, Louis is the one that’s looking like a pitbull at me.”

She waved at them as men approached them and sat down on the other couch.

“Guys, this is Lucas,” Bobby introduced them. “This is Theo, Louis, and Dean.”

“Nice to meet you all,” Lucas nodded.

“Likewise,” Dean gave him a half-smile, two other men just nodded.

_Right. They hate me._

“So, how do you guys know this DJ?” Dean asked.

“He’s been on a show with us,” Kat replied gratefully: Dean was probably the only one who didn’t think she’s not good enough for Bobby and treated her fairly well when they’ve met last time.

“Oh, yeah, I remember now,” Dean nodded. “It’s a shame he and that goth girl didn’t work out… Oh,” He glanced at Lucas. “I didn’t…”

“It’s fine,” Lucas stopped him immediately, swallowing through a sudden lump in his throat.

“Ah tak' it, ye'r mukkers wi' him, richt, Kat?” Louis wondered.

“Mukkers?” She raised an eyebrow, and Lucas chuckled softly.

“Friends, mates, pals,” Theo explained, visibly annoyed.

“Right, makes total sense,” Kat smiled sweetly. “Yeah, we’re good mates.”

A waitress appeared with a bottle of tequila and shot glasses, and Bobby shifted forward to unscrew the lid and fill up the glasses as fast as possible.

“To friends!” Bobby said with a hint of uncertainty in his voice.

Dean raised his glass first and then everyone else joined. Before they could continue with the conversation, all lights went off and the music stopped. The crowd cheered loudly, and Kat joined it, making both Lucas and Bobby shift a bit away from her.

Lucas’ mouth twitched a little, but he managed to hide his smile. He glanced at Bobby, who looked at the girl adoringly.

Finally, a heavy, sultry beat played, and the stage lit up. Kassam raised his hands up greeting the audience, and the screen behind his back went on. It was divided into parts, images changing rapidly.

Kat waved over and asked for another bottle and filled the glasses up again.

“Anyone fancies a dance?” She had to almost yell.

“I need another drink before I can dance to that,” Dean threw the liquor back. “I’ll join you in a bit.”

“A'd lik' tae catch up wi' Bobby,” Theo barked, and Louis nodded in agreement.

“Well, we’ll be right over there.”

Kat grabbed his hand before Lucas could react and pulled him towards the crowd.

“Hypocrites and morons,” She huffed, pushing past some of the dancers until they were in the middle of the crowd. “I’m so sorry you had to witness that.”

“You went well about it,” Lucas stroked a strand of hair out of Kat’s face as she moved closer into him and wrapped her arms around his neck. “And you’ve got nothing to be sorry about.”

He listened to the melody, letting his body move freely to the beat. He rested his hands on the redhead’s hips, and now could almost anticipate her every movement and reciprocate it. Their bodies were so close he could feel her heart hammering against his chest. She was so beautiful when she danced, so raw and vivid and intense, and it took his breath away as he watched her move in his arms.

“I fucking hate this,” Her hot breath burned at the skin of his neck as Kat leaned into him.

One of his hands traveled up her back and tangled in her curls, pulling hair lightly to make her look up at him.

“They’re just idiots, you know that.”

“They’re still Bobby’s friends. I don’t want to be the reason he lost them.”

He looked down at her, losing himself for a moment inside the two voids that her eyes were. She looked at him desperately, letting the true emotions take over her usual ‘everything is under control’ mask. She was so eerie beautiful, Lucas barely managed to restrain himself from kissing her. Instead, he moved his hand and stroked his thumb across her cheek.

“You are the reason Bobby is happy,” He said firmly. “They’re just jealous if you ask me.”

“Of what?”

“Of you… of the way he feels because of you. Don’t underestimate the power of people’s jealousy,” He sniggered sardonically. “Sometimes, it makes them do ugliest and stupidest shit.”

_Like working yourself up to the point you can’t hear anyone else, not even your own heart…_

Kat looked him in the eyes, catching on the change in his tone of voice immediately. She knew that he was talking about Blake, and how badly he’d screwed up by bringing her into the Villa – and he knew that she knew but had no idea how to make this moment any less weird.

She knew he had feelings for her – and he knew that there was no point in denying those feelings, but neither of them knew what to do with that.

“I just feel like I should’ve tried harder to make them like me,” She admitted finally with a sad half-smile.

_My fucking heart._

“What you did today,” Lucas said firmly, coaxing her chin closer to his face as they stopped moving completely. “It was really good. You’ve invited his friends and made them feel welcomed even though you knew they wouldn’t do the same for you.”

He pressed a soft kiss to her forehead and then loosened his grip, letting both of their bodies move again. This entire day was really weird, and Lucas wasn’t sure he’d really pulled off this whole friendship thing, but right here and now, everything felt right.

Having her in his arms felt right. Breathing in her sent felt right. Loving her felt right, too, no matter how painful and wrong it was.

 _I can do this,_ he thought to himself spinning the girl round and pressing her back against his chest. _I can love her from afar, as long as she lets me have her in my arms like this._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A


	4. I bow down when she comes around...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "...I'll become your medusa  
> And turn you to stone  
> You'll still taste all my venom  
> When nobody's home..."
> 
> [i could be your goddess -CASHFORGOLD]

It’s been four days since Bobby moved to London. Four days spent between Kat’s flat, bakery, and photoshoots. Four days since his once best friend, almost brother, had become a stranger. Four days of almost no sleep, too much caffeine and not enough time in a day.

“Bobby!”

Sasha’s voice snapped him out of his weird trance, and Bobby looked up at his manager.

“What now?” He frowned at the older man, annoyed at being interrupted.

“There are people outside the bakery, your fans.”

“Your what?” Bobby repeated, still caught in a weird haze.

Sasha rolled his eyes.

“ _Your_ fans. Three young ladies who’d love to take a pic with you and post it on their socials. One of them has over three hundred followers on youtube and is currently vlogging from the main part of this store. It’s good for publicity.”

Russian man tutted.

“Get a move, well.”

Bobby sighed but obliged: he hired Sasha specifically because he was absolutely straightforward and had this ability to attract ‘useful’ people without even trying. Also, he preferred this guy who thought that Love Island was a trashy show and never watched an episode over Bambi-eyed thirty-something who was clearly determined to have a little work affair with him.

He went out of the kitchen, smiling, ready to pretend that he actually gives a shit about them girls.

He needed to finish the last batch of mini fruit tarts for an exhibition opening at Kat’s friend gallery. It turned out, Kat knew half of the city, and Bobby sometimes couldn’t help but wonder how it happened that he got so lucky to call himself her best friend, even though there were so many people around her.

Back in the Villa, she said she didn’t have real friends, and that for her, it was Friends Island above anything else. But now he saw all those people circling around her like planets spin around the sun, and Bobby couldn’t believe his own luck.

When the chat became a little too flirty, his eyes searched for Sasha - but instead, they found Kat. She was just outside the window, watching him struggle to keep the conversation in a friendly manner, and her lips were stretched in a grin. She arched an eyebrow at him ever so slightly and slowly tucked a little strand of hair behind her ear, looking at her boyfriend from beneath her long lashes.

Just this small gesture was enough to send his heart into a merry jig. Somehow, wearing an oversized off-shoulder sweater tucked sloppily into the waistband of her white high-waisted shorts, she looked hotter than any Victoria’s Secret supermodels. She was just so effortlessly perfect, and Bobby couldn’t even pretend that he’s keeping up with the chat.

“Thanks so much for stopping by, guys,” He smiled widely, but his eyes were still glued to the redhead girl outside the window.

Sasha followed his gaze and rolled his eyes before stepping in between Bobby and three girls.

“Ladies, let me show you the other exit, there will be a flower installment…”

Kat waited until others were gone and finally walked into the bakery. Bobby caught her in his arms before she could say anything and kissed her deeply. It’s been almost five hours since the last time his lips touched hers, and it was too fucking long.

“I’ve missed you,” He whispered as his mouth traveled down her neck, peppering it with kisses.

“Aww,’ Kat cocked her eyebrow. “Hadn’t those lovely ladies kept you entertained?”

Bobby chuckled.

“I’m a tough crowd.”

Sasha’s loud cough made them pull apart, as the man cleared his throat and tapped at his wrist.

“Tarts.”

“Oh, shit.”

Bobby sprinted towards the kitchen, and Kat slowly walked to one of the tables and threw her purse onto it.

“New collection?” Sasha grabbed the bag to take a better look at it. “I’m torn between this color and tapioca.”

Kat plopped down on one of the chairs and wiggled her foot at him.

“I needed something to go with these babies.”

“Bobby needs to step up his fashion game,” Sasha chuckled.

“I wouldn’t hold my breath,” Kat smirked.

“Oi, you two!” Bobby’s voice sounded a bit muted from behind the kitchen doors. “You know I can hear you.”

“That’s why we’re talking about you,” Sasha winked at Kat. “Anyway, I’m out. I’m meeting with that restaurant’s owner tomorrow morning.”

“I remember!” Bobby yelped from the kitchen. “Bye!”

“Remind him to leave his business cards at the gallery event tonight.”

Sasha put a box on the table before Kat, gave her a small peck on a cheek and left. Kat locked the front door behind him and slowly walked into the kitchen, stopping in the doorway. She just loved watching Bobby when he cooked. He looked so full of joy and determination, so excited and so confident – a rare sight. Behind his playful silliness, he was deeply insecure, and behind all the flirting, he never thought he was good enough – and she wished she could’ve made him see himself the way she saw him.

In her eyes, he was just perfect, despite all those things that would drive her mad being a part of someone else’s character.

Bobby spotted her stare and watched her with his peripheral as she just stood there in a doorway, gazing at him. She looked fine, just a little into her thoughts, and he let out a sigh of relief. In these past four weeks, he’d learned to notice those times her mind started wandering into the dark place inside of her. And when it did, Bobby felt absolutely helpless.

He’d never dealt with depression before, neither he or his friends had it, and most of the time the only thing he could do was just being with her, learning slowly how to help her through the sudden mood swings.

Bobby grabbed one of the little tarts and walked over the kitchen island to Kat.

“Wanna taste?”

Redhead focused her eyes on him and nodded.

Gently, he brought the pastry to her lips, his eyes locked on hers, now the color of pine trees veined with amber. This, he’d learned back in the Villa: her eyes changed color depending on the state of mind she was in, from emerald-green to dark amber, almost animal orange.

She lowered her head to take a bite but instead of food, her mouth found his finger, and Bobby gasped when she dragged her teeth teasingly over it.

“You’re not playing it fair,” His voice broke, and pastry chef had to clear his throat.

“I never said I was a fair person.”

She pushed him back until Bobby’s back was pressed against the counter. She kicked off her shoes, and suddenly she was looking up at him, with the unmistakable expression that made hid dick grow harder. He’d never met someone whose eyes could literally _speak_ like hers were speaking to his body right now.

Kat ran her hands down his arms and took a step back, burning little holes in Bobby’s body with her gaze.

“Take your pants off.”

Her voice sent a thrill of electricity down his body, and Bobby swallowed hard as his shaking fingers unbuckled his belt. His mind drifted into a foggy haze and his vision blurred, giving place to almost uncontrollable desire. He hooked his thumbs into the waistband of his jeans and shoved them with his boxers down until it was a puddle around his ankles.

He was so turned on he had to clench his hands at the counter behind him to keep his body straight. The world around had shrunk to the size of this kitchen, right now, nothing – no one – else existed. Being exposed like that was disturbingly thrilling, Bobby’s dick twitched at this feeling of extreme openness, and he moaned softly, fighting back an urge to touch himself.

“Now, your shirt.”

Bobby obliged eagerly, throwing a piece of clothing on the floor and bit down on his lip, looking at Kat pleadingly.

She tilted her head to her side, as if considering his silent begging, and then smirked wickedly. He almost groaned in frustration when she slowly walked over the counter.

“What are you…”

“I don’t remember allowing you to speak,” Her soft, quiet voice sounded from behind him, and a second later she was sitting on the counter behind Bobby, both of her legs hanging on each side of him. It took all of his willpower to keep his hands clenched on the counter instead of gripping her legs. His body tensed as he restrained himself from touching her, and Kat let out a dark chuckle.

“Good boy,” She whispered, and her hot breath on the back of his neck almost sent him into sensory overload.

He could feel every part of his body, was aware of each little nerve, and his body was screaming for her touch. He held still, mentally begging her to do something, do anything to him. Still avoiding touching him, she leaned in closer, and her breath teased the shell of his ear.

“I love watching you in the kitchen,” Kat said softly as she started tracing the air just a millimeter above the skin of his arm. “The way you use your hands to knead the dough, I keep picturing the way they work my body…”

His cock grew even harder even though it seemed impossible by now. Bobby’s breath stuttered as he imagined his hands mapping her body, fingers digging deep into her silky-soft skin, and how she’d arch into him when his fingers found her breasts… A low, desperate groan escaped his throat as she continued:

“It’s so hot, the way you use your hands… How you dip your fingers into the icing, and I think of how those fingers feel inside of me… And when you lick off the cream, I can only think of all those things your tongue does to me.”

“Fuck, Kat-“ His hand involuntarily slipped off the counter and slid down his body.

She caught both of his hands and roughly guided them behind Bobby’s back, taking a firm grip of his wrist with one hand. He whined and bucked his hips frantically, so desperate for some relief, he’d forgotten there was only air before him.

“Patience is a virtue,” Kat laughed softly.

“That I don’t possess,” Bobby replied in between deep breaths.

“Well, that’s a shame,” She suddenly licked a prominent bone at the base of his neck and then blew cold air over the wet stripe, almost drawing a cry out of the man. “You know what was the first time I thought about what would it feel like to have your cock in my mouth?”

 _Dying of arousal isn’t the worse death there,_ Bobby could only think to himself as a hot wave of shudder ran through his entire body, heaving his chest and making his dick throb. Kat’s fingers dug deeper into his wrists, keeping him from any more movements.

“On our first day in the Villa,” She continued. Her voice was thick and sweet, like hot caramel, and it sunk into him, tingling on baker’s skin. “When you told that dick-shaped cake story.”

“And you asked if it was good.”

Bobby’s voice was low and raspy, and it made her core pulse with desire. His voice alone could get her going, and now _she_ had to fight back an urge to press her body into his back, wrap her legs around him so tightly he wouldn’t be able to leave, never.

“I couldn’t help but wonder what the real thing looked like… and how you’d taste.”

“Fuck, if you don’t-“ His breath stammered, as he felt little shockwaves going through his body, concentrating on his aching length.

Kat’s free hand flew up to Bobby’s face, pressing against his mouth, just like she used to do back in the Villa when she needed to keep him quiet. Desperately, he flickered his tongue against her palm, drawing circles on the sensitive skin.

“Now, who’s cheating,” She whispered with a smile on her lips and pressed her hand harder. “I love seeing you like this.”

His arms were hurting from her grip, and his dick was pleading for attention, and his throat was aching, and he’d never felt more turned on in his entire life. He was ready to beg her to let him touch her, but he couldn’t even open his mouth now, and it was so fucking hot, he could just come from this sudden feeling of his submission to her.

“Will you keep quiet?” Kat asked almost gently, and Bobby gave her a strained nod.

Her hand left his mouth, and he gulped for air. She reached for a half-empty bowl of vanilla cream he’d made earlier out of boredom and scooped a little with two of her fingers.

“Want a taste?” She brought her hand closer to his mouth.

With a feral growl, he sucked her fingers deep into his mouth, swirling his tongue around them, and a quiet moan was his reward. She wanted him just as badly as he wanted her, even though she was way better at controlling it than he was.

His tongue slipped between her fingers, and he closed his eyes, picturing himself running his tongue over her slit, and then circling it around her clit just the way she liked it, tasting her the way _he_ liked… He moaned, and the vibration of his throat went straight into her core, making her thighs clench around Bobby’s hips as she wrapped her legs around him.

“Shit,” Her ankles brushed against his dick, and Bobby almost came from just a little touch.

Suddenly, she unwrapped herself from him and released his wrists from her grip, and a sharp pain jolted through his arms and shoulders. Bobby turned to his girlfriend, his eyes dark and wide with need, ready to do whatever she tells him to.

Instead, she pushed him back, and baker almost tripped over the jeans that were still wrapped around his ankles. It took her just a split of a second to slip down from the counter and get on her knees in front of him.

Her tongue traced across his lower abdomen, from one hipbone to another, and she looked up at him through the eyelashes, and he’d lost control.

His fingers threaded into her soft curls, pushing her head where he needed her the most.

Sometimes he wondered how something so beautiful and pure could be also something that brings up this feral side of him he didn’t know existed until recently. Her lips wrapped around his cock, and he pushed his hips forward, thrusting into her mouth until it hit the back of her throat, eliciting loud, impatient groans out of both of them.

He knew he wouldn’t last long, and he didn’t even try to. Her nails were raking up and down his thighs, leaving burning red trails on his skin, as he fucked her mouth, his vision all whited-out to even make out her face.

He might’ve been dying because his fucking life just flashed before his eyes, all those moments with her that brought them both here, to this kitchen, completely out of control. Bobby’s fingers dug deeper into Kat’s hair, and she moaned, vibrating all over him. He focused his eyes on her just in time so see her hand slipping inside her shorts, and her eyes rolled back for a moment, as she touched herself in time with the movements of her tongue, stroking his length sloppily.

She looked so fucking hot, he just couldn’t take this anymore. He was so overwhelmed with her, there was nothing else inside of him, only she.

“Oh, shit, I-I can’t…” Bobby’s breath stuttered somewhere in his throat when he felt little shockwaves spread through his body.

Kat looked up at him, and it was too much, and Bobby just lost it.

She felt her body arching into a bow uncontrollably as she saw the absolutely wild look in Bobby’s eyes. His hips bucked forward at the same time his hands pushed her face into him, and a loud growl left his mouth as he came deep inside her throat. She almost choked on him when her own release came down crushing. She’d collapsed on the floor the very same moment if she didn’t need to guide Bobby through his high. His movements slowed down, and eventually, he stopped.

Redhead ran her tongue gently over his length for the last time, and Bobby collapsed onto his knees, panting.

His hands gripped her shoulder, partially for stability and partially just not to break their tactile contact. Feeling her skin under his fingertips always made him feel at home, and now, he needed that feeling more than ever.

“Fuck, it was… fuck,” He mumbled through the rugged breaths, resting his forehead against Kat’s.

“Well, yeah, it kinda was,” She smirked. “Did you know that fucking someone’s mouth can give that person a sore throat?”

Bobby pulled away to look at her.

“Well, now I do.”

“Yeah,” Kat continued with a serious face. “Also, it can cause damage to esophagus and your jaw can accidentally get stuck open – or, clasp shut involuntarily, and you’ll bite someone’s dick off.”

By the end of her speech, she was barely holding back laughter while Bobby’s face was pure horror.

“Oh, god,” She cried out. “You should’ve seen your face right now, I wish we were still surrounded by cameras, this would be such a precious still.”

“You’re evil, you know that, right?” Bobby pulled his girlfriend in, wrapping her into his still shaking arms.

“I had a guess,” She nodded, caressing her thumb across the freckles on his cheek.

Bobby wiped the wet trails off her face.

“You’re wearing mascara,” He noticed.

“Yeah, that’s Lottie’s blowjob proof one, I’ve borrowed it off her back in the Villa.”

“Were you planning… you know… when you were getting ready?”

Kat studied Bobby’s blushing face for a second and shrugged.

“Gotta be prepared just in case,” She kissed him gently on the lips and looked up at the wall clock. “Get up, we should be at the gallery in fifteen minutes.”

Kat loaded prepared trays with tarts while Bobby fixed himself up, and a few minutes later they were already in a backseat of their uber, on their way to gallery. Bobby bent over the trays and smoothed Kat’s hair with his hands. Her curls were wild, and in combination with her bright red swollen lips she looked exactly what she was – fucked.

“Are you trying to make me look decent?” Redhead chuckled at his manipulations, and Bobby rolled his eyes. “That’s cute but nothing’s gonna change the fact that only ten minutes ago my mouth…”

He had to quickly press his hand to her lips before the driver gave them even more disapproving look than those he was already throwing their way. He loved this about her: the way she never really cared about how she might come across, but lately, he’d noticed that she was ether closed and withdrawn or way too full-on as if there was no more middle-ground for her.

So, he’d become that middle ground for her, pulling her out of her shell when she put a wall between herself and the entire word – and keeping her within the lines when they got too blurry for her to even see them. But still, there was a little part of him that just wanted to join her on the wild side…

“Why so serious?” Kat’s eyebrows arched as she caught his gaze.

Bobby just shrugged and kissed her deeply, tasting his own taste on her tongue, mixed with strawberries and… glaze?

“You nibbled,” He said accusingly.

“You’ve got no proof,” She huffed.

“You taste like glaze!” Bobby crossed his arms over his chest with a look of disbelief on his face.

“Maybe _you_ taste like glaze?”

His face and neck went such a deep shade of red, Kat almost considered calling an ambulance, just in case. Luckily, the car stopped right in front of the gallery, and they both climbed out of it, and Kat helped Bobby with the trays.

“How do you know the owner again?”

“From school,” Kat grabbed Bobby’s elbow to ensure he doesn’t trip and fall. “I studied Biology and Psychology, and he was struggling to get through the third year of Business and Management. Never finished.”

Kat pushed the back door open for Bobby and waited for him to get inside first.

“And he’s not the owner, he just runs it. I don’t know who owns this place.”

“Am I having hallucinations or is it my sweet Katherine that graced this poor man with her presence?”

A tall, dark-haired man with olive-toned skin appeared right in front of them, and Bobby almost bumped into him.

“Sorry,” He mumbled.

“Bobby, right?” The gallery manager smiled brightly at him. “Pleasure to meet you, I’m Giorgos. Let me help you.”

Giorgos grabbed one of the trays and led Bobby and Kat into the main space.

“It smells gorgeous,” He noted. “Kathe-Kat is a lucky girl.”

Bobby noticed that switch from Kat’s full name that clearly didn’t come naturally to her friend, and he remembered what Jared said back in the Villa, that she’d cut her name to change herself and the way people see her.

“I’m lucky that Kat has friends like yourself,” Bobby put the tray down onto one of the tables, and Giorgos waved over one of the waiters. “Thanks for hiring my bakery.”

“Here,” Kat shoved a stack of business cards into her friend’s hands.

“Totally succulent,” Giorgos read. “Is it like those memes or something?”

Kat rolled her eyes.

“I told him it’s a stupid name for a bakery, but he and his manager somehow decided it’s better than literally anything else.”

“It’s from the show,” Bobby explained.

“I kind of like it,” Dark-haired man admitted. “And I reckon, people who watched the show would be really thrilled. I’ll leave the cards on the tables and will keep a few for my friends, I know a ton people in constant need of baked goodies.”

He winked at Kat when his phone started ringing.

“Sorry, guys, I’ll catch you a bit later, okay? You’re staying for the viewing, right?”

Kat nodded.

“For a little bit.”

“Perfect.”

Giorgos smiled at both of them and wandered off.

“We’re staying?” Bobby arched his eyebrow, a bit disappointed: it was the first free evening they had in days, and he just wanted to spend it alone with her.

“I said for a little bit,” Redhead caught his longing gaze and shuffled closer to him. “Let’s just look around and wait for his speech, and then we can leave.”

“Fiiine,” Bobby’s hand snaked around her and came to rest on the small of Kat’s back. “But you owe me.”

“Oh, really?” She lowered her voice to whisper. “How’d you like me to repay you my debt?”

Bobby’s heart picked up the tempo when he spotted devilish sparks in her green eyes. Before he could find the words to respond, a loud voice coming from behind Kat’s back made them both jerk apart.

“Oh my god!” A girl’s voice with a prominent Russian accent became louder. “Bobby, can’t believe it’s you!”

A blue-eyed blonde girl in killer pumps walked up to them, smiling brightly, and Bobby stepped forward:

“Oksana?!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> I've finally updated the playlist, it only took two hours lol. so enjoy
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A
> 
> I know some of you haven't read Part 1 of the series and decided to read that as well... Just wanted to tell, y'all are brave souls, even I can't manage to read the entirety of You Can't Win in succession 
> 
> As always, thank you all so much for the constant love and support for this story


	5. Could it be that we don't own the will?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "...I don't know how to speak  
> So many versions of me  
> I've taken the foolish and buried the blind..."
> 
> [Beyond Today - James Gillespie]

“So, who’s that Oksana bitch?” Lottie flipped her hair over her shoulder and sent a forkful of scrambled eggs to her mouth.

She, Kat, and Priya had a late alfresco brunch, eager to catch-up before they go flat-hunting.

“She’s not a bitch,” Kat frowned a little, bottoming her third glass of mimosa. “She’s that Russian girl Bobby met six years ago in Glasgow. Now, she moved to London and is seeing the guy I know from Uni.”

“That’s kind of a drama,” Priya noted. “Do you have a picture?”

Kat rolled her eyes, regretting that she told the girls about last night’s encounter. Even without these two suspicious Miss Marples that experience was odd.

“What’s her deal then?” Lottie continued interrogation.

“She used to be in women gymnastics Olympics team, but she got trauma and had do leave big sports. She’s now a model or a blogger, I’m not sure.”

Kat waved over a waiter.

“Everything’s fine?”

“Check, please.”

Lottie chuckled.

“What?”

“Nothing. Sometimes, I forget how much of American you are.”

Kat rolled her eyes and elbowed the blonde gently. Even though both Priya and Lottie were a tad annoying about that whole Oksana situation, she was happy to finally see them somewhere besides Love Island PR-events.

“So, I’ve found three options that our witch queen admitted as acceptable,” Priya reported as all three of them climbed into a cab. “One in Chelsea, one in Kensington, and my favorite, Mayfair.”

“First, we’ll throw your luggage to my place, and then, we’ll walk,” Kat stated. “Before I settled for my apartment-flat, I walked the entirety of Knightsbridge to figure if I liked it here.”

“Have you seen Priya’s shoes?” Lottie chuckled. “There’s no way she could walk in those for more than, like, five minutes.”

“Oy!”

Kat listened to their playful banter with the slightest smile playing at the corners of her mouth, relieved that there were no further questions about Bobby’s blast from the past. It’s been a weird experience, even after she literally met half of the pub of Bobby’s friend-zoned hook-ups. Maybe, it was because Oksana wasn’t in Glasgow. Maybe, it was because he talked about her, unlike any other girls he hooked-up with or even dated. Or maybe, it was just because of the look that blonde bitch gave Kat when Bobby introduced her as his girlfriend.

Turned out, Oksana moved to London almost three years ago, and since then, “met a ton of amazing people” (read: had slept with half of London’ in-crowd). Now, she was seeing Giorgos, but she clearly wasn’t set on him – probably, because Giorgos would rather let a crocodile bite off his hand than settled for just one girl.

Later, the Russian girl admitted that she’d been watching the show only because she recognized Bobby and was planning to reach out but got “too caught up with new projects” (read: sucking dicks).

Kat did not like the girl, she seemed like someone who hogs the attention, and Kat wasn’t the one to give up on the spotlight. She defended her before Priya and Lottie, but she really, really, did not enjoy meeting Bobby’s teenage dream. 

“Kat, are you listening?” Priya’s hand shook redhead’s shoulder.

“Sorry, what is it again?”

Priya stared deeply into her eyes before repeating her last words.

“I said, where’s Bobby?”

“He and Sasha, his bakery manager, are having a meeting with an agent from the licensing agency. As if he’s opening a wine bar, not a place to buy cupcakes. He asked to pick him up when we’re done with our hunt and ready ‘for some real fun’, and that’s a direct quote.”

Kat’s personal phone beeped.

**It’s Friday.**

She smirked to herself and typed a reply.

**Is physiotherapisizing people so poorly paid that you decided to turn a penny as a human calendar?**

**You’re not half as funny as you think you are.**

**I’m way funnier than you.**

“Is it Bobby?” Lottie leaned into Kat to look at her phone. “Why’re you smiling?”

“No, it’s Lucas.”

“Oh.”

Blonde’s body tensed and she pulled back, resting her head against the back of the seat. Priya glanced at Lottie and then at Kat, and Lottie frowned a little shaking her head.

**Lottie and Priya are in town. They’ll stay with us until the end of Sunday. Did you forget?**

**It might’ve escaped my mind… Have fun then.**

**Are you cross?**

**No.**

**You are.**

Kat frowned, grazing her lower lip between her teeth. Lucas was supposed to come to London this weekend, and she asked him to, but he said he didn’t feel like hanging out with the gang… And she never insisted.

Her chest hurt a little when she typed another message.

**Please, can you just come here? We don’t have to hang out with the others all the time, Bobby will keep the girls entertained.**

**It’s okay, Kat. I’m not stealing you from your friends.**

The car stopped, and all three girls climbed out.

“It’s gorgeous here,” Priya’s eyes widened. “Wait, do you have a park view?”

Kat shook her head.

“I’m not _that_ reach. C’mon, let’s go, I’ve got someone I’d like to introduce you guys to.”

“Is that a doorman, a concierge, or an entire team of housemaids?” Lottie asked as they walked inside, greeted by the staff.

“It’s not really as posh as it looks like.”

This was probably the first time she felt truly uncomfortable about who she was. Before Love Island, she had no need to hide where she lived or whose kids she went to high school with. When Bobby moved in with her, she knew it was a bit too full-on for him, but he tried his best not to get overwhelmed by how excessively grandiose this place was.

Her father insisted to get her an apartment in this building, mainly because his college friend lived in a penthouse here and promised to keep an eye on Kat and make sure she’s safe and sound. If it was her choice, she’d move into a one-bedroom somewhere in Chelsea, in one of those cute little townhouses, where no one would care who she was, and how much her family paid for her to live there.

“Well, there’s a separate elevator for staff, it looks pretty posh to me,” Lottie’s loud voice echoed from the marble floor and columns.

**I really miss you, Luc.**

Redhead typed as they left the elevator on her floor and walked down the corridor. Lucas hadn’t been to her place yet, but she was sure that he wouldn’t make her feel uncomfortable, unlike the girls. She knew it wasn’t intentional and they were just excited, but she knew how exactly the staff and local residents feel about her, and she knew that they’ll be talking shit about her friends in no time at all, and she hated it.

“Okay, folks, remember the code,” She pressed the number combination on a little panel. “Now, your turn.”

“What is this number? 1015” Priya asked when the door closed behind them.

“Just random,” Kat wasn’t ready to admit that this was the day she fell for Jared, the guy who broke her fucking heart just a month ago, and who she loved for seven long years. “Guys, take a look around, I’ll make us something to drink before we go.”

She left the girls and walked into her kitchen.

“Hey,” She hunkered down next to her cat. “I knew I’d find you here.”

She brushed the soft silvery-grey fur with her fingertips.

“Do you wanna say hi to my friends?”

Shadow yawned and rolled over, exposing her fluffy tummy.

“You’re gonna love Lottie, she’s obsessed with cats. And spiders.”

Kat got up to her feet and grabbed a bottle of Aperol and oranges, glancing over to where her phone was. Lucas hasn’t replied yet, and she tried to reason with herself that he’s just probably with a client and isn’t mad with her.

When she took Lucas to see Bobby in Glasgow last week, it turned into a shitstorm, and all three of them silently agreed not to talk about it. There were a lot of things all three of them silently agreed not to talk about…

Priya and Lottie stormed into the kitchen, scaring Shadow under the counter.

“OMG, you’ve got a cat!” Lottie squealed, kneeling to look under the counter. “Hey, baby…”

“Wow, I’ve never seen Lottie this sweet,” Priya smirked and pushed herself up to sit on the countertop. “If Chelsea ever sees your place, she’s bound to have an interior decorating orgasm, I’m telling you.”

Kat chuckled and handed Priya a drink.

“Your cat is adorable, Kat,” Lottie gathered Shadow in her arms and slowly got up. “Can I come round to play with her, pleaaaase?”

“Any time,” Kat smiled. “She’ll love it. She usually pretends she’s too independent to hang out with the humans, but she secretly lives for attention.”

Lottie lowered the cat back on the floor and took the glass from Kat’s hands.

“Girls on tour?” She grinned as they clicked glasses.

“I’m so jealous of you two,” Priya admitted. “I wish I could move here and spend all the time with you guys.”

“You know, you can always dump Noah and marry me,” Kat smiled at the older girl and bumped her gently with her hip. “How’s Noah, actually?”

“Well, his family isn’t really thrilled that he’s moving to Manchester,” Priya admitted. “But he’s got an offer to take a Junior English professor position and finish his doctorate, and he’s pretty excited to become a professor.”

Lottie’s face lit up with a huge grin.

“So, now you’ll gonna wear one of those pleated skirts and…”

Kat pressed her hand to Lottie’s mouth.

“Ignore her. I’m really happy for you and Noah, Prius. You two are perfect, and even more perfect together.”

Lottie nodded, and Kat released her grip.

“Agree. I think I’m hearing wedding bells.”

Priya’s cheeks flushed red, and she slowly took a few sips before speaking.

“I’m really happy. I never knew it was actually possible to be so happy with someone, every day I wake up and I can’t believe my own luck.”

Kat’s gaze wandered to Lottie just in time to spot a gleam of sadness in her green eyes. She still didn’t know what had happened between the blonde and Lucas, none of them seemed to be willing to talk about the other. It was a bit weird, considering that became good mates in the Villa.

_So, what had happened, then?_

“I think we should get going,” Priya looked at the elegant watch on her wrist. “First viewing is in less than an hour and since Kat decided we’re walking there… I remember, you once mentioned that your wardrobe is my wardrobe?”

Kat laughed and nodded, and Priya sprinted towards the walk-in closet.

“It was the first room she discovered,” Lottie grinned when they left alone. “This girl is a fashion maniac, and I think she should consider working in that industry.”

They both went quiet for a minute, finishing their drinks in silence. Kat picked a fallen orchid flower from the counter and twisted it in her fingers.

“Hey, Lo?”

Lottie looked at her, spotting the nervousness in the eyes of her best friend.

“Yeah?”

Kat wanted to ask about Lucas but stopped herself. If neither of them told her yet, that just meant they didn’t want to talk about it, and she had to respect that. It’s not like she was honest with them about most of the things in her life.

“I’m really glad you’re moving here.”

***

After a very exhausting afternoon of trooping around the city, taking pictures with random people on the streets and apartment viewing, Lottie decided to call it a day. They walked out of the townhouse in Chelsea and slowly walked towards Bobby’s bakery, located just a few blocks away.

“So?” Priya inquired impatiently. “What do you think?”

“I think…” Lottie repeated slowly, tapping her finger on her chin. “I think that I’ll be living ten minutes from the best bakery in town.”

Priya’s loud squeal deafened half of the street as she wrapped her arms around the blonde girl.

“I’m so excited for you! I-I’m gonna call the agent right now, so we’ll meet him first thing tomorrow morning.”

“She’s so excited for you,” Kat lowered herself onto the stairs of one of the townhouses and patted the space next to her.

Lottie looked at the stairs suspiciously.

“Do people in New York just sit on someone else’s porches all the time?”

“Pretty much,” Kat chuckled, straightening the skirt of her silk slip-on dress.

“Do you miss it?”

She couldn’t answer that. She missed the city every fucking day, but it meant nothing. She chose to move here, she almost ran away. It was her choice, her decision, and she was happy with it – at least, she did not regret it.

But sometimes, she just wanted to close her eyes and wake up in New York.

“Sometimes,” She responded finally. “But I like it here.”

Lottie nodded.

“I get it. I miss Australia, but I’m glad I moved to the UK.”

They leaned into one another, resting against each other’s shoulders. This was one of the reasons Kat barely talked to people about herself: just a simple question could kick the ground from under her feet, and she fucking hated it. She hated the way she was, the way everyone saw her, and the way she saw herself.

Sometimes, she just hated herself and couldn’t help it.

“Okay, all settled,” Priya informed, turning to the girls. “We’re meeting the guy tomorrow at ten, at the office. Kat’s coming with us since they need a letter of recommendation, and let’s be real, Kat lives in probably the most expensive building in this town, she’s the perfect reference.”

“Why, thank you,” Kat dramatically placed her hand to her chest. “Such an honor!”

Laughing, they moved down the street until they were finally outside Bobby’s bakery.

“Oh hey, he’s got customers already!” Lottie pointed at the window.

Kat followed her gaze and rolled her eyes so hard, her head hurt.

“They’re not customers,” She grabbed the door handle and pushed it open, startling the group of people inside.

“Kat!” Bobby beamed, closing the space between them with a kiss, and her body finally relaxed, wrapped into his arms.

Lottie cleared her throat.

“Lola!” Bobby rushed to hug her and Priya. “Prius!”

A soft female voice with a light accent broke the moment.

“I see, Bobby still has no manners.”

Lottie pulled away a little to take a look at the girl in front of her. Soft, platinum blonde hair, large blue eyes, bright red lips, and full-on party dress at barely six in the evening… Kat saw the moment everything clicked in witch’s head.

Lottie’s eyes darted to Kat, and before the redhead could introduce them, she stepped forward.

“Bobby, would you introduce us to your _friends_?” She emphasized the last word, holding Oksana’s gaze with her suddenly ice-cold eyes.

“This is Lottie and Priya,” Bobby’s arm snaked around Kat’s waist. “This is Oksana, Giorgos, and Sasha, my manager.”

“Giorgos and Oksana stepped by to thank Bobby for the tarts he made for Giorgos’ event last night,” Sasha explained.

“Though technically, I’m Kat’s friend,” Greek smirked. “Or better, a friend of a family?”

Kat smiled at him, and a little petty side of her enjoyed the way Oksana’s lips twitched just a little at Giorgos calling her and Bobby a family.

“Are you guys together?” Priya chimed in, looking between Giorgos and Oksana with the sweetest smile. “You look so great together!”

Giorgos laughed softly.

“Well, thank you. How do you guys know Kat?”

“From the show,” Lottie’s eyes kept following Oksana. “How do you guys know each other?”

Bobby rested his chin on Kat’s shoulder, and his free hand started running up and down her arm, sending little tingles over her skin.

“We both went to UCL. Katherine was the star in her year and I… well, not so much,” Giorgos laughed.

“I’ve missed you today,” Bobby whispered into Kat’s ear, and his hand slipped down from her waist and came to rest on her hip. “I love this dress, by the way.”

Kat tilted her head and looked up in his amber eyes, now a shade darker than usual.

“Really?”

She caught his other hand and entwined their fingers and then rested both of their hands on her thigh. Bobby’s body pressed against hers was warm and protective, and his smell enveloped her into a sweet and fresh embrace.

“You smell minty,” Kat noted.

“I’ve been trying new recipes,” Bobby smiled against her hair. “You’ll love it.”

Both of them lost the thread of conversation, too consumed with one another to notice anything else. Bobby felt Kat’s body finally relaxing against his and let out a happy sigh: knowing that he was the one she needed to feel comfortable meant everything to him. She needed him just as much as he needed her, and it was the best damn feeling in the world.

“…move here,” Lottie’s last words snapped the couple out of their haze.

“Right!” Bobby yelped a bit too loud. “I didn’t get a chance to ask if Lola found her dream flat yet!”

His words were met with a few chuckles and amused looks.

“What?” Bobby pouted. “What’s so funny?”

“I’ve been rambling about this flat I liked for the last five minutes,” Lottie smirked.

“That’s why Kat isn’t allowed to any business meetings,” Sasha prompted. “When she’s around, Bobby can only see and hear her, and it’s hella distractive.”

Giorgos looked at the redhead amused and nodded.

“Sounds just like Kat.”

She slightly tilted her head and shrugged, spotting poorly covered annoyance in bright blue eyes.

“It is what it is, fellas.”

“Anyways, we’re bound to go,” Priya chimed in, glancing at Kat. “This star of a woman promised us a fun London night-out, and I’m taking her up on her offer.”

“Where’re you going?” Giorgos wondered. “No, lemme guess. Aviary first, then Barts and finish the night at Tramp?”

Kat laughed softly and shook her head.

“Can’t lie, the Zodiac room sounds tempting right about now, but no.”

“Killing Kittens, then?”

“Killing what?” Bobby chocked.

Priya’s eye widened with realization.

“Is that… the sex club?”

“It might be.”

Giorgos laughed and reached over to clasp Bobby’s shoulder.

“Be warn, young man, this one only looks like a delicate flower.”

Oksana rolled her eyes and tugged on Giorgos' hand.

“We should go, remember? We got a reservation at The Square.”

“Oi, nonsense!” Bobby waved his hand dismissively. “We should all hang out together. And don’t say you’ve got stuff to do in the morning,” He turned to Sasha with a pointed look. “Your boss is giving you a day off.”

“Well, if you put it like that…”

Priya’s hand found Kat’s and squeezed it gently.

“Would you show me to the ladies’ room?”

Kat nodded and wiggled in Bobby’s arms, but he only tightened his grip.

“Bobby,” She whispered softly, and he released her with a groan of protest.

Priya waited until they were out of earshot before she turned to Kat. Redhead looked as if she was fine, but the older girl was way more observant than people gave her credit for. Her friend wasn’t okay, even though she worked hard to make it seem like she was. Priya had learned not to worry her with questions, but she couldn’t help her need to make sure Kat knows she can talk to her whenever she’s ready to.

“Hey,” Priya caught Kat’s hand as they stopped before the bathroom door. “Are you okay with us all hanging out together?”

Kat shrugged and leaned her back against the wall as if she was too tired to stand straight and needed to get a purchase on something. She absolutely did not think it was a good idea, but Bobby and Giorgos seemed to be hitting it off well, and she wasn’t about to kill this new friendship – not after she became the reason Bobby had lost the majority of his friends.

“It’s fine, Pri,” Kat made a week attempt at a smile.

“I don’t like that Russian matryoshka,” Priya scowled. “She wasn’t much pleased to hear how solid you and Bobby are.”

_Yeah, you can say that again._

“It’s really nothing. I mean, most of the girls' Bobby speaks to aren’t exactly thrilled about the fact of my existence.”

Sometimes, Kat wondered how it happened, that Bobby stayed single up until now. Girls flew to him like moths attracted by a roaring fire – and yet, he somehow didn’t know how amazing he was.

“What about that Greek guy? Giorgos – it’s Greek, right?”

“Yeah, his mom is from Athens,” Kat nodded. “What about him?”

“He seems like he knows you well enough.”

“He _knew_ me,” Kat shrugged. “We used to hang out a lot when I just started my undergrad. Then, he went to Greece and lived there for a few years, and he moved back to London last year. By that time, we didn’t have much in common anymore.”

“So, when you say hanged out…”

Kat rolled her eyes: of course, Priya couldn’t miss the fact Giorgos wasn’t exactly subtle talking about her wilder days, and all those smiles and glances…

“We’ve slept together a few times.”

“Does Bobby know?”

“Well, I didn’t really have a chance to insert this little fun-fact into our conversation last night, and it seemed like a weird topic to discuss during morning… coffee.”

“Morning coffee?”

“Shut up.”

“So, he didn’t ask you how you know the guy?”

“Geez, Priya. Bobby knows I’m hardly a virgin, and it’s not like I’ve asked him about his exes. Does it really matter who slept with who five years ago?”

Priya studied Kat’s face for a long minute and then nodded, still clearly unconvinced. Talking about her past with Giorgos would lead up to talking about Bobby’s past with Oksana, and Kat wasn’t exactly looking forward to that conversation. This was all in the past now, whether Russian girl liked it or not, she was a part of Bobby’s history, nothing more.

 _But she’s trying to steal his attention_ , Kat’s inner voice whispered, and she almost winced. _Just like all of them, she wants him to spend his time with her, not with you._

“Kat,” Priya’s voice snapped her out of her thoughts. “Just know that I’m here for you, okay? Me, Lottie, Chelsea, Gary, Rahim, everyone. We all love you.”

“Lucas,” Kat blurted out before she could stop herself.

“Lucas?”

_Lucas is always there for me, and I ditched him to spend time with Bobby’s fuckin teenage dream._

Priya’s face changed a little before she took control over it.

“I’m sure, he’d told you the same. We just all want you and Bobby to be happy.”

 _No, Lucas wants_ me _to be happy._

That was the difference, both in the Villa and on the outside. Lottie and Priya weren’t _only_ her friends, they really cared about Bobby – and sometimes, it felt like they cared about him in a way they didn’t care about her. Priya was a little less than Lottie, but still. Kat felt guilty for thinking this way, but she just couldn’t help it.

She still remembered how they all went out of their way to help Bobby to get with her, and none of them even thought of telling her about Bobby’s feelings, as if they were afraid that she’ll hurt him. And then, everyone felt this need to protect him from her when Jared arrived…

Only Lucas was there for her, caring _only_ for _her._

Kat knew that he and Bobby grew closer in the last few days in the Villa, but ultimately, Lucas was _hers_ only. And she should’ve insisted on him joining them tonight. Fuck, she should’ve just _asked_ him to come.

She barely noticed that Priya disappeared in a bathroom and only snapped out of her trance when the older girl waved her hand just an inch from her face.

“Hey!” Kat shuddered.

“You got lost in thoughts, again.”

Lately, it was her usual state of mind. Whenever she started thinking about something – anything – she just got consumed by her own thoughts and snapping out of this flux was getting harder with each passing day. Yesterday was her last official session with Dr. Lang, who recommended Kat to continue their sessions. Surely, she politely recommended him to screw himself and scheduled an appointment with her regular therapist, Dr. Wright.

She didn’t tell Bobby, he was already a bit worried about her, so she just told him her sessions with the show hired therapist were done with. She didn’t mean to lie but… but it was easier this way. Right now, Bobby knew she had depression. It was just a plain fact, not much behind it.

Telling him that she’s going back into therapy – and with that, she’s going back to her medications – was equal to admitting that nothing is fine with her, and Kat wasn’t ready for him to know that. He had too much on his plate already, she just couldn’t let him be more worried about her than he already was.

“You’re ready?”

Priya sighed and nodded: Kat closed on her, and now it was absolutely pointless to continue this conversation.

“Let’s join the circus, then.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A


	6. Trading yesterday.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kat's singing Can't Fight This Feeling -Sophie Ellis Bextor

'“To all new friends!” Giorgos raised his glass, and everyone followed his lead.

Kat brought them to the bar she used to go to when she didn’t want to meet anyone she knew. It was a trendy but cheap hipster place, and the usual crowd here were social media influencers and aspiring writers – and she was sure as hell none of the people she knew would go to a place like this.

When Giorgos started naming all those places back at the bakery, she almost changed her mind and took them to this new fancy restaurant – but stopped herself. Girls’ reaction to her apartment was painful enough, she didn’t want to overwhelm them completely. If it was just the four of them, she wouldn’t contemplate for even a second, but with Sasha, Giorgos and Oksana in a mix, she had no idea what to expect from this evening.

She pulled out her personal phone and check her messages: no reply from Lucas.

She fought back a frown and put her phone on the table, screen down, and joined Lottie and Priya for a ‘girl gang’ photo.

“Perfect,” Lottie sent Giorgos a smile. “You take good bad pics.”

“How’s that?” He looked at her, amused.

“My hair’s a mess and the lighting here is off, but I still look hot as hell,” Lottie slightly cocked her eyebrow at him, and Giorgos laughed. “I appoint you our photo guru of the nigh.”

“Wow, such an honor, Charlotte.”

Priya elbowed Kat and leaned loser to whisper:

“They’re not really subtle, are they?”

“I’m surprised Oksana isn’t throwing things at him yet,” Kat sighed. “He’s been always like that.”

“Even when he was with you?”

“He wasn’t with me. I told you, we’ve slept a few times, that is. He was dating this Dutch girl at the time, so yeah… probably, better tell Lottie before late.”

Bobby’s hand brushed her leg under the table and came to rest on her thigh as he leaned closer as if to refill her glass.

“Would the two of you stop whispering?”

Kat felt her blood start boiling and almost shook his hand off when his fingers suddenly slipped under her dress.

“So, Kat,” Oksana’s voice made her almost jump at her seat. “What do you do now, that you’re famous?”

Next to her, Priya gasped a little at this backhanded comment, but redhead just smiled politely.

“I’m still in med school.”

“So, what’s your major, Oksana?” Priya wondered innocently, sipping on her martini.

Kat barely managed to hide a smile turning the corners of her mouth slightly up and took a sip, too. Bobby’s hand came into motion as the girls interrogated Oksana about her time in college.

His fingertips moved upwards slightly, brushing the inner side teasingly, as he added something to the conversation. Sasha laughed at his comment and asked Oksana about Moscow, where he hadn’t been since he was ten.

Redhead cut her eyes to look at her boyfriend: his neck and cheeks were bright pink as if he sprinted for a mile, but he continued moving his hand until it touched the silk fabric of her underwear. She could swear he let out a sigh of disappointment, and smirked, finally catching his eyes.

Casually, she shifted on her chair, giving him better access, and his fingers pulled the fabric aside, now touching her bare skin. Kat pressed her elbows against the table, sliding to the edge of her seat, and one of Bobby’s fingers slid inside of her, making her eyes widen at this sudden _fulness_.

“What do you think?”

Sasha looked at her expectedly, and Kat could swear she heard Bobby’s chuckle – little fuck enjoyed the fact she wasn’t even trying to follow the conversation.

“What do I think?” She repeated, and Bobby added another finger, almost making her choke on air.

“About London,” Lottie prompted.

“I’ve heard the question,” Kat lied, controlling her breath as the fingers inside of her curled upwards. “It’s just… well, if I didn’t like it here, I wouldn’t have lived here for six years, right?”

“Good save,” Bobby whispered into her ear, shifting closer to her.

His thumb started circling her clit, and she almost let a moan escape her mouth.

Usually, she was the one doing things like this: fucking Bobby in a back alley behind the pub, while his friends were there, waiting for him. Jerking him off on an airplane. Sucking him dry in a back room behind the stage, five minutes before press-conference. She just couldn’t get enough of him, and of the way he needed her. He needed her so hard, he was almost breaking every time she touched him, and it was her own personal drug, he was her fix, and she was addicted.

It was dark and loud enough to keep the attention off of them, and for a few minutes, it was just him and her.

Bobby’s wrist started hurting, and he shifted on his chair, accidentally pushing the table.

“Bobby!” Priya squealed.

“Sorry!” His face went into even a darker shade of red as everyone stared at him. “I was just…”

He couldn’t finish his sentence, as Kat suddenly sucked his fingers deeper inside of her, clamping and pulsing around them, and his eyes went wide. His own dick was throbbing in his constrictive jeans, and he almost groaned at the sensation of her climax that almost sent him over the edge, too. 

“You alright?” Giorgos frowned with concern. “You went red in your face, it might be blood-pressure.”

_No fucking kidding._

“I’m… good,” Bobby breathed out. “Shots?”

“Oh, don’t mind if I do,” Lottie grinned.

“You’re a saint,” Priya smiled at him.

“B right b,” Bobby carefully slipped his fingers out of Kat and raised his eyebrows at her. “You coming?”

A devilish smiled curled her lips.

“Yeah, I’m coming.”

Bobby rolled his eyes, found her hand under the table, and put it on the bulge in his jeans.

“Let’s go grab those shots,” She chuckled and stood up first, creating a wall between him and the others, covering the fact that he was hard as hell.

They moved through the crowd until they reached the stairs, and Kat tugged on his hand, making Bobby follow her downstairs. There was just a little space under the staircase, and he looked suspiciously at the girl.

“What?” She pushed him against the wall, unzipping his jeans. “They don’t have private restrooms here.”

Her fingers wrapped around his length, and he let out a soft moan.

“How do you want me?” She asked softly, tracing a path of kisses down his neck.

Wordless, he flipped their positions and pressed his mouth against Kat’s. Her lips parted the same moment, letting his tongue roam her mouth, as his hands slipped under her dress, rolling it up until it was above her breasts. With a groan, he caught one of her nipples between his teeth, and she pressed his head harder against her chest, and he sucked her sensitive bud into his mouth, circling it with his tongue.

Her hand on his dick moved faster, squeezing him roughly, drawing growls out of him.

“Turn around.”

His voice was low and husky, and he was barely asking. She did as he said, pressing her hands against the wall, arching her back, and bucked her hips back, pressing her ass into him.

He grabbed one of her hands and put it on the small of her back, making her hold the skirt of her dress so it was out of his way, and pulled the fabric of her knickers aside. His eyes followed from the back of her neck down her back, with such a deep arc he could place there a champagne flute, and then to her perfect ass.

His fingers dug deeper into her skin as she spread her legs further apart and looked at him over her shoulder.

“Am I a new tv-show? Stop gawking and fuck me already.”

He pulled her hair and lined himself up to her, and she bucked her hips back, taking him all in, drawing a law groan out of him. She didn’t let herself any time to adjust and started moving the same moment, pressing herself into him with each thrust.

It was dark but Bobby could still see his cock sliding in and out of her, and for a second, he’d forgotten everything but this sight.

“Would you start moving already, please?” She asked in between uneven breaths. “I like fucking you, but I want you to fuck me, too.”

She was rarely a talker, and for a second Bobby wondered why she’s being suddenly vocal tonight. And then, he pounded into her, again and again, until his eyes fell close, and a million pretty lights explode under his eyelids.

Kat twisted her body and pressed his face against her shoulder to keep him quiet as he exploded deep inside of her, moving hastily, riding out his relief. His climax sent her body into trembles, and Bobby’s hand moved from her hip to circle her clit, sending her over the edge almost the second he touched her.

She was the quiet one in their couple, but this time she had to bite down on her wrist.

Bobby swore into her shoulder as her walls clenched around him, sending a bolt of electricity down his spine, sending him into overdrive.

Slowly, she came down from her high and turned to face him, leaning her back against the wall for stability, and he spotted a new look in her eyes that he hadn’t seen there before: emptiness. It was there for just a split of a second and disappeared completely as his girlfriend smirked at him.

“You’re so hot.”

She hit him with stuff like this all the time, but Bobby still blushed like a fucking schoolgirl every time she paid him a compliment. Even now, after banging her under the staircase, his cheeks flushed red at her words.

“I look like shit now though,” Kat patted her hair with a sigh. “Go back, I’ll be right behind.”

“I still have to order those shots,” Bobby reminded her.

“I’ll take care of that, just tell them it’s coming.”

Unnoticed, they returned to the main level, and Kat slipped into the ladies’ room, now seemingly empty. She looked herself up and down in the mirror and damped her hair a bit to straighten her wild curls just as much. Thankfully, she wasn’t wearing any makeup but Lottie’s mascara, and she splashed her face with cold water to cool it down.

She felt it.

_Nothing._

Back under the stairs, she felt the absolute emptiness. It was just for a split of a second, it just skimmed past her, but she fucking felt it, and it scared her. If she lets it take over her, again, she’ll lose everything, she knew it. She’ll lose Bobby, and this lost she wouldn’t survive.

She stared at her reflection, trying to spot any changes.

She looked the same, just a little rattled.

Maybe, she’s imagining things? Maybe it’s just her subconscious playing games with her? She’s scared to slip into the void and so her anxiety tricks her into thinking that she felt a certain way?

That must be it.

There’s no chance she’d felt empty after being with Bobby, it’s just her imagination, nothing more.

Kat took a deep breath and stepped out of the ladies’ room and headed towards the bar, an idea forming in her brain as she approached the bartender with a half-smile that could win the hardest of hearts.

“All ready,” Young man smiled at her a few minutes later. “Drinks on the table, mic, and speakers are set up and ready to go, we just had a karaoke night yesterday and never had time to remove the setup.”

Kat climbed the stage at the first accords and looked around.

“Oh em gee!” Priya squealed, nudging Bobby painfully on a shoulder. “Look, it’s Kat!”

Bobby followed her gaze, and his lips stretched into a grin. She really was there, standing alone at the stage, smiling softly at him.

She could hear their loud whistles, shouting and applause, and leaned closer to the mic to speak through the intensifying music level.

“They’re not with me,” Kat smirked, flipping her hair over her shoulder. “I’ve no idea who these people are.”

She blew a kiss when Lottie started filming her and shut her eyes close for a second before snapping them open in-sync with the music.

_“…Standing in a crowded room  
But all I see is you  
Like a spotlight follows where you are…”_

Her eyes locked with Bobby’s, and she could physically sense waves of warmth coming from his body, guiding her through the night. Whenever she felt overwhelmed, she searched for him in the crowd. Whenever she entered the room, he saw nobody else but her, and when she wasn’t around, his world wasn’t complete.

_“…Do you know I never want to leave your side  
Desire swallows up my pride  
I can't say no, I want you,  
So I've got to see this through…”_

She still sometimes woke up in the middle of a night, panting, from the same dream: like she was back in the Villa, and she never got together with Bobby. She still couldn’t believe it took her so long to understand her feeling for him – and it took her even longer to accept those feelings. And even now she felt this irrational fear of what might've been if she never admitted that she fell in love with her best friend. She knew it was just her anxiety playing tricks on her, and that nothing can change the fact that they _are_ together, but her mind just wouldn’t stop throwing ‘what ifs’ at her.

Sometimes, Bobby had to actually pinch himself just to make sure that he isn’t still on Love Island, daydreaming about his impossible future with the only woman he’d ever loved, the only woman he could ever love.

 _“…_ _'Cos I just can't fight this feeling_ _  
We should be lovers. ..”_

Kat ran her hand through her hair, just a simple little gesture, and Bobby’s heart fluttered inside his chest, growing bigger with each passing moment. He barely registered that someone told him something, and he blurted out something in response, without any idea if he’s actually saying words.

He loved her so much he was pretty sure he’d die if she ever leaves him.

 _“…_ _Falling on you took a moment_ _  
Your kiss charged my heart  
Just a touch could never be enough…”_

She couldn’t believe how easy it was, loving him. There was no pain, no fear, no doubt – only love. Her heart knew that never, not in this or any other life, he’d leave her. He was hers, every little cell in his body belonged to her.

Loving him made her complete, it made her whole.

 _“…Do you know I'm overboard and can't be saved?_ _  
I pray the night time makes me brave  
I have to show I want you  
So I've got to get to you…”_

She slowly moved towards their table, followed by dozens of pairs of eyes, and Bobby's chest swelled at the realization that it’s him who she picked. She wasn’t just choosing between him, Lucas, and that Jared guy – she was picking between him and the entire world, and it’s him who’s got to get her.

He must’ve done something really good in his previous life, maybe, saved a fucking continent – or maybe, he’s just the luckiest person on the planet.

Kat finally reached the table, eyes still locked on her baker, and she bent over it, tracing her fingers across his jawline gently. She just wanted him to finally see himself the way she saw him, so perfect she couldn’t sometimes believe he was real.

 _“…'Cos I just can't fight this feeling_ _  
We should be lovers._

_Now I just can't fight this feeling_

_My head is spinning. I think its winning…”_

She knew that she was the only one he wanted, and maybe this _knowledge_ was able to keep her jealousy at bay. She knew: as long as he has her, there’s no one else in the world that could even come close to him. She was his shield, the one he’s made for himself, the one that kept them both safe.

If she was a dream, Bobby wished to never wake up.

 _“No, I just can’t fight this feeling,_ _  
And it's beating me down…”_

Kat got back onto the stage to finish the song, and the bar erupted into applause.

“Thank you,” She smiled, fluttered. She wasn’t that much of a singer _but it’s just a karaoke, the effort is what really counts, right?_

Bobby caught her into his arms and pulled into a hug before she could even reach their table.

“I can’t believe you beat me to this,” Bobby whispered into her hair. “It’s on now, karaoke battle.”

“I’ll wipe the floor with you.”

Bobby pulled a little away and stared deeply into her eyes.

“Oh, please do, Kat.”

He kissed her deeply before she could reply, and there was suddenly not a single coherent thought in her brain, just the sensation of his lips against hers, and his fresh and sweet scent, filling up her lungs.

“I love you,” Bobby breathed out, so desperately as if he was in a rush to say these words. “I love you so fucking much I’m afraid I’ll go mad one day.”

“Haven’t you got the memo?” Kat pulled on a serious look before leaning over to whisper into his ear. “Mad fuck like a star.”

With that, she grabbed him by the hand and returned back to their table.

“I saved you a shot,” Priya slid a glass to her, and Kat threw it back without wincing. “Easy there, tiger.”

The older girl frowned a little and passed her another shot of tequila, which suffered the same faith. Kat’s elbow slipped off the table, and her phone landed on the floor.

She reached down to grab it and spotted a few new notifications.

**I saw Lottie’s story. I knew you’re a karaoke kind of girl.**

“Who’re you texting?” Priya looked over her shoulder. “Tell them I’ve monopolized you!”

Priya gave her a cuddle, and Kat laughed half-heartedly, typing in her reply.

**So, now you’re talking to me again?**

She erased the text: no, that’s too aggressive. He just hadn’t replied to one message.

**Lottie’s a fucking paparazzi. She posted that pigeon story earlier today and I swear she filmed a guy jerking off in his car.**

**I can’t unsee it now… My eyes need a relief, snes dudes.**

Kat snorted in laughter, attracting attention.

“What’s so funny?” Oksana glanced at the phone in Kat’s hand.

“Our friend. He’s such a sort.”

“Tell him I said ‘hi’,” Bobby smiled at her before returning to his conversation with Giorgos.

Lottie gave Kat a long look and then darted her eyes towards the exit door. Redhead followed her gaze and nodded.

When they got outside, Kat turned to face the blonde and spotted a look of uncertainty in her green eyes. She walked them both across the street, where she knew was a little boutique with a wide enough windowsill for both of them to seat on.

“You okay?”

“You were just texting Lucas, right?”

“Yeah,” Kat didn’t expect this question. “He said he saw your recent story, you know, of me embarrassing myself.”

Her joke fell flat as Lottie grazed her lip between her teeth.

“There’s something I need to tell you. I thought that Lucas might but then he didn’t and… well.”

Kat brushed her fingers across Lottie’s knee and squeezed it reassuringly. So, she was right, there was something weird going on between those two. Back in the Villa, they seemed pretty close, not romantically, but it looked like they were mates, and both enjoyed each other’s company.

And then, they were suddenly distant and wouldn’t meet eye to eye outside the show events.

“Me and Lucas… We’ve slept together,” Lottie rattled off. “I’m so sorry, I don’t know what the fuck I’ve been thinking about… god, Kat, I’m so fucking sorry.”

It took a moment for the new information to sink in.

They all just assumed Lucas and Lottie were only a friendship couple, and now it turned out… they weren’t?

“What?” Kat frowned, trying to articulate her thoughts correctly and failing, based on the look on Lottie’s face.

“It just happened the night we left the Villa, before the finale,” Blonde rushed to explain, tripping over her words. “I… we both regretted it the same moment, but we couldn’t tell you straight away, and then you and Bobby left and… fuck, I screwed up, again.”

Kat pressed her hand against Lottie’s mouth to shut her up.

“You’ve got nothing to apologize for,” She said firmly. “I knew there was something eating you up, I just wish you told me earlier, so I knew you weren’t fine.”

“You’re not mad?” The words came out muffled, and Kat removed her hand.

“No, why would I be? I just want you both to be happy… And that’s why I need to tell you something. About Giorgos.”

“Oh?”

Kat could see a bright red color spreading across goth’s cheeks the same second and sighed.

“He’s an ultimate douchelord. I don’t like the girl, but I feel sorry for Oksana for the way he treats her. He’s flirting with you right before her eyes, and it’s not all he does, trust me. He’s just… well, if you want just to hook-up with him, then you’ll be fine. But if you like him… Stay away from him, he’s not boyfriend material.”

Lottie’s eyes widened.

“You and Giorgos?”

“’ve slept a few times. He dated someone else at the time. I just want you to be careful around him, okay?”

Lottie nodded and rested her head against Kat’s shoulder.

“You really not mad?”

“No,” Kat placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. “Thanks for telling me, Lo.”

Lottie recomposed herself and got to her feet.

“Let’s go back?”

“I-I need a moment, okay? I’ll be right behind.”

The other girl gave her a long studying look and then nodded and left her alone. Kat waited until Lottie vanished inside the bar and pressed her head against the store window. Now, everything made perfect sense. The way Lucas acted when she spoke about Lottie, and how rattled he was when she saw him last week…

She looked at the phone in her hand and pressed ‘call’, expecting him to ignore her call just like he ignored her text, but he picked up after just one ring.

“Hey,” His voice sounded strained.

“Hey,” Kat sighed, relieved that he’s still willing to talk. “I’ve missed you today.”

There was a long silence on the other end before Lucas finally sighed.

“I know that Lottie told you. She just texted me.”

“I should’ve guessed,” Kat shook her head, annoyed. “You’ve ignored me for hours and suddenly picked up after the first ring.”

“I- I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to ignore you,” His voice broke a little. “I was just being petty, about not seeing you tonight.”

Kat sighed. Now that she knew why he didn’t want to spend his weekend with the others, she couldn’t be angry with him. Surely, it’d be weird for both him and Lottie.

“I’m sorry, too. I knew something wasn’t right. I should’ve asked.”

Lucas’ bitter laughter filled her ears.

“That’s my Kat. You can’t be sorry for the things I’ve done, kitten.”

“I just… I wish you were here, that is.”

Her voice trembled with sudden tears, and Kat wiped them off, surprised by her own reaction.

“Wanna hear something funny?”

“Astound me.”

“You remember the first few episodes you watched before you and Henrik arrived, right?”

“Yup.”

“Well, then you should remember Bobby’s little story about that Russian girl he’d met at a bar and hooked up with six years ago.”

“Not sure if I should, but I remember.”

“Well, now, that exact girl is sitting across the table from Bobby.”

She felt some kind of twisted joy when her words were followed by the dead silence. Lucas clearly swallowed his tongue, and it was weirdly satisfying.

“Are you astound?” Kat chuckled darkly.

“What… how’d it happened?”

“We literally stumbled into her last night in my friend Giorgos gallery. And today, me, Lottie and Priya stepped by the bakery to pick Bobby up, and the precious couple was there. Bobby invited them and his manager to join our little party.”

“He did what?” Lucas sputtered.

“He was being a Bobby,” Kat felt relieved at being finally able to say this out loud.

“That’s fucked up. I’m sorry I wasn’t there with you.”

She could hear the change in his tone of voice, so many emotions were running through his veins right now, she could just _hear_ it. She knew she could say anything to him, and he won’t judge her for that. He wouldn’t try to calm her down and wouldn’t tell her that she had nothing to be worried about, that Bobby wants only her.

She knew all that.

Lucas already said the only thing she needed to hear: that sitting at the same table with her boyfriend’s ex hook-up wasn’t right. Sure, Lottie and Priya thought the same but… they both had a soft spot for her baker, and they will always make excuses for him.

“Kat?” Lucas' voice snapped her out of her thoughts.

“Yeah?”

“Next time when I’m being a petty jerk… Find a way to knock some sense into me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A


	7. Adore, Adore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "With your feet on the air and your head on the ground  
> Try this trick and spin it..."
> 
> [Where Is My Mind - Pixies]

“Kat,” Bobby’s voice reached her from the haze of her half-sleep half-trance, and she cracked her eyes open. “It’s almost ten, we have to be at the studio in an hour.”

She groaned and buried her face in the silk pillowcase.

“I don’t want to go either, but it’s the last group interview. _We_ have to be there.”

“ _You_ have to be there, _you_ won that stupid show.”

Redhead felt his hand as it made its way under the duvet and was now caressing her leg, and immediately her insides curled into tight knots with desire.

“Is there anything I can do to… _persuade_ you?” Bobby’s voice went a bit lower as his hand traveled up Kat’s leg and brushed her thigh.

She propped herself on the elbows to watch Bobby as he slowly pushed the duvet aside, and immediately her naked body prickled with goosebumps from the cold air, and the stare of Bobby’s darkened eyes. Maintaining their eye contact, he took hold of her ankle and brought her foot to his lips, tracing his tongue sluggishly across her sole and then bit lightly on her big toe, before swirling his tongue around it.

Her breath stuttered at the sensation, but she didn’t let a single muscle in her body move, consumed by the picture of Bobby’s lips wrapped around her toe.

An old joke now wasn’t that funny anymore.

His free hand traveled up and down her leg, kneading her muscles and melting away some of the tension left by the restless night. She could barely sleep lately; her mind was constantly racing as if trying to catch that fucking speed of the sound. Sometimes, she didn’t have any idea what she’d been thinking about for hours and would snap out of her trance with the first glimpses of morning sunlight.

Bobby’s mouth slowly traveled from her foot to her calf, now both of his hands threading her muscles. He slouched closer to her, and she felt the warmth of his naked body slowly sinking into her, warming her up from withing.

She fought back an urge to wrap him with her legs and pull her baker boy closer and just continued watching his hands.

“Roll onto your stomach,” Bobby instructed with a sudden firmness that sent little jolts of electricity down Kat’s spine.

Switching their roles was always fun, and she loved it when Bobby told her what to do… but she also couldn’t deprive herself of the satisfaction of teasing him. Slowly, she rolled her shoulders, pushing herself up. Her messy curls cascaded down her shoulders and back, one strand fell onto her face, and she brushed it away slowly, _accidentally_ tracing her finger over her parted lips.

Bobby’s stuttered breath was her reward when she finally sat up in front of him, and his eyes couldn’t decide where to look. Deliberately, she moved aside to stand on her knees and then turned her back to him, tossing her hair. She could feel Bobby’s stare, his eyes were burning holes in her body as she leaned down, pressing her hands into the mattress and arching her back like a cat.

“F-fuck, Kat-“

Bobby’s voice was raspy and strained, and she couldn’t hold back a tiny grin as she finally took the position.

Bobby recomposed himself and threw his leg over Kat’s, straddling her thighs. Both of them gasped when his hard cock bumped against her ass, and it took all of his self-control not to rub against her. He wanted to help her with her morning blues, wanted her to relax after a restless night, to just enjoy herself.

 _Too bad I’m not Lucas,_ Bobby frowned to himself. _I bet he gives the best massages… would it be weird if he gave her a massage when he’s here?_

His hands kneaded her shoulders firmly, and soon, Kat was breathing deeply, her body almost weightless under Bobby’s hands, and he felt a warm wave of relief spreading over his body. He hated seeing her so… broken, he wanted – needed – to fix her. He’d do whatever just to bring back that smile if hers he saw on their first day on the show, so… genuine.

Now, she barely smiled, and when she did, it was her ‘polite’ smile, that never touched her eyes. There was another smile, the one reserved for him, the one that went straight into his heart – but he wanted the entire world to see the beauty that her happiness was, he couldn’t stand the thought of her being so… unhappy.

She really tried to keep her dark side away from him, Bobby knew it.

Kat moved a little under him, and Bobby snapped out of his thoughts returning his attention back into the room. She propped up on her elbow and was now watching him over her shoulder. Her emerald green eyes were now ablaze, and he immediately got caught into its web. drawn to her beyond any limits.

With whatever remains of self-control that he still possessed Bobby arched an eyebrow at her.

“You’ve got something to say?” He asked her almost casually, stroking her sides with the tips of his fingers.

Kat considered his words and shook her head.

“Great. Now, get up, take a shower, and do it in five minutes.”

His own body screamed against it, he was painfully hard, but they couldn’t miss that fucking interview. Without saying a word, she pushed herself up, making Bobby roll over, and walked to the shower, leaving the door open.

“Fuck.”

Bobby got up to his feet and walked slowly towards the bathroom and stopped in the doorway, watching redhead as she gathered her hair in a high bun and grabbed her toothbrush before stepping into the shower stall. The walls were completely transparent, and even through the steam Bobby could see her clearly.

His dick twitched when she suddenly leaned her back against the tile wall and slipped her hand down her body until it was between her legs.

His heart skipped a few beats and then hammered in his chest as she looked at him through the glass, touching herself with one hand and brushing her teeth with another. Somehow, this was the last drop for him. With a low, feral growl he pulled the shower door open and stepped inside, pulling Kat closer roughly.

He was a fool to think that he could resist her. Any self-control that he had before was gone now, the only thing left was his unquenchable, insatiable yearning for her, that grew bigger with each passing day. Never in his life, he needed anything this fucking hard as he needed her right now.

She dropped to her knees before him a split of a second before he could’ve pushed her down, and took him into her mouth completely, drawing a loud moan out of him. Bobby’s head lolled back, and hot streams of water filled his nose and open mouth, almost asphyxiating him.

Blindly, he found a showerhead and turned it toward the wall, so the water couldn’t reach them, and looked down just to meet Kat’s wild eyes. His hips bucked into her face involuntarily as he saw those eyes, looking back at him while her mouth continued working him, drawing groans and whimpers out of him.

His hands found the wall behind him, as Bobby desperately searched for something to get a purchase on, and he leaned against it, not trusting his legs completely. She drove him insane, there was nothing he wouldn’t do for her, and it was terrifying. The way she made him feel, he wasn’t sure the human’s heart was meant to feel _this_ strong. Sometimes, he felt so much that his chest hurt, and his heart jumped up to his throat as if trying to leave his body.

She swallowed around his cock, and a million pretty lights exploded in Bobby’s head, and his eyes squeezed shut involuntarily as he let a growl of almost painful relief escape his mouth. She caressed his thighs gently with her hands, as he thrust hastily into her mouth, riding out his orgasm.

Before his body stopped trembling, Bobby grabbed the girl roughly by her shoulders making her stand up and kissed her so hard it felt more like a crash than a kiss. She answered immediately, biting down on his lower lip ferociously, and Bobby felt blood mixed with his own taste on her tongue.

His hand slid down between their bodies and slipped between her legs intrusively. He had no idea what time it was and if they were already late, he just needed to feel her come, crying his name out, and this need overweighed everything else in the world. He just _needed_ her relief, maybe more than he needed his own.

She gasped under his touch, hard and fast, and threw her head back. He took it as an advantage and leaned over to start kissing and biting exposed skin, so soft and smooth, so perfect, so _loved_. He loved every inch of her skin, every curve of her body, every little birthmark, every little scar that Shadow gave her.

And he fucking loved the way her mouth opened in a desperate moan when she tightened up around his fingers and rolled her hips, sucking him deeper inside of her. Bobby curled his fingers inside of her, and she combusted immediately, pulsing and clenching, and making him feel like he’d just came with her.

His own body, his everything was connected to something inside of her, making him feel whatever she’s been feeling at the moment, and it was impossible to explain, and he wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world. He just wanted to become one with her, never in his life spend a second separated from her, he needed her so fucking much he was powerless against this desperate need. He was so greedy of her, he wanted her just to himself.

Kat recomposed herself and gave Bobby a cheeky wink.

“I won’t be able to dress myself with your fingers inside of me.”

Bobby blushed furiously and slowly slipped his fingers out of her, watching her face to spot any signs of previous aloofness. She raised an eyebrow at him and tentatively leaned closer in to whisper into his ear sultry.

“Though, I wouldn’t mind spending my day with your hand between my legs.”

She pushed him aside, climbed out of the shower leaving Bobby alone, grabbed a towel, and walked into the closet, leaving a wet trail behind herself. Bobby was right, they couldn’t miss that last interview, it was too important now when it was just two days until the bakery opening.

Giorgos was of huge help with the guest list, and the final version was filled with business owners mixed with the press, Instagram celebrities, and London in-circle crowd. It was more than any other bakery in town could’ve dreamt of, but Kat still felt like she could’ve done more.

_If only I wasn’t a pathetic little shit._

She picked an off-white jumpsuit and an oversized off-shoulder sweater and pulled it on, hoping that it wouldn’t fit too loosely. She’d dropped a few pounds in the last couple of weeks, because of the meds her therapist prescribed.

Kat opened her purse and fished out one of the pills and swallowed it a moment before Bobby walked into the closet. She hastily shoved the container back into bag and turned to her boyfriend, studying his body.

There was a dark purple bruise in the hollow of his collarbone, and she stepped towards Bobby to run her fingers over it.

“You look so damn hot with my marks all over your body.”

Bobby’s breath stuttered under her touch.

“Do you want to make me hard again?” He asked casually, but his face flushed red.

“Always.”

Kat chuckled and pushed him away.

“Why are you such a slowpoke? I’ve been waiting for you forever!”

“Har har,” Bobby huffed. “You’re so funny.”

He grabbed a pair of white ripped jeans and a grey t-shirt.

“This okay?” He showed it to Kat, and she nodded, picking a jacket for him. “It’s not that cold for a jacket.”

“It will look better with a jacket.”

He rolled his eyes but took it from her hands and put it on. He looked at his own reflection and sighed: she was so damn right, he looked ridiculously good. This always surprised him: the way she made him better, in everything. She made him happy, she pushed him to follow his dreams, and she even found a way to make him look… hotter?

And Bobby could swear, she was so proud when other girls stared at him with those thirsty looks in their eyes.

It really amazed him how she could be both proud to know that girls are checking him out but also be jealous when he spent time with other people. And that _he_ found absurdly hot - knowing that she wants him to herself somehow turned him on, even though before he’s met her, he’s been avoiding jealous girls.

“God, what’s with your face?” Kat stared at him as they took the elevator downstairs.

“I’ve been thinking about you.”

“Was that a step-by-step plan of a homicide?” She laughed, throwing her arms around Bobby’s neck. “If so, fuck me before you stab me, okay?”

Before he could say anything, her lips found his in a deep, open-mouthed kiss. Never in his life, anyone kissed him like that before, drinking him, devouring him, and it took all of his restraint not to push her into the wall and fuck her right there, in a moving elevator. It wasn’t like he’d never considered it, but they were already running too damn late.

Kat let go of him, and Bobby nuzzled his face into her hair, trying to calm down. She was insane and he was drunk on her insanity, too.

“I love you,” He whispered, kissing her neck gently.

She never said those words back, and if it was anyone else, it would’ve bothered him. But she _showed_ him her love every damn second, and he didn’t need to hear those stupid words. Sometimes, he hated himself for not being able to show _her_ how fucking much he loved her.

“You’re such a melt,” She slipped her hand down his body and wrapped her arm around Bobby’s waist.

“You think so ‘cos you’re a queen bitch,” Bobby retorted, tilting his head to his side.

“If I’m a queen, how come my crown hasn’t been polished yet?” Kat wiggled her eyebrows suggestively, sending them both in a fit of giggles.

Redhead’s phone buzzed and she pulled it out of her purse as they both walked outside the building.

“It’s Alexis,” She looked down at the screen and frowned at the number of exclamation marks in the PR-manager’s message. “Apparently, we’re making them nervous.”

Bobby opened the back door of the cab and helped Kat climb inside.

“Today is literally the worst day for it,” Bobby frowned. “Everyone’s busy, and those group chats are just plain venting.”

Kat nodded: she wasn’t active in most of those chats, the only group chat she’s been active on was her, Priya, and Lottie, who was midst-moving and constantly annoyed with everything. Chelsea once visited them, but she and Gary were too focused on trying to work out the long-distance thing, that Chels couldn’t even talk about anything but that, and it did not help with Lottie’s crappy mood.

“Whatcha thinking?” Bobby repeated her question from a few minutes ago.

“Do you think we’ll stay friends with everyone when the dust settles?”

Sometimes, her mood swings were too exhausting even for herself. Just two minutes ago she was fine, and now, a dark, sticky cloud hung above her head, clouding her face with a thousand grim thoughts.

“I… don’t know,” Bobby replied quietly. “I’d like that but… it’d be a bit unrealistic to expect something that started so quick not to end just as quick, right?”

Her heart sunk at his words. It was Bobby, of all people, he used to be the most blindly optimistic person she’s ever met, and now… Had _she_ done this to him?

“But Lottie lives in a five-minute cab ride from us,” Bobby added when her face darkened. “And Lucas is not that far, right? I think that’s already a win.”

He wrapped an arm around Kat’s shoulder, suddenly noticing how prominent her collarbones have become, and how cold her skin was. Her hands and feet were always freezing, but now this cold spread throughout her body, and Bobby felt this need to warm her up by any cost.

He nudged her cheek with his nose.

“I’ve got you. You know that, right?”

She swallowed through a lump in her throat. She loved this man so much that sometimes she couldn’t feel anything else. She was overwhelmed with this love, and her body just couldn’t hold in anything else, it was just him, only him.

“I know,” She whispered back softly.

The whirlwind that Alexis was consumed them the moment they stepped out of the car in front of the ITV building.

“Ten minutes before we go live!” Alexis yelped. “Why Kat looks like she’s been sleep deprived?”

“Are you asking me?” Bobby snapped back, weaving his arm protectively around Kat’s waist. “How many stupid interviews she’d done in the past month that you’ve set her up for?!”

“She’s half of a whinner couple, and she’ll do whatever I tell her to!”

“Well, this is the last time though,” Kat scowled. “My contract with you expires the second I’m out of this studio, and hopefully, I’ll see you never.”

She hated this so much. She hated stupid interviews and questions about her family. About Jared. Kat knew that he’d bought himself out of this, and she regretted she couldn’t do the same: it was important for Bobby’s business, so she did everything in her powers to support him.

“Quickly! Do something with her face!” Alexis pushed Kat into the chair and nudged a make-up girl who’s been scrolling through her phone.

The girl looked up and spotted Bobby who hanged back to fix his hair. She went bright pink in her cheeks, and Kat rolled her eyes.

“I can introduce you,” She raised an eyebrow, and Alexis snapped her fingers.

“Move it unless you want me to talk to your manager or whoever will fire your arse if you don’t get a grip!”

Bobby walked up to Kat.

“She’s just being a bitch,” He told the girl comfortingly, with a little smile. “Don’t listen to her.”

“And don’t try to bake my face,” Kat added.

Before the riveting conversation could’ve continued, a loud squeal cut through, and Chelsea almost jumped into Kat’s laps.

“Chels!” Kat hugged her back. “Be quiet, they’re filming right over there.”

“Sorry!” Chelsea whispered loudly. “I’m so happy to see ya!”

Suddenly, she was overwhelmed with hugs and kisses, and no one cared about her half face of make-up, and the dumbfounded look on the make-up girl’s face.

“Alright?”

Gary’s voice made Kat slip off her chair and walk straight over to him.

“Hey, stranger.”

He wrapped her into his big arms, and for a moment, she went back in time, to when they’ve just met, and this hunk of a man cuddled her constantly. Everything was so simple back then, just ten single people, sun, and an infinity pool, and absolutely nothing to be worried about.

“You’ve got smaller,” Gary noted.

“It’s just you got buffer,” She squeezed his bicep, and the crane operator laughed.

“There’s a line here, you know,” A playfully sarcastic voice cut through, making Kat’s mouth stretch into a grin uncontrollably.

With a sigh of relief, she coiled her arms around Lucas’ neck and hid her face in his chest. She wasn’t sure if she’d see him today, considering how angry Alexis was.

“Easy, kitten,” Lucas chuckled into her hair as Kat clenched harder into his back.

Kat huffed and pulled away.

“Hey, Lucas,” Bobby smiled at him warmly, and the older guy awkwardly hugged him, too.

“How’s everything?”

Kat got back into the chair, and Rahim walked up to her.

“Hey, again,” He gave her a little smile.

He looked so happy, Kat couldn’t contain a huge grin. She looked over her shoulder at the former Islanders and spotted Shannon.

“Ram,” She squeezed his hand. “Still my favorite islander.”

He chuckled but his stare went deep under her skin.

“How are you, Kat?”

His voice was too serious for this set-up, and redhead knew that he was probably the only person who could see right through her mask. He was usually too considerate to pry, but it didn’t change the fact that he saw exactly what she’s been trying so hard to hide.

“I’m holding on,” She answered truthfully. “Really.”

“You and Bobby are okay? After that article…”

He trailed off when Kat frowned.

“It’s enough of make-up,” He gave the make-up girl a meaningful look. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to pry.”

“No, it’s fine. Everyone’s been asking me this question for the past week or so.”

That article was the reason she stopped checking any of her socials because people went crazy over a picture of Bobby drunk walking with Oksana out of the pub when she felt sick and needed a breath, and Giorgos got called into the gallery.

It wasn’t just the picture – it wasn’t actually about the picture at all. It was about the writer who somehow dug the info about their hookup six years ago. Kat had no doubts Oksana herself spilled the beans to the journalist, but there wasn’t any proof, so she let it slip.

“We spoke to Bobby,” Ibrahim glanced towards the others and then his eyes darted to Alexis. “Talk later, okay?”

Alexis gave them the last instructions and they all gathered near the curtains leading to the set.

Rahim’s words stuck in her head, and Kat couldn’t stop thinking about it.

_They spoke with Bobby…they? Rahim and Gary? Was Lucas a part of that conversation?_

Bobby squeezed her hand, and she squeezed his fingers back, still too caught up in her thoughts. She knew that ever since that article Bobby never spoke to the girl and he and Giorgos spent a lot of time together. But was it Bobby’s decision or their friends talked some sense into him?

Kat glanced at Lucas as they all took their seats under the cheering from the audience. He looked collected and a little bored, and also very, very tired. She could see dark circles under his eyes, and the way his fingers were shaking as if he already had too much coffee.

Bobby was answering one of the host’s question and Kat listened in to the conversation, trying to keep up with it while her mind went wondering.

It was so strange, being back together with all of these people yet again. Like the past two months did not exist like they were still the same people as on their first day in the Villa. Like life hadn’t messed up with some of them already.

“… what about you, Kat?”

Kat flipped her hair over the shoulder and smiled.

“For me, it was always a Friends Island,” She replied with the signature “Kat smile” that the pressed loved so much. “I’ve found people that became my family, and it’s something I will always be grateful for… not to mention this one,” She playfully threw her arm around Bobby’s shoulders and kissed him on a cheek.

She loved him so much, it wouldn’t matter that much if there was an entire bakery filled with his ex-hookups. She got caught by surprise with Oksana’s sudden presence in Bobby’s life but… _But who the fuck cares about Oksana?_

She was proud of herself, she did well today. She didn’t let the swing of her mood carry her too far away, and Bobby’s been beaming through the entire interview, answering fan’s question about his plans – and he made sure to include her in each and every part it.

He was still playful with his responses, but it was clear as day that he wanted everyone to know that he’s taken, and it sent jolts of electricity down Kat’s spine. All the times she left him bruises and bite marks - he never tried covering it up, wearing it instead of jewelry, and it almost drove her wild, this knowledge that everyone knew who he belonged to.

She almost missed the moment when Lucas’ voice trembled as he answered one of the questions. Kat shot him a glance, mad at herself for not listening. His face was drained out of color, and so was Lottie’s while everyone else seemed couldn’t decide whether they should stare at them or at her and Bobby.

“That’s it, fellas,” Host cleared his throat. “Again, another round of applause…”

Kat could see Lucas’ eyes burning with anger, and she had no doubt he’s going to go off on someone any moment now, and her insides tightened into a knot.

“Just don’t lose it,” Redhead leaned into Lucas and whisper quietly as they all walked to the long table to sign pictures and meet the fans. “I’m here.”

She found his hand and squeezed it firmly, feeling his galloping pulse under her fingers. She spotted Priya as the older girl was whispering something to Lottie, probably, the same, Kat just told to Lucas.

Bobby’s arm wrapped around her waist and Kat leaned into him.

“What was that question about?”

“If the rumors of him sleeping with you were true.”

She almost stumbled when Bobby said those words casually.

“What?”

Bobby pulled her even closer as they reached the table.

“Don’t think about it, Red, okay? That was just a stupid question.”

Kat’s head was spinning. First, that stupid article, now this – is it always going to be like that?

Alexis made sure Lucas and Lottie were seated at the opposite end of the table from Kat and Bobby and whispered angrily: “Smile.”

She had to pull on an unconvincing smirk, even though she felt like she'd been slapped on her face. The only reason she was here was Bobby’s bakery that needed as much press as possible, and she reminded herself of it every damn second of the next hour. Her head was in a haze, her sleep deprivation and a mix of anger and anxiety brought her pounding migraine that she could barely bear by the time they were done.

“Pub?” Gary asked when they all finally stumbled out of the building.

“Pub!!” A choir of cheerful voices agreed, turning to Kat.

“Lead the way, babes!” Priya wrapped her arm around redhead’s waist, pulling her closer.

“I can’t walk if you’re hogging me like your personal cuddle bear,” Kat chuckled, feeling suddenly better than in many days. “Okay, we need to stop attracting stares.”

She stepped onto the road and hailed for a cab, hoping that her usual luck wouldn’t fail this time. When Shannon, Rahim, Noah, and Priya climbed into the first car, Kat spotted Lucas and Bobby standing just a little aside from the rest of the group, and a sudden knot tightened in her chest.

“They’ll be fine, Bobby knows better than rumors,” Gary followed her gaze and frowned.

“I know,” She nodded.

She wasn’t worried about Bobby being jealous, she was terrified of what might’ve been going on through Lucas’ head these past few weeks. After the night Bobby invited Oksana, Giorgos, and Sasha to join them for drinks, she and Lucas were following their ‘visiting schedule’ religiously, avoiding any reminders of the way physio reacted to her hanging out with the others.

Kat still couldn’t forgive herself for skipping their hangout to spend time with Bobby’s ex-hookup.

She shook her head and blurted the address to another cabbie and waved the boys over.

“Yo, dudes!”

Both of them rolled their eyes and walked up to her. Lucas looked a tad less rattled but still not nearly close to normal.

“You two should take another car,” Bobby whispered to his girlfriend, brushing her hair away from her face. “I’ll keep them entertained so you can talk.”

Kat’s heart swelled in her chest at his words. He was probably the only person who would’ve said these words and actually _mean_ it. He gave her a soft, tender kiss and climbed into the cab.

“Scooch over,” He hip-bumped Gary and shut the car door close before anyone could realize that Kat and Lucas weren’t joining them.

Slowly, Lucas turned to the girl and let out a small sigh of relief.

“You’re going to talk me into joining the others,” He stated.

“No,” She replied. “I’m just going to hang out with you, here or anywhere else you’d like.”

“Is that so?”

Kat nodded and grabbed his hand, pulling him into the nearby alley.

“Oh?” Lucas chuckled. “I thought these empty alleys is your and Bobby thing?”

She felt her face flush red at this reminder of that time when someone almost caught them in a back alley behind the bar and posted about it on Twitter.

“Shut up.”

Kat led them both into a small garden with just one bench and a swing.

“How do you know about this place?” Lucas flopped down next to her, staring around.

“I had a lot of time to walk around the city by myself,” She shrugged, resting her head on his shoulder. “I thought you might like it here.”

Lucas weaved his arm around Kat’s waist pulling her closer and closed his eyes for a long moment, enjoying the sudden peacefulness. He knew they didn’t have much time before others start texting Kat, and he wanted to savor every moment of this alone time with his best friend.

He pulled a pack of cigarettes out of the pocket of his leather jacket.

“Since when do you smoke?” Kat watched him with a glimpse of surprise.

“I don’t,” He shrugged, dragging on a cigarette.

She took the cigarette from his fingers and slowly took a draw on it, inhaling smoke deeply into her lungs.

“I didn’t know you smoke,” Lucas said through a sudden lump in his throat, watching her lips wrapping around the end of a cigarette, and her cheeks hollowing.

“I don’t,” She returned his comment, puffing rings of smoke out. “I’m gonna ask you one thing, and I want to know the truth before I drag you into that pub and get you drunk like a fucking schoolgirl.”

Lucas chuckled and raised his eyebrow.

“Are you not okay?”

For a long moment, he kept quiet, and they just smoked one cigarette passing it to each other, their eyes locked. Finally, Lucas threw the tab-end away and leaned closer in to whisper: “Yes.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A


	8. Keep on running but I can't escape...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know, I promised to stop with the longass chapters but well, I lied.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "...One lone survivor  
> Of fanatical and overcooked love  
> Emotion, it is brighter  
> Since you entered as the jewel in a treasure trove..."
> 
> [One Lone Survivor - Tim Aminov]

“Bobby, please,” Sasha grabbed baker’s shoulders and shook him. “Can you stop it with this emotional tantrum and relax?”

Bobby’s breath was hitched, and his hands were trembling so much his phone slipped out of his fingers. He tried to pick it up but ended hitting his head against the marble kitchen counter.

“Fuck!” Bobby rubbed the top of his head, wincing in pain, and looked at his manager. “Why are you even here?”

“Because Kat knew you’re gonna be freaking out all day today and didn’t want you to be alone.”

_If she didn’t want me to be alone, she wouldn’t have sneaked out before six in the morning._

Bobby frowned at his thoughts: this was unfair on her. No one has ever done what she did for him. No one ever loved him enough to put their entire life on hold so he could fulfill his dreams. No one ever made him feel important, and he was a dick thinking that Kat’s two-hours absence was something he had a right to blame her for.

His phone beeped from the floor, and Sasha picked it and gave it to Bobby.

“You’ve got a visitor,” Concierge announced. “Miss Charlotte.”

“Let miss Charlotte in,” Bobby almost spluttered, imagining Lottie’s face at this exact moment. “I guess, you’re not the only one Kat sent to keep an eye on me.”

Sasha shrugged but his face lit up just a little at the mention of blonde goth.

“She knows you’re a nutcase.”

Bobby rolled his eyes and left the other man in kitchen to meet Lottie. They haven’t seen each other much in the past few days, as he was constantly busy at the bakery, and she just started her work as a make-up artist for one of the arising popstars.

Lottie stumbled out of the elevator and raised her hand to knock the moment Bobby flew the door open.

“Miss Charlotte,” She spitted as she got inside the flat. “What the fuck is that?! Do they call you mister Bobby or something? I’ve told that prick three times already, stop calling me that…”

She trailed off as she spotted Sasha in the kitchen.

“Hey,” He nodded. “Coffee?”

“Yes, please,” She exhaled a deep sigh of relief. “I can’t stay for long, my client has a meeting at eleven and she wants ‘rainbow eyebrows like James did in his tutorial’,” Lottie’s voice turned mockingly high-pitch and annoying. “I swear to god, I’m grateful for this job but sometimes that girl is an annoying little bitch.”

“How did you even get a gig like that?” Sasha put a mug on the counter before Lottie.

“Kat knew this guy whose boyfriend is one of her – Kayley – musicians, and he put a word in for me,” Lottie’s face immediately softened.

Bobby sat down across the counter and listened to them with a half-smile playing at the corners of his mouth. Just hearing Kat’s name made his nervousness subside, and his mind wandered off to last night when she physically dragged him out of the bakery and took him for a dinner under the stars at the roof terrace of their building.

He could remember in every little detail the way her eyes sparkled when she saw the astounded look on his face.

“You’ve made it yourself?”

Bobby wasn’t even sure if he was talking about the dinner, or the setup, or the Universe – at that moment, he wouldn’t be surprised if it turned out that she created this fucking world itself, because she was _everything_.

He spoke with Louis earlier that day, and it wasn’t a pleasant conversation. His mates were still mad at him for breaking his friendship with Johno, and they were still very much against Kat, all save for Dean. It was so damn ironic, that the only person who supported him with the most important thing in his life was the same person who Bobby very mutually disliked for two years.

And Bobby hated that they’ve put him into this position, where he had to choose between them and the love of his life… Because they’d already lost. There was nothing, no one that he’d ever even think of choosing over her, she was his life now, all of it, and nothing else mattered.

“You saw me in the kitchen,” Kat chuckled softly. “Cooking is not ‘on-the-counter’ activity I’m good at.”

Bobby’s face flushed hotly at all the memories, and he swallowed hard and nodded.

“I’m a fan of all your… activities.”

It was funny how he sometimes lost his footing around her, literally and metaphorically. His playful jokes would just get stuck in his throat at the way she looked at him, or the way the atmosphere crackled with electricity when she tilted closer to him.

Their flirty banter didn’t go away but it turned a few shades darker, and Bobby couldn’t deny that it turned him on so fucking much. This _intensity_ made him feel things he’d never felt before, and it awakened a part of him that he never knew existed.

A part of him that enjoyed _receiving_ whatever Kat was willing to give, a part that suddenly started _demanding_ more and more. He couldn’t get enough of her fuck, and her love, and her care, and her darkness that started spreading onto him, too. He couldn’t get enough of this feeling of walking on the edge whenever she got into one of her moods.

And he would’ve been worried about his own sanity if it wasn’t so damn hot, seeing her messed up hair and frantically glistering eyes when she went down on him when he was chopping _cucumbers_ for a salad, and wouldn’t let him stop making that fucking salad even when her mouth took him so deep he felt like his body might just explode.

A part of him was constantly wondering where his limits might lie – and another part of him knew, that he didn’t have any. She could’ve done whatever to him, and he wouldn’t stop her. She got him so overwhelmed, so _overflowed_ with feelings for her, he needed to somehow release at least just a tiny part of those feelings.

When she stood up with a glass of champagne in her hand, Bobby’s heart fluttered inside of his chest: she rarely spoke these days, and her willingness to _speak_ right now made his breath stutter excitedly.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to propose,” Kat chuckled at the way Bobby edged closer. “I know you want to do it properly, with all our friends present and a dick-shaped cake with a ring buried deep inside.”

“Damn right,” Bobby grinned at her. “And I’m gonna make you eat it without using your hands.”

He loved her so fucking much, spending just one life with her wasn’t enough. He wanted all of it, all of their lives, every second of every day of every fucking life. With her.

“Before I met you, I had no idea how to live my life,” Redhead suddenly went serious. “I was lost and confused but I didn’t know that. I seemed to be happy but deep inside, I felt nothing. At all. I could’ve been laughing or crying or yelling at the top of my lungs – but there was nothing behind it. Like someone just switched my emotions off. But you… you showed me how life should be. You’ve made me feel again. All good and bad, everything.”

Bobby’s heart was pounding out of his chest. He knew how much not okay she was – and her saying that she’d rather feel pain than nothing at all… he couldn’t tell if it terrified him or made him sickeningly cocksure.

“I was frozen before I’ve met you, Bobby,” Kat continued, looking deeply into his amber eyes. “You’ve woken me up. An I know that anyone else would prefer the Kat you’ve met on our first day in the Villa – flirty, playful, sweet Kat that was willing to give up on anything just to make others happy – I’m grateful that you love the Kat you have now just as much as that Kat.”

He could barely breathe by the end of her speech. He knew exactly what she’s been talking about.

Their friends weren’t blind or stupid, they all have noticed she was off. With each passing week, more people started asking him and Lottie cautious question if Kat was alright. The never-ending speculations of the media about her and Lucas’ ‘what if’ thing didn’t help much, even though none of the former islanders had any doubts in Kat’s loyalties, it was just… draining.

Bobby wished he could protect her from all the nasty things people said about her – and from all the sickeningly sweet and supportive, too. He knew how hard she’s been trying _for him_ , even on the days she could barely drag herself out of bed, she’d put on her famous half-smile and do everything, because _he_ needed that publicity for _his_ bakery.

He hated that she had to step on her own throat for him, but that depraved part of him that had woken up recently felt so damn good knowing how much she was into _this,_ that she was into this just as deep as he was.

“I love you so fucking much,” Bobby tugged on Kat’s hand, making her lower herself onto his lap.

When she straddled him, baker took the glass from her hand and took a small sip, trying to get rid of that sudden lump in his throat.

“That was my champagne, Robert,” Kat said seriously. “You can’t just drink someone else’s drink without asking for permission.”

The smolder in her eyes sent little shivers down Bobby’s spine and he swallowed hard.

“Oh, I’m sorry, miss Kat,” Bobby’s eyes widened in mock repentance. “That was an inexcusable behavior.”

She nodded, slowly running her forefinger up his throat, and Bobby felt himself getting harder.

“You should be punished for such mischief. I should teach you some etiquette.”

“Oh, please, do, Kat.”

She raised an eyebrow at him.

“It’s miss Kat to you.”

He swallowed hard as she brought her face closer to his, and Bobby could now see how dark and deep her eyes turned. Slowly, her mouth grazed his jaw, and his evening stubble scratched hard against her soft lips.

Bobby sighed and leaned in closer, but she pulled away.

“Oh, please,” He almost whined.

“That’s your punishment,” Girl smiled softly. “This will teach you to know better next time.”

He let out a strangled groan when she shifted in his lap, pushing herself closer to him, and rubbed against his hard length. Kat tilted her head to her side and arched her eyebrow ever so slightly. With a mischievous grin, she rolled her hips gently, drawing a full-on moan out of the man.

“Got something to say?”

Bobby did have plenty of things to tell her. How much he loved her. How hard he wanted her. How terrifyingly excited she made him. But he just bit down on his lip and shook his head.

“Good. Your mouth can do way more than talking,” She pressed her thumb to his lower lip. “Open.”

His dick twitched in his jeans, and he almost moaned at the sensation. Kat reached for the glass in his hand and took it carefully from his fingers. Keeping their eyes locked, she took a large gulp and lowered her face to Bobby’s parted lips, and the first drop of liquor touched his lips. Unconsciously, he licked it off, and redhead arched an eyebrow. He opened his mouth again, and the sensation of warm bubbly drink slowly slithering into his mouth and down his throat felt almost overwhelming.

He could feel her breath burning on his skin, and their lips almost – painfully _almost_ – touching.

Bobby tilted his head up, trying to catch Kat’s lips with his mouth as the last drop of liquor ran down his chin, but she only moved further away.

“Uh-uh,” She smiled almost gently when one of her hands took a firm hold of his neck, and another unzipped his jeans. “Lift yourself up.”

With her still on top of him, Bobby pushed his hips up, and she moved his pants slightly down and wrapped her fingers around his achingly hard cock.

“Well, Bobby,” Her voice was low and quiet as her hand pumped him lazily. “This is not how it works. You’re not looking part, mate.”

She shifted in his lap and sunk herself down onto him, drawing a strained husky groan out of her boyfriend. She felt so fucking good, and he prayed for her to start moving, as he pushed his hips up again, even though he could barely move in this position. His hand clenched hysterically on her thighs, and his fingers dug deep into her skin when she finally rolled her hips.

“I want you to be always ready,” She leaned forward, dragging her lips across Bobby’s jawline.

“I-I am always…” He stuttered when the grip on his neck tightened.

Kat chuckled darkly.

“I don’t want you to wear underwear anymore.”

Her words went straight into his cock, making it swell even bigger inside of her.

“You got it?”

Bobby nodded, desperately squirming beneath her.

“Say it.”

“Yeah-Yes, I got it,” He whimpered. “Please – fuck, Kat…”

She smirked and finally started moving on him, hard and fast, using the hand on his neck for stability, and his world dwindled, the only thing existed was this fucking chair and the lights of night London. Bobby braced himself forward, getting up to his feet, and in surprise, Kat almost lost her footing before wrapping her legs around him.

“Uh? Someone’s feeling feisty?” She grinned when Bobby pinned her against the glass fence, and half of Kat’s upper body hung in the air, almost above it.

“You trust me,” He almost repeated her words from a long time ago, this time, as a statement. “Let go.”

His arms wrapped tightly around Kat’s waist when she released him from her grip and stretched her arms above her hand, leaning backward, until her head and part of her upper body were hanging freely above the distant streets.

She threw her head back, staring at the cloudy skies above them, and Bobby finally let himself move. His arms wrapped around her body were strong and secure, and his thrusts were deep and slow, and they both lost themselves to each other. He watched her face, drinking the little beads of sweat forming at her temples, and her parted lips and half-lidded eyes, and the way her dress twinkled.

He moved inside of her, feeling her walls clench all over him, and it was too good, too strong, too much. Kat moved one of her hands down her body until it slipped under the skirt of her dress, and Bobby felt her fingers brush against his lower ab before she started circling her clit, and her moans became louder.

His head lolled back when she suddenly pushed her hips into him and clamped down hard on him, pulsing and vibrating all over him, her scream caught in her throat when she came so hard, it sent Bobby over the edge the same moment.

He thrust into her, but she was so fucking tight he could barely move, and he growled, pulling Kat back up to bury his face in the crook of her neck as his hips moved sporadically.

There was no control with her and no fear, and absolutely no limits.

“I hope you’ve learned your lesson,” Kat whispered into his ear, slowly unwrapping herself from him.

“For fucks sake, _Bobby_!” Lottie’s voice drew him out of his haze, and Bobby’s face went red when he realized that he’d missed the entire conversation.

Thankfully, he was sitting across the kitchen counter from them, and they couldn’t see his stauner, yet he shuffled a little on the barstool to readjust himself.

“What?”

“Are you _that_ worried about the opening?” Goth’s voice became softer. “Everything’s going to be fine, you’ll see.”

She looked at her phone and frowned.

“Shit, I’ve gotta go.”

She walked over the counter to kiss Bobby on a cheek and skipped, leaving two men alone again.

“Okay, so what do…”

Sasha’s phone started buzzing hysterically, and he rolled his eyes.

“I’ve got to take this.”

When his manager left the kitchen, Bobby dropped his head onto his crossed arms, trying to calm himself down. Thinking about last night in front of other people was a horrible idea, but at least, it took his mind off of things.

Sasha came back a few moments later with a look of concern glued to his face.

“What?” Bobby’s heart made a backflip.

“Just don’t freak out,” the older man said calmingly. “The cinnamon stars you’ve ordered…”

“What about them?”

“Well, they’ve sent sticks.”

Bobby took a deep breath: it’s going to be a long day.

_Where the hell is Kat?_

***

Kat held the back door for one of the delivery people and waited until he pushed the stocked-up tray inside. Bakery looked like utter chaos, and she started worrying if they’ll have enough space for the actual guests, with all the additional stuff invited for the opening.

Sasha spotted her from across the room and beckoned her over. Carefully, she maneuvered between furniture and people, making sure to keep the garment bag up.

“Hey,” She nodded to the manager. “I’ve picked up Bobby’s clothes for tonight, I was on my way home but figured you might need some help calming him down.”

After Kat sneaked out this morning to see her therapist, she spent the rest of the day running Bobby’s errands since the “cinnamon disaster” slowly turned into a “buttercream catastrophe” and evolved into full-on “red velvet breakdown”.

“Go check on that drama queen,” Sasha grimaced. “If I walk into the kitchen and see him midst-tantrum, I swear to god, I’ll stuff his mouth with one of his cupcakes that he called “misshapen”.

Kat chuckled and handed the man her stuff.

“Okay, I’ll see how he’s doing. You owe me a big one,” She teased before pushing the door to back rooms.

When she entered the kitchen, Bobby was just staring into an empty oven sitting in a pose of Le Penseur.

“Bobby?”

Kat shooshed two waitresses and locked the door behind herself. Only the loud sound snapped baker out of his trance.

“Oh, hey,” He slowly propped himself up. “That lock doesn’t really work.”

She raised an eyebrow at him and walked up closer.

“Are you okay?”

Kat’s hands found Bobby’s and she squeezed his fingers gently. He looked at her and nodded slowly. He wasn’t really okay, he was terrified. Everything he’s been working for was at stake, and he had no idea how to cope. Having his own bakery was a dream that almost came true, and he was on edge.

Especially, after all the things that had gone wrong already, he had no idea what was going to happen next. When Giorgos stood by a couple of hours ago, Bobby almost lost it, and he felt horrible for going off on the guy who’d helped him so much.

“I’m such a mess.”

Bobby brought her hand to his mouth and gave her knuckles a gentle kiss.

“I know. But I also know that tonight is going to be great. And tomorrow will be better, and then the day after tomorrow will be even better, and then, each day will be better than the day before until we die.”

He knew she was right. He knew that his fear was irrational. But he just couldn’t take a grip and suck it up.

“Bobby,” Her voice dropped to a whisper. “Just tell me what to do to make you feel better.”

She ran her free hand up his arm, looking deeply into his eyes, and Bobby’s breath stuttered. She was what he needed. He swallowed hard before guiding her hand to his crotch until it was atop his hardening dick.

“How do you want me to take care of you?” She asked, stroking him softly through the fabric.

“With- with your mouth,” Bobby breathed out, his face turning red.

She smiled smugly, and he rolled his eyes, and Kat nibbled on his neck a bit harder, grazing her teeth just over a little bruise that her fingers left last night. Bobby let out a small moan of pleasure when she unzipped his jeans to find out he was following her instructions.

Without a word, she dropped to her knees, freeing his cock, and looked up at Bobby kicking the breath out of him when her lips wrapped around the head and slowly moved down his length. It wasn’t enough, and Bobby bucked his hip forward a little, not wanting to look too desperate but also needing _more_.

She chuckled around him and pushed herself into him, and when hit the back of her throat, Bobby had to press his hand hard against his mouth to muffle a loud groan. He used another hand to clasp onto the counter behind him for stability, and let his eyes fall shut for a moment, as her mouth worked him harder.

It was a bit sick, the way she made him constantly yearn her, and the way he couldn’t think about anything else when she was around. He was so fucking deep into this, there was no way out – there was nothing in the world that could make him not crave her.

“Fuck- Kat,” He whispered brokenly when one of her hands traveled up his stomach, scratching roughly, making his muscles twitch under her touch.

He looked down at her to meet the blazing stare of her blown pupils that made her eyes look black, and the way her lips were wrapped around his shinning with her spit cock almost made him come the same moment. He was so fucking deep; she could’ve stabbed him in the back and he’d just handed her another knife. She could’ve cut him open and wrench his insides and he’d still asked for more.

Bobby’s hand slipped into her hear, taking control over her, and she moaned, vibrating all over him, and he barely managed to cut a desperate cry ready to leave his mouth. He looked down at her again. She locked their eyes and deep throated him, squeezing his balls, and he lost it.

Her white off-shoulder sweater and white high-waisted shorts, and her bare face covered with feverish blush, and her messed hair, and her huge eyes staring into him – he knew exactly what his death will look like.

His hand flew up to his mouth, but his growl was too loud, too feral as he came deep inside of her throat, almost falling down on the floor next to her. Kat’s hands gripped his thighs firmly, helping him stay on his feet as he thrust erratically riding out his high until he finally could only feel little aftershocks.

Bobby dropped to his knees the same moment, panting, too blissed out to move, and she carefully wrapped him into a soft, soothing embrace, stroking his back gently.

When he finally could move, baker pulled away just a little to look into his girl’s face.

“I know what I’m giving you for Christmas,” Kat smiled mischievously.

“It’s October.”

“Ah lik' tae plan hings,” Kat said mockingly with a heavy Scottish accent, and Bobby rolled his eyes. “But at second thought, why wait?”

She ran her finger teasingly across his mouth.

“Well, what’s that gift then?” Bobby felt her other hand zipping up his jeans.

Kat leaned in and whispered:

“A ball gag.”

***

Bobby’s anxiety hit the new level when he finally got home to get changed. Sasha had to kick him out of the bakery, and now, Bobby was staring into the shower wall for what seemed like forever. He knew that he shouldn’t be freaking out, he knew that everything was going to be great – but there was a thought at the back of his mind that he’s not good enough, that he will fuck it all up.

No matter how many times Kat told him that he’s good enough, he couldn’t just erase years of self-doubts and broken promises, even though with her, he managed to forget about it most of the time.

“Bobby.”

Kat’s voice cut through the sounds of running water, and Bobby turned around to look at her.

“Ten minutes is enough to take a shower and even shave your legs. You’ve been here for seventeen minutes so I’m expecting to see a fucking masterpiece of grooming.”

She was a bit on edge herself, Bobby could tell by the way her eyes glistered and how frantic her movements were as she walked up to sink to wash her face. He turned off the tap and stepped out of the shower stall, reaching for one of the towels, and her eyes followed him in the mirror.

“I can give you some of the pills I have,” Kat suggested. “I took them before and still have a few.”

Bobby nodded, and she opened one of the cabinets.

“Here, just put this under your tongue and let it dissolve.”

“You okay yourself?” Bobby ran his hand up the girl’s arm, knowing too well that she wasn’t.

“I’ll be fine when we’re there, just… too much nervous energy and too little time to use you as my personal sex toy.”

She pressed a quick kiss to his lips and pushed Bobby away.

“Go get ready, now.”

Bobby rolled his eyes and wrapped his arms around her waist instead, feeling the bitter taste in his mouth.

“I can still fuck you, if you want,” His hand slipped up her body, opening her robe.

“We’re already running late.”

“The party won’t start without us,” His fingers gently brushed her hardened nipple.

Kat spun on her heel to face Bobby.

“So, I see, you’re not freaking out anymore,” She chuckled softly, shaking his hands off herself. “Good. Now, go get ready because Lottie’s gonna be here in about five minutes.”

He complied and walked into the closet, looking around for the garment bag with his outfit for tonight. Bobby gave himself a look in a mirror: shaving extra close was a good shout. He let the towel fall onto the floor as he reached for his boxers but stopped for a moment.

“As much as it pains me to say it, not wearing underwear with fitted pants might not be a good call,” Kat’s words made Bobby blush.

He huffed and put the boxers on and then unzipped the garment bag.

“I went for classics,” Kat commented with just a hint of uncertainty in her voice. “Black pants and white dress shirt always work.”

It wasn’t his usual style, but he trusted her completely.

Kat’s personal phone beeped.

“Oh, it’s Lottie. She’s asking me to meet her because if she hears miss Charlotte once again… Yeah she left the dots,” Redhead smirked and shrugged off her robe to pull on sweater and shorts, and Bobby had to will himself into not staring at her. “B right B.”

When she left, Bobby took a deep breath.

_Why is she even with me? She could’ve had anyone – how come I’ve lucked out so fucking much?_

He finished dressing up and stared at his own reflection in awe. Now, he finally knew how Kat saw him, and his heart grew ten thousand sizes, risking to just rip out of the chest. No one ever saw him like this, no one ever made him feel like this, and Bobby couldn’t help that smug smirk forming at the corners of his mouth as he walked into the living room.

“Hey, Lo. Wow, you look amazing!”

Lottie was wearing a black crochet dress, and her blonde hair was arranged into a complicated do.

“Bitch, I know,” She smirked at him. “Kat’s fashion sense is on point, as always,” Lottie nodded at Bobby. “Okay, you, lazy ass, go get dressed. Everyone’s so excited to see you guys.”

“We literally saw each other two days ago,” Kat mumbled but bit on her tongue and smiled before leaving the room.

“It was such a great idea for you guys to arrive all together,” Bobby flopped on the couch next to Lottie.

“Well, yeah, about that,” Witch’s cheeks suddenly blushed. “Do you think I could come earlier, you know, to help with the last-minute preparations?”

Bobby eyes his friend suspiciously.

“Since when you help people at all?”

Lottie huffed and send him an irritated look.

“Okay, if you must know, I might… well, I might just want to… spend some time with your manager, okay?”

“Sasha?” Bobby asked mechanically.

“No, another hot guy with a Russian accent,” Lottie looked at him irritably. “Yes, Sasha.”

“I thought you and Giorgos…”

“I’m not getting involve with another Kat’s…” Blonde clasped her mouth shut and looked at Bobby with a look of horror on her face.

Baker gave her a puzzled look, reaching to the coffee table to grab an AC controller.

“What? Another Kat’s what?”

“Nothing,” Lottie’s cheeks were deep purple when she turned away from him.

Finally, realization downed on Bobby, and he sat up a bit straighter. He knew that Giorgos and Kat shared past, and Greek actually tried to have a “I fucked her girlfriend many years ago” talk, but Bobby just shut him down. He knew that Kat wasn’t a virgin when they’ve met, for fucks sake, she’d slept with Lucas – not once, apparently – in those few weeks they’ve spent in Majorca. He didn’t care about her hook-up from five years ago, and it was annoying how their friends kept walking on their toes around him as if he was a fragile porcelain doll.

“I know that they’ve slept some time ago,” Bobby finally said. “And seriously, how fragile do you think I am that you’ve almost had a heart attack just now?”

He sounded way more aggressive than he’d expected, and Bobby immediately felt a poke of guilt.

“Sorry, Lotta. I didn’t mean to snap at you.”

Blonde nodded and pulled him into a brief hug.

“It’s okay, I know, you’re nervous about tonight, but it’s gonna be great.”

They sat for a few moments in silence before Bobby shrugged it off.

“I’m gonna make us drinks while we’re waiting. I’ll be right back.”

He left Lottie alone in the living room, and she grubbed one of the books from the coffee table and snuggled deeper into the couch. ‘Metamorphoses’, she read on the cover. _Surely, that’s not Bobby’s._

“Lo, open the door, please!” Bobby’s loud voice caught her off-guard, making blonde jump a little.

She huffed, put the book back, and walked barefoot through the corridor.

Her breath got caught in her throat when she saw Lucas standing in the doorway, and suddenly, she knew that somehow the worst night to talk about what had happened between them will be exactly the night they will talk about it.

The exact same emotions were imprinted on his face when Lucas took a step inside the flat and shut the door close behind himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A


	9. Where's the person that I know?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ❣️ IMPORTANT ❣️
> 
> Thank you everyone who's been sticking around. I've been feeling pretty discouraged and burnt out lately, probably, all the shit that is happening around me started to finally catch up with my brain. 
> 
> To be honest, posting chapters of this story isn't easy for me, for many reasons, and I have constant doubts about whether I should or should not continue it. 
> 
> If you like this story and want me to go through with it please let me know, as I have this unsettling feeling that most of the people who enjoyed YCW silently hate me for carrying on with the sequel, and I'd rather know it now.
> 
> The angst in this story isn't the angst in other ffs, there's nothing cute or romantic about it, people in this story won't make you squeal with excitement, and it won't make you feel all the fuzzy warm feelings. People in this story are broken and deeply not okay, and while I can't say 'there's no happy ending', it's possible there won't be one.
> 
> This story is exactly what the tags suggest, and I need to know if this story is something needed in this fandom.

“Hey,” Lucas stepped inside, closing the door behind himself. “You look beautiful,” He nodded at her black lace dress.

“Thank – thank you,” Lottie’s voice cracked a little. “You look great, too.”

They stood a few seconds in awkward silence. They never talked about what happened between them, and Bobby’s bakery opening night wasn’t exactly the best time to change it. Scot’s voice coming from the kitchen made both of them jump a little.

“Oi, guys!”

“I guess, that’s our cue,” Lottie frowned a little. “I don’t want this to be awkward. It’s ridiculous.”

“I know,” Lucas nodded. “I think we should just put it behind and move forward.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Blonde smiled sheepishly. “C’mon, we should check on Bobby. He’s having a rough day.”

“Yeah, Kat mentioned the red velvet breakdown,” He chuckled, following Lottie into the kitchen.

Bobby was standing behind the marble kitchen island, finishing making mojitos. He garnished four glassed with mint and crushed sugar and nodded at his creation.

“Be my guests.”

Baker patted Lucas’ back as physio approached him.

“Bobby,” Lucas’ eyes widened. “You look great, mate.”

“Thank you, thank you,” Baker made a little twirl. “All props to Kat. He’s my personal stylist, besides everything else.”

They clinked glasses, and Lucas chugged half of his glass in few large gulps. He couldn’t identify the reason behind his anxiety tonight, but this heavy feeling in his chest was there since the morning.

“I’m gonna use the bathroom while we’re waiting for Kat,” Lucas grabbed his glass and left Lottie and Bobby to discuss all the kinds of pastries that Bobby prepared for tonight.

He walked down the corridor, dragging his gaze from paintings to vases with lilies and mirrors. This flat was both Kat and not her at all. She was in the lilies and in the shades of grey in the drawing, and she was in the soft off-white carpet. But that massive kitchen wasn’t her, and so wasn’t the pretentious heavy furniture.

“Oh, hey, Shadow,” Lucas squatted to give the cat a scratch.

“Bobby?” Kat’s voice sounded so close as she called out from the closet. “Come over here, I need help.”

Lucas straightened up and took a step towards the closet.

“It’s me,” He warned before stepping inside.

Kat was standing before the full-length mirror, trying to pull up the zipper on her multi-layered emerald green mini dress with heavily bejeweled corset.

“Oh,” She looked at him in the reflection. “Would you help me? I can’t zip it all the way up.”

Lucas swallowed through the lump in his throat and took a few steps until he was just behind her. She smiled at him in the reflection as he gently pushed her hair aside, and she straightened her arm up to give him access to the zip fly on the side of the dress. She smelled of jasmine and vanilla, just like always, and her scent enveloped him into a warm embrace.

His fingers found the zipper and he pulled it up gently, so he didn’t hurt her.

“Thank you,” She said softly, wrapping her arm around his shoulder, bringing him closer. “Always photoshoot ready, aren’t you, Dr. Koh?”

“You know it, kitten,” Lucas chuckled, pressing a kiss to her temple. “Bobby looks great, too.”

Her eyes sparkled.

“He does, does he?” Kat twisted her body, so they were now facing each other. “I can’t believe he was still single just three months ago.”

Lucas chuckled.

“He didn’t know you back then.”

“Well, he knew Oksana,” Kat bit the tip of her tongue. “Ignore that.”

“No,” Lucas stroked a strand of her hair out of the girl’s face. “Is she still around?”

Kar rolled her eyes. After that ridiculous article, Bobby made it clear that they couldn’t hang out together anymore, but it didn’t mean Russian disappeared completely. She was still with Giorgos, and Giorgos and Bobby were having a little bromance these days which led to them hanging out together, including hanging out at the gallery, where Oksana, as it turned out, was assisting him with Satan only knew what.

Redhead snapped herself back together and gave Lucas a little smile.

“It’s okay. Really, it’s fine.”

He could see well enough that nothing about her was fine. He knew she was taking pills again, and that she never told Bobby she was back in therapy. He knew that every day she struggled to keep her mood swings under control and that it was only a matter of time when she loses it. And he could only hope he’ll manage to be there for her when it happens.

“Have you spoke to Lottie?” Kat asked, stroking her thumb across his cheekbone.

“Sort of.”

“Sort of?”

“We’re trying to move past whatever had happened and get back to being mates.”

Kat frowned a little, biting her lip – a little gesture she did unconsciously and that had so much power over anyone who witnessed it. When she looked up at him, Lucas’ breath hitched: somehow, time and space didn’t make his feelings subside.

Spending five days away from her every single week seemed excruciatingly long, and every time he saw her, his feelings only got deeper, and Lucas hated it. He hated how painfully in love he was with his mate’s girlfriend, how painfully in love he was with his own best friend. Maybe, he had a few more months with her until Bobby loses his temper and asks her to stop seeing another man every damn weekend.

Maybe, he should’ve distanced himself now, before it gets any worse – his love for her?

Maybe, he should – but he knew, he won’t. He will never leave her until she tells him to, and even then, he wasn’t sure he’d be physically able to do so. She was too deep inside of him, she was running through his veins with the blood.

“Thanks for coming here tonight, Luc,” Kat whispered softly, caressing his cheek with the tips of her fingers.

“Always,” He whispered back, fighting back an urge to bite hard on his lip.

He couldn’t imagine feeling this way, even two months ago, when he heard her saying “I love you” to Bobby, he had no idea that it might become even more painful, whatever this feeling was. Was he in love? Did he love her? Was there even a name to this feeling?

Was there a name for this sensation of belonging completely to someone who will never belong to you?

Lucas took a step back, studying the girl for a moment.

“You look stunning. Bobby won’t even know what hit him.”

She laughed melodically and flipped her messy curls over her shoulder.

“I’m sure, he’s got an idea, after all this time.”

They left the closet and joined Bobby and Lottie in the kitchen. Lucas saw the moment Bobby’s face changed. One moment, he was still joking with the blonde, and another, his body straightened, and his eyes shone, and his face lit up with a smile. He couldn’t even see Kat yet, but he just _felt_ her presence.

“Hey, you,” Bobby stepped forward, lacing his fingers through Kat’s.

He said nothing more: no flirty jokes, no compliments, no ridiculous lines – his entire body spoke for him. Just the way he looked into the girl’s eyes was enough to show how much he loved her, and it was excruciating – watching someone love her so perfectly.

“Kat, you look amazing,” Lottie butted in. “Are we all ready to go yet?”

Bobby sent her a cheeky wink.

“I’m sure, Sasha would appreciate an extra pair of hands,” Bobby checked his phone. “The car is here.”

Lottie rolled her eyes, but her cheeks flushed pink at the mention of Bobby’s manager. She grubbed her wallet on a chain from the counter and snapped her fingers: “Let’s go!”

“What was that about?” Lucas leaned closer to Bobby as they all crowded in the elevator.

“Let’s just say, Lottie has a thing for dudes with a Russian accent – or one dude, pacifically,” Baker chuckled before giving physio evaluating look. “What’s up with you?”

Lucas shrugged making sure it looked believable.

“Nothing much. Canceled tomorrow’s patients so…”

“So, you’ve got no excuses not to stay with us tonight,” Bobby cut him off. “No more of this ‘staying at the hotel’ nonsense. After the opening – and the after-party – you’re staying here, that’s decided, that clear?”

Lucas chuckled,

“Yes, sir!”

Bobby’s grin got bigger as Lucas agreed: baker wasn’t sure his tone would do the trick. He knew the older man refused to stay with them whenever he spent weekends in London because he didn’t want to make things awkward for Bobby – and Bobby appreciated it. Just like he appreciated that Kat always somehow managed to make him, Bobby, a part of her and Lucas’ day, even when he was busy at the bakery.

He knew Lucas loved her. He knew it back in the Villa, and he surely knew it now.

But only with physio Kat felt comfortable, only Lucas managed to make her be honest, and Bobby wasn’t going to come in a way of that friendship. An odd, intense, sometimes a bit too close friendship that no one could’ve predicted.

He and Kat still hadn’t watched back the show, even though everyone else did that weeks ago and were now mainly giving Bobby weird looks but kept quiet. Lottie was unusually cautious with things she told him – or, around him, and slowly, t was winding him out.

Bobby took a few deep breaths as the elevator took them downstairs.

“Miss Rhodes!” Concierge caught them in the doorway. “This was just personally delivered,” He showed her a simple letter. “Would you like me to…”

She snatched the envelope from his hand unceremoniously.

“No, thank you, I’ll take it with me,” She frowned, realizing that she didn’t have a bag with her, only her work phone.

_Right, all the people who know her personal number will be at the bakery, too._

“I’ll store this for you,” Lucas took the envelope, doubled it up, and shoved into his pocket.

“Thank you, kind sir,” She teased as they all climbed into the limo.

She wasn’t okay, and he couldn’t believe no one else saw it. Lottie was chirping all the way to the bakery, so consumed by herself she clearly had no time to notice that her best friend gave her all her fake smiles and never a genuine one. Bobby was at the front line, helping her fight through her rough days, but he still expected her to be the Kat that everyone loved, flirty and sweet, and good at hiding her true feelings.

Lucas frowned to himself: it was unfair, to think of Bobby like that. Clearly, baker was the only reason she was still somewhat holding herself together. He glanced and them: Bobby’s fingers were laced through the redhead’s as their hands rested on her thigh, and their bodies were in some sort of sync, following each other’s movements unconsciously.

The ride didn’t take too long: about ten minutes later, the limo stopped in front of the flower-decorated entrance, surrounded by a bunch of photographers, teenagers, and young people, standing behind the metal bars.

“Wow,” Lucas whistled. “Is this a bakery opening or an Academy Award ceremony?”

“Sasha went a bit overboard, hadn’t he?” Bobby blushed.

“It’s all well-deserved,” Lottie patted the baker’s knee. “This stupid show did at least one good thing… well, two,” She winked at Kat. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’d like to get out of this car already.”

When the driver opened the car door for them, Lucas felt exactly like on that day he and Lottie spent at the hotel, hanging out with the rest eliminated islanders, followed by paparazzi and some random people. He took a deep breath in and climbed out, extending his arm to help Lottie.

They were just in time, it seemed like all the press and fans were already there but most of the guests hadn’t arrived yet – and Lottie smiled at the thought that she might get a chance to have a chat with the Russian before the party kicks off. She realized that she liked him exactly two weeks ago when she popped by the bakery before Kayley’s photoshoot that she had to attend as her personal makeup artist.

Sasha was sitting at one of the tables, buried under a pile of papers, and seeing him like that somehow made her feel something. Something, she hadn’t felt since the infamous kiss with Gary. Only now, finally, she felt it for someone who wasn’t pining over somebody else or wasn’t married or a complete asshole.

Lucas squeezed his eyes for a second, blinded by the flashlights, before snapping them back open to watch Kat climbing out of the car gracefully, one long leg at a time. Bobby’s grin could’ve lit half of London when their arms linked as they both walked down the red carpet, followed by screams and flashlights.

“Come over here, guys,” Bobby waved Lucas and Lottie over, and Lucas found himself pressed firmly into Kat’s side when her arm snaked around his waist.

“Hey,” She whispered before turning her face to the cameras.

She smiled softly, her famous ‘Kat smile’ as people called it.

Lucas couldn’t help but read those long comment threads and stare at all those Instagram posts that have been made while they were in the Villa.

He almost made himself watch back the show – almost. He knew Kat and Bobby never had, and it was somehow comforting. Group chats had slowly died out a few weeks ago, the only real activity started with Bobby’s official invitation to the bakery opening. Even then, the tone had changed. People were avoiding bringing up certain topics, and it started getting on Lucas’ nerves, so he had to mute all the group chats except the one with Kat and Bobby and Henrik and Rahim as the three of them were planning a little trip to Cornwall.

“Finally,” Lottie scowled when they all got inside the bakery and immediately made a beeline for Sasha, followed by grinning Bobby.

“That was…”

“That was Lottie,” Kat smirked. “Okay, let me show you around before this place gets crowded.”

She looked down at her phone.

“Kat!” Giorgos’ voice made her look up at the man and frown immediately.

“Giorgos. Oksana.”

“That’s Oksana?” Lucas whispered, watching a stunning blonde as she approached them, hanging on the Greek guy’s arm.

Kat kissed them both and turned to Lucas.

“Lucas, this is Giorgos, we used to go to school together, and his date, Oksana.”

“Pleasure to meet you both,” Lucas shook hands with Giorgos.

Giorgos measured him up with his curious look and said something about the crowd outside, dragging everyone into a small chat.

 _He definitely watched the show,_ Lucas held back a frown and focused on Kat, who smiled politely at Oksana while her body was so rigid, he could physically feel the tension.

“Excuse me, guys, could I steal Kat for a moment?” He narrowed his eyes at Oksana as she shot a glance towards Bobby.

“Yeah, mate, absolutely,” Giorgos gave the redhead a warm hug before wandering off.

“Thank you,” She entwined their fingers and tugged on his hand. “C’mon, let me show you where the magic happens.”

“The kitchen?” Lucas raised an eyebrow at her as they walked into the kitchen and Kat waved the waitresses away. “Are you calling kitchen bits magic?”

He looked deeply into her eyes until her cheeks turned red. This was the first time one of them mentioned the night they had sex in the Villa’s kitchen, even though it was just a hint, it felt like something has changed between them since they could actually joke about it now.

“What can I say, Luc,” Kat’s eyes sparkled mischievously. “I’m a fucking wizard.”

They looked at one another for a long moment before bursting with laughter. Lucas propped himself up on the counter and grabbed two champagne glasses.

“To Bobby,” He said quietly as they clinked glasses.

Kat threw her drink bank in two large gulps, frowning just a little. Lucas studied her face for a moment before grabbing her hand and pulling her closer.

“Hey,” He bit on the inner side of his cheek to calm down. “You know I’m here for you, right?”

She nodded, stepping closer, and nuzzled her face into his chest, resting her hands on his thighs. Having her in his arms felt so right, even though it was all sorts of wrong. She will never belong to him, he will always be just the guy who could’ve fought harder for her…

Her hand snaked its way into his pocket, and Kat fished out the letter, wiggling in his arms so she could tear the envelope open.

“Who’s it from?” Lucas looked at the address. “New York?”

“It’s my parents’ address,” Kat bit down on her lower lip. “I guess, I should just read it, rip off the band-aid, right?”

She didn’t look that certain, and Lucas gently pressed his lips to her temple.

“You don’t have to do it now.”

“If I don’t, I’ll spend the entire evening thinking about it.”

Physio nodded, and she threw the envelope away. It was just an expensive-looking invitation card, and Lucas couldn’t help but read it.

_Fuck._

“Their thirties anniversary,” Kat breathed out, stunned. “I can’t believe I’ve forgotten it’s this month. And they want to see me with my vis-à-vis.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A


	10. I need you to need me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "...Hear it first in my head  
> See us spinning like a silhouette  
> Like dreamers chase a world beyond  
> I taste your taste, I sing your song..."
> 
> [Take Me With You - Fleurie]

“Alright?” Gary flopped on the velvet couch next to Kat, stretching his legs.

She looked up with her unfocused eyes and managed a little forced smile. They were now hidden from everyone by the two giant palm trees, and Gary scooched closer to the girl, wrapping his arm around her shoulders.

“You really should start eating,” He noted, feeling her prominent bones under his hand as she snuggled closer to him.

“I should start doing many things.”

She frowned to herself and shook her head, shrugging off her mood.

“How’s everything, Garemenator? Chelsea looks extremely full of herself these days.”

He grinned, letting her off the hook, and nodded: “Things are pretty solid with her. Nan loves her…” He stumbled over his words and clamped his mouth shut.

“What is it?” Kat frowned feeling his hesitation. “Just tell me, I’ll do whatever I can…”

Gary laughed softly, pulling the girl into a bearhug.

“That’s our Kat,” He said softly. “It’s nothing bad, really. Just… well, nan would like to meet you if you ever around, that’s it.”

A smile spread across her lips as the redhead nudged him on a shoulder. “You dork, I thought it was something horrible. And Martha told me that herself a couple of weeks ago.”

“Are you… talking to my nan?” Gary’s eyes widened and for the first time tonight, Kat laughed genuinely.

“Oh, god,” She grabbed on his shoulder. “You make it sound as if I’m hitting on her!”

She needed this, needed to have a stupid chat and share a laugh, after this endless night of horrors, she was just happy for this momentary relief. Gary’s dumb expression was so precious she wished she could take a picture of it and send it to his nan.

“I’m just surprised,” Gary rolled his eyes, but he was also grinning. “Though I shouldn’t really be, should I?”

Both of them went back to that time they were so close to hooking up in the pool in the bright sunlight, and Gary told her that his nan was probably making all those memes about her, praising the redhead and wanting her for a round of gin.

“Martha just knows I’m amazing,” Kat grinned, shoving those memories away. “And I’m glad she and Chels are getting along.”

They both went silent for a long minute, listening to the sounds of the party. Most of the guests have left and Bobby dismissed the stuff, only Sasha stayed to celebrate with the former islanders, to Lottie’s excitement. Sure, Giorgos and Oksana weren’t in a rush, either.

Kat had to shake this feeling off as she looked at Gary.

“Hey, what do you say if we dance for a bit?”

The blond guy immediately jumped to his feet, and she smiled at him, accepting his extended hand.

“Oh, here they are!” Ibrahim’s voice cut through the music.

“We’ve started worrying,” Shannon added. “Where have you guys been?”

“Literally right over there,” Kat pointed towards the palm trees. “What’s up?”

Her eyes scanned the room as she searched for Bobby but couldn’t find him anywhere. Chelsea bored through the crowd and wrapped her arms around Gary and Kat, hanging on both of them drunkenly.

“Chels, are you wasted?” Gary’s eyebrows arched.

“A little,” She giggled. “Bobby has the best gin ever!”

She hiccupped and giggled again, and Gary rolled his eyes. “Mate, you’re so pissed. C’mon, let’s go catch some air.”

Kat watched them as Gary walked his girl outside and helped her sit down on the wide steps at the doorway, frowning a little. It was so unlike Bobby, to just disappear in the middle of his own party, and he was so on edge the entire day… She grabbed one of the trays with empty glasses and made her way to the backrooms, feeling her heart beating faster with each step.

She was ready to push the kitchen door open when she heard the voices.

“… ever since,” She’d recognized this sickeningly sweet voice anywhere and stopped dead, listening in. “Don’t you think it’s not a coincidence we’re both here, in London, and we’ve met through friends…”

“A shit ton of people move to London every year,” Bobby’s voice sounded a bit broken. “And I wouldn’t exactly call Giorgos your f _riend_.”

There was some shuffling in the kitchen and more whispering, and probably, she should’ve stayed and listened, as any other girl would’ve done that in her place – but she just pushed the kitchen door open. Oksana’s body twisted nervously to the sound as she moved back from Bobby, and the baker himself looked like he was ready to sink into the earth any moment now.

“Excuse me,” Kat put the tray down. “Chels got drunk off your gin, Gary’s probably gonna take her to the hotel now.”

With these words, she spun on her heel and left the kitchen, unwilling to hear any explanations. She wasn’t mad, not with Bobby, but she wasn’t in a mood to hear more of Oksana’s crap – so, she left, letting the two of them finish the conversation.

“Hey, Kat,” Priya caught her in her tracks. “Gary just said he’s gonna take Chels back to the hotel, Rahim and Shannon are leaving, too, they’ve got a flight to catch but they wanted to say bye to you and Bobby.”

Kat spotted the couple as they were moving slowly from one group of people to another, saying their goodbyes.

“Bobby’s in the kitchen,” She gently unwrapped herself from Priya’s arms. “Sorry, I’m a bit tired, I’m gonna grab some air.”

The older girl frowned a little but nodded, and the redhead let out a sigh of relief: thankfully, Priya knew exactly when to leave someone alone. She moved hastily across the improvised dancefloor to give Ram a quick hug.

“Hey,” He stroked her hair. “Are you okay, Kat?”

_No, I’m fucking not, I’m dying here._

“Yeah, just needed some air. Have a safe flight, guys, okay?” She kissed him on the cheek and hastily made her way to the back door before someone could stop her again.

She pushed the door open, making the two men jump out of its way.

“Fuck, Kat,” Lucas breathed out.

He and Giorgos were smoking, talking quietly when the door flew open almost hitting them both. Just a quick glance at Kat was enough to see that she was absolutely fuming, and Lucas glanced at Giorgos, silently asking him to give them a moment.

“Hold that door,” Giorgos smirked. “I’m gonna grab some more of those tarts before they’re all gone.”

Kat let him in and shut the door, leaning her back against it. Finally, she could stop pretending and just let her body relax for a second. Finally, she was around someone who didn’t need her fake smile and perfect posture, someone who could see through her act, so she had no need to put one up.

Slowly, his hand pulled her closer until her body was pressed against his, and Lucas gently wrapped his arms around her, noticing how fragile she felt in his embrace. Has she not been eating at all? Has anyone else noticed? Was he even in a position to share his concerns with anyone?

“Shh, kitten, it’ll be okay,” His hand was stroking her back gently, as the girl sniffed gently into his chest. “I promise you, it will get better.”

How many times did he tell her these words? How many times she’s been crying in his arms, unable to stop because he was the only person in the world that she could do it with? How many times had he punched the wall because he was the one who let her go, the one who ruined what they could’ve had?

He had no idea of how much time had passed as they just stood in a barely lit back alley wrapped into each other’s arms – to him, it was not enough, it was never enough of her. The back door flew open again, and Bobby stepped outside, trying to adjust his eyes to almost complete darkness after the bright light.

Kat pulled away from Lucas slightly, rubbing the tears off her cheeks, and Bobby’s heart sunk in his chest.

“Kat?” He called brokenly. “What’s going on? Are you okay?”

“I’ll leave you two,” Lucas carefully unwrapped her from his arms and squeezed Bobby’s shoulder before getting back inside.

She couldn’t bring herself to look up at Bobby, she hated herself so much for this meltdown, hated that he saw her like that on his big day. She should’ve worked better on keeping her shit together, she should’ve taken some more pills, she should’ve stayed at the party… stray thoughts were running through her head as she tried to recompose herself.

She was too broken to speak, so Bobby did the only thing he knew would help.

With straightforward confidence that he’d mastered in the past couple of months, he took a step forward and grabbed the girl by the waist, drawing their bodies closer. His eyes locked with hers for a moment before he closed the distance between them with a rough, demanding kiss.

Her hands immediately slid up his arms, grabbing on his shoulders as if he was the only thing that could’ve keep her afloat in the ocean that she’s been drowning in. Her lips parted letting his tongue slid inside, and for the first time since the beginning of the night, Bobby felt like he was finally not spiraling down anymore.

He only wanted his own bakery, he never wished for _this,_ all the cameras and people approaching him on the streets. He just wanted to do what he liked during the day and get back to the woman he loved in the evening. He wanted it to be simple – but he happened to fall in love with the most complex girl on Earth.

Kat pushed him into the wall, pressing harder against him, and he felt her heart beating against his chest frantically. He wanted her so much, his body was so drawn to her, just like his heart and mind, his entire existence only had meaning because he had her, because she was in his life. Without her, his life meant nothing, he knew that because he’d lived twenty-four years’ worth of nothing without her.

Suddenly, her movements slowed down, and she pulled slightly back, still holding him in her shaking hands tightly.

“What?” His breath stuttered. “Is something wrong?”

His body ached for her, he just needed to feel her, make her come undone, fall into pieces with her…

“No,” She bit on her bottom lip hard before continuing. “Yes. I don’t know.”

She sighed heavily before pulling away and straightening her dress. Something in her face has changed, and Bobby’s heart skipped a beat and then another, and another, until he felt like it was hard to breathe.

“Please, Kat, just talk to me,” He grabbed her hand, too scared of this sudden change. “Did I do something wrong?”

He’s changed so much since their time in the villa that she completely forgot how deeply insecure he was. She looked at his fingers gripping on her hand franticly and then dragged her gaze to his face, looking deeply into his beautiful amber eyes, now filled with almost horror.

Softly, she stroked her free hand across his cheek reassuringly and leaned in to press the gentlest kiss to his lips. Seeing him so vulnerable and raw made her heart squeeze painfully in her chest.

“I just need to tell you something,” She said quietly. “That letter I got on our way here, it was from my parents. It’s an invitation to their anniversary, for both of us.”

Bobby let out a small sigh of relief before his brow furrowed.

“Anniversary?”

“Thirty years of being the ultimate power couple,” Her face twitched a little. “RSVPing with a ‘no’ isn’t an option. I have to be there, and I will understand perfectly if you won’t go, it will be hell you’ve never signed up for.”

Bobby pressed his hand roughly to her lips. “Shut up, you eejit,” He whispered. “What the fuck are you even talking about? Of course, I’ll go with you.”

Her body relaxed immediately in his arms, and Bobby’s heart grew a size in his chest at yet another proof that she needed him just as much as he needed her. Just her reaction to his words was enough to make his heart flutter with excitement as he pulled her closer and pressed his lips to her forehead.

“I’ll always be there for you, Red, I hope you know.”

She nodded slowly, whipping the sudden tears away.

“I just know that it will be horrible,” She said quietly. “Everyone’s going to be there, and most of those people will be way worse than my parents… because in their own, unhealthy way, they kind of love me. But the others – that’s another story. I just don’t want you to go through the UES initiation.”

“I will be there with you – in my books, it’s a time well spent,” Bobby smiled gently at her.

“Well, someone should re-write those damn books for you,” She smirked back. “Because whoever wrote them, was a masochist.”

He laughed at her joke, spotting little sparkles in her eyes that weren’t there the entire night, no matter how hard she’s been trying to pretend. And knowing that it was he who brought that spark back even for this long felt good.

“I think we should get back to the others,” Kat said a few minutes later, kissing gently across his cheekbone.

“I’ve got to tell you something,” Bobby frowned. “That’s actually why I was looking for you.”

He sighed, playing with her hair aimlessly as he tried to get his thoughts straight. “Oksana just made a move on me. In the kitchen. Right before you walked in.”

“Oh?” She raised an eyebrow politely. “So, is this where you tell me you want to walk into the sunset with a Russian girl?”

Bobby scowled.

“Har har. This is where I tell you that I told her to fuck off.”

“You so did not,” She rolled her eyes, but a large part of her wished that was exactly the case and there was an actual recording of that conversation.

“I told her that it will never happen and that I don’t think we should be around each other. Not now, not later. Including the times Giorgos comes to visit the bakery – or any other occasion we might ‘accidentally’ run into one another.”

Kat held back a sigh of relief and shook her head.

“I don’t want you to stop talking to someone just because of me.”

“Well, if you don’t like me being a good boyfriend, think of it as of me being a good friend to Giorgos. And you, miss I –don’t-share-friends,” Bobby winked at the girl before pulling her closer in. “I’m sorry that it took too long. I was being a fucking eejit this past couple of weeks.”

“It’s fine,” She teasingly dragged her mouth across his jawline, feeling his light stubble scratching her lips gently. “I got used to your eejit-ness.”

He nudged her playfully with his nose, bringing their bodies closer for a long, drawn-out kiss.

“So, when is the day X?” He wondered a few minutes later.

“That’s the best part,” Kat smirked grimly. “Their anniversary day happens to be my birthday,”

“But it’s…”

“In two weeks,” She finished his sentence. “Changed your mind yet? I bet you could still make up with Oksana and…”

He pressed his hand to her lips again. “Shut up already,” Bobby whispered gently. “Stop with this shit. You had me at that fucking ‘hello’ on our first day in the villa, so… just, shut up, okay?”

Her body trembled in his arms, and he saw the little flames of desire on the bottom of her eyes, and his body reacted immediately, the same moment, reaching for her almost automatically. He wished he could take her now, be with her, make her cry his name – but instead, he pressed his forehead against hers, breathing deeply until both their breathes stopped hitching.

“So, I guess, I should start learning all the names for the silverware and master waltz?”

“Yeah, that wouldn’t hurt,” Kat chuckled. “But also… I think it’s the time we watch that stupid thing back because trust me – everyone who’ll be there watched it twice by now and will make sure to bring it up at the worst moment possible.”

Bobby swallowed hard and nodded: they’ve been stalling enough, giving themselves a chance to settle into their new life but now, it was the time to open Pandora’s box.

“Buckle up, silly Scot,” Kat said gently. “I’m taking you straight to Hell.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A


	11. I'm just a speck inside your hand.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "...When I could only see the floor  
> You made my window a door  
> So when they say they don't believe  
> I hope that they see you in me..."
> 
> [Be Somebody - Thousand Foot Krutch]

Heavy, endless waterfalls of rain were running down the panoramic windows, turning the view into a kaleidoscope of blurred images and lights. Bobby sighed heavily, fiddling with the glass stem as he waited for Kat to get out of the shower. He turned away from the window and stared at the coffee table, now laden with bawls of fruits and wine that he’d prepared for their nightly viewing party.

They started watching the show back a week ago, the next day after the bakery opening, and they only got to the evening of day four.

“They’ve drawn that shit out,” Bobby mumbled to himself as he leaned his back against the window and closed his eyes, listening to the silence only interrupted with the distant sounds of running water: Kat never closed the bathroom door.

He smiled softly at the thought of his girlfriend, and his heart swelled in his chest as he imagined her long auburn locks falling onto her face as the streams of water run down her body. Maybe, he thought of her unbecomingly often: every moment of every day, even when he wasn’t thinking of her, she was always there, inside of him. She was on his mind and in his heart, with the sounds of music, with the scent of vanilla and jasmine, with the gloomy grey light and the taste of chocolate – she never left him, not even for a split of a second.

She was there whenever he needed her, so beautiful and perfect it was sometimes almost physically painful to look at her.

A sound of text snapped Bobby out of his thoughts, and he pulled his phone out of the pocket.

**Ready yet?**

The baker smirked and pressed ‘call’.

“Hey,” Lucas picked up after the second ring, his face slightly blurred.

“Hey,” Bobby flopped down on the couch almost spilling wine all over himself. “Oops,” He put the glass onto a marble coaster. “What’s up?”

Lucas put his laptop slightly aside and reached for his glass. “Nothing much, have a client tomorrow at eight, that guy from the Olympic swimming team. How’s it going at the bakery? The hashtag went viral from what I’ve seen.”

Bobby rolled his eyes: Sasha, being himself, decided that ‘it’d be cool to engage with your fans’ and made Bobby create a contest, the winner gets a chance to visit the bakery and spend two hours with the famous baker. It was an understatement of a century to say that Bobby himself found this idea horrible and hated the very thought of spending two hours with some crazy fangirl.

“At least, Lottie seems pretty pleased with how it goes with her and Sasha,” He said finally.

“Yeah, she texted this morning, asked me if I know anything about horse racing,” Lucas tsked. “I wonder where she’d got the idea I would be informed on the subject.”

Bobby’s lips curled into a grin, and the physio rolled his eyes.

“What?” The baker asked innocently. “You’re posh, it makes sense.”

It was almost funny, how easily it was for them to just chat as if they weren’t deeply in love with the same woman. Sometimes, Bobby wondered if their other friends found their relationship strange: he wasn’t blind, he caught those sideway glances even though no one told him anything. Even the fact that they’ve decided to watch the show back together brought a concerned look to Gary’s face when Bobby mentioned it a couple of days ago.

The crane operator didn’t say much, just asked Bobby if he was alright, but about an hour later, Ram called him, and his casual voice wouldn’t have tricked even a child.

Bobby realized it was odd: being friends with his rival, but he couldn’t see the physio like that. Not after all those times Lucas had been there for Kat when Bobby couldn’t, not after all the times, he’d proven himself to be a friend not just to her, but to Bobby, too.

“So, you’ve booked the flight yet?” Lucas wondered after a short pause.

“This morning,” Bobby nodded trying to calm his suddenly quickened pulse: every time he thought about meeting Kat’s family, he had a little panic attack. “And a hotel suite.”

Lucas slightly frowned, thinking over his next words.

“That’s for the better, that you won’t be staying at her parents’,” He said finally, watching Bobby’s reaction closely.

“Yeah, I know,” Bobby nodded, chewing on his bottom lip. “If I was ever to introduce her to my family, I would’ve booked a hotel as far as possible, preferably, in another city.”

“That bad, huh?”

Bobby shrugged: he preferred not to talk about his family, just like Kat, but for a different reason. His family screwed him over and never gave a shit about what had happened to him until they saw him on the telly.

Before they could carry on with the conversation, Kat walked into the living room toweling her hair.

“You’re watching already?” She stopped behind Bobby, tossed the towel aside, and weaved her arms around Bobby’s neck leaning forward. “Hey, Luc,” She smiled softly at her friend and he saluted her with a glass of white wine.

“No, we were waiting for you,” The baker grabbed her hand and kissed her knuckles gently.

She joined him on the couch crossing her long legs and took off her sweater: human radiator Bobby was enough to keep her warm even wearing just a tank top. Bobby handed her a glass of wine and all three of them went quiet, looking at their screens.

It was the day Lucas and Henrik arrived in the Villa, and it was strange to think how back then she saw the dark-haired man and had no idea that he’ll become one of her closest friends. She couldn’t even think of that when she gave him that little half-smile while staring in his dark eyes.

“Oh god, look at that,” She waved at the screen. “Who thought of filming me from that angle, I look barely legal.”

Lucas chuckled: “It’s adorable you think it’s the angle.”

“Oi!” Bobby jumped when she elbowed him. “What did I do?”

“I couldn’t slap him, but someone had to get punished,” Kat smirked, pulling Bobby in for a cuddle. “And you’re just so punishable,” She whispered into his ear, sending goosebumps all over his body.

So far, it wasn’t anywhere close to a disaster that she’d imagined. The first few days were mild on drama and most people were still okay with each other, except Lottie and Priya: watching those two bickering every time they got in the same physical space seemed almost surreal.

“Lucas. He’s exactly the type of guy I’d go for but each of them turned out to be a fucking psychopath,” Kat on TV said to Bobby as she as sitting in his lap, and Kat’s face flushed red when she heard herself saying those words.

“I don’t even know what’s more painful: being practically called a psychopath or watching Bobby’s face as you sat on top of him asking for dating advice,” Lucas sniggered, and all three of them burst into laughter.

She had no idea how the three of them managed to push through this without it becoming weird between them. She, Lucas, Bobby... Their friends thought they were insane, that Bobby was crazy for letting her hang out with Lucas as much. They thought she was inconsiderate and Luc should’ve backed off - and a small part of her hated them for that.

If only they could _understand_...

On the screen, Gary was telling Bobby that he deserved a chance with her, and Kat’s hand found Scot’s automatically, as if trying to compensate all the pain she’d brought to him by being so oblivious to his feelings. It was still early days for the people on the screen, but she knew that soon enough the drama will break away and they won’t be sitting there joking anymore.

Now, she could barely remember those first weeks on the island, everything felt as if it happened to someone else and she had nothing to do with that always smiling girl who was the heart of the villa. She looked at that girl and saw a stranger – she was nothing like her. That girl was the light and she was the dark, gloomy sky.

She snapped out of her thoughts at the end of the episode, and Lucas was at the Beach Hut talking about their date.

“Out of everyone here I’m only interested in her,” TV Lucas said. “And I think it’s mutual, the date went great, she’s an incredible woman, and honestly, she and Gary won’t last.”

They kept watching the show in silence, one episode after another up until Kat suddenly paused the video.

“What?” Bobby looked up at her sleepily: it was already after midnight.

“Enough for one night,” She shrugged glancing at the screen. “We all have to get up early in the morning.”

“It’s only ten minutes left,” Lucas noted. “Let’s just finish the episode.”

“Yeah,” Bobby pressed ‘play’ again, and the redhead sunk deeper into the couch.

She remembered that day: the kiss and tell challenge, and she remembered what she’d done. When Marisol and Rocco used the challenge to get off with each other, she used Bobby for some kind of relief.

“I need to kiss the girl, who’s been caught skinny dipping." TV Lucas read the card and walked straight to Kat, no hesitation, and pulled her into a full-on snog.

As she watched herself kissing him back, she could _feel_ the way his lips moved against hers, she could taste his mouth, and it made her pulse quicken and her breath stutter. She kissed Lucas many times after that and completely forgot they kissed during the challenge but somehow, she just felt the same she felt back then: surprise and excitement and guilt for feeling that way.

“I still can’t believe they went there,” Bobby’s lips twisted in disgusted as he watched Marisol and Rocco snogging each other faces off for the second time.

“She was just desperate,” Kat shrugged dreading the moment she sees herself kissing Bobby and then just skip off and hide at the Beach Hut until the girls found her.

“She should’ve spent more time reflecting on why she was everyone’s last resort instead of first hitting on you and then bitching about you,” Lucas said firmly. “I completely forgot she tried grafting you that first week or so.”

“Yeah, I think we’d all rather forget about that.”

On the screen, Kat clutched at Bobby’s back pulling him as close as possible, kissing him deeply and painfully in a selfish attempt to make herself feel slightly less shitty. When the couple on the screen pulled apart, she saw it: the hurt in her baker’s face. She hurt him mercilessly and just ran away.

With the memories of Lucas’ kiss still lingering, she gently pressed her lips to Bobby’s in a soft, tender kiss.

“What’s that for?” He beamed when she pulled away.

“You,” She brushed his cheek gently with her fingers, preparing for what was coming next. “And it’s also a bribe. I was being a bitch that day, so like, don’t get too mad.”

Her heart almost stopped beating as she saw herself in the Beach Hut, her face still twisted in anger mixed with hurt – she hurt herself by hurting Bobby, and she felt it. Even back then, she already felt it, even though she had no idea what exactly that feeling was.

“Yeah, I kissed Bobby but why on earth would I get together with him?” On-screen Kat leaned back against the chair. “He’s my best friend and I love him a lot, but he needs to finally put those adult pants on unless he wants to find himself fifty and single… I think I like Lucas.”

She remembered those words and she remembered that there were more between those two sentences but the way they edited it… It made her stomach tie into a knot as she kept staring at the credits after the episode. Bobby knew she said those words thanks to one of the challenges – but knowing that was different from actually _hearing_ her say it.

And after that, they had to add that thing about Lucas…

“So, tomorrow at the same time?” Bobby asked in a casual voice.

“Yeah,” Lucas looked between him and Kat. “Night, guys.”

“Talk to you later, mate,” Bobby finished the call and stretched out, yawning. “Time to hit the hay?” He looked at his girlfriend questioningly, and she just nodded and followed him to the bedroom.

Bobby turned off the lights and climb into bed, and his arm wrapped around her waist immediately pulling the redhead closer to him. His other hand took a gentle hold of her chin coaxing her face closer.

“Stop it,” He whispered into space between them.

“What?”

Kat’s mouth went suddenly dry when Bobby’s hand guided her leg to rest on his warm thigh, and his fingers pushed past the hem of her shorts.

“Stop being worried that watching this stupid show will make me upset – that watching _you_ will upset me. I don’t care about the past,” Bobby’s fingers brushed along her slit and rubbed her clit gently as he continued speaking. “I have you here now. I’m the one who’s sleeping in the same bed with you.”

He suddenly rolled over, so he was on top of her, his knees pressed into the mattress on both sides of the girl. He tugged on her top and she yanked it off arching her back above the bed, and her wild curls cascaded down her shoulders like a waterfall, hypnotizing the man. She was so beautiful, so perfect, so _his_ – and with each passing day, his need for her kept growing even though it seemed impossible to need someone so fucking much.

“It’s me who’s touching you now,” He ran his fingers across her chest and down her stomach and moved down her body to take off her shorts.

He pushed her legs open and leaned closer to drag his mouth up her inner thigh drawing a soft moan out of his girlfriend. He needed to make sure she knew that there was nothing in the world that would’ve changed the way he felt about her.

She came into his life and made him who he was now: he used to be just this scared little boy inside of a man’s body, and she twisted and turned and destroyed that boy and made him stronger, better. She saw something in him that he didn’t even know was there, she saw who he really was, and she helped him show that person to the whole world.

He could still remember the moment it all began, on a sunny day in the Spanish countryside in a house full of strangers. He was so anxious he felt sick the entire morning as he waited for a car in the hotel room, playing all the horrible scenarios in his head. He knew love was off the table for him but he still couldn’t help the tight knot in the pit of his stomach as he approached a group of four guys who looked like they spent all day long lifting heavy stuff.

He was so self-conscious, so insecure, so unready for this ‘adulting’ thing – and then, he saw her.

He didn’t need to see that episode to remember the first time he saw Kat. She strolled out of the Villa gracefully in her bright-red tiger stripe swimsuit, barefoot and barefaced, a little soft smile playing on her perfect sensual lips, her fire-red hair cascading down her shoulders and back – and he just knew it was _her_. She was the one meant for him, the reason he was born.

He still remembered in all details how his breath hitched and how he hated himself for that horrible line he threw her way – and he never expected her to laugh at it. He didn’t need the audio to remember the melodic sound of her laughter and didn’t need the video to remember the way her emerald-green eyes burned into his. And he remembered how everything inside of him crumbled down when she picked Gary, the girl whose name he didn’t catch chose someone else and he felt like everything was ruined.

Kat’s hand snaked into his hair pulling slightly as Bobby sucked her clit into his mouth and his fingers curled upwards inside of her, making her back arch above the bed. She was moaning and writhing beneath him, and his body went weightless with love for her.

He felt so disconnected, so out of place when they just met, he felt like he did not belong – and she saw past his clown mask as if she looked through the glass, and she saw _him_. She saw the person who he was supposed to become, not the person everyone else saw in him. Since that first day in the Villa, she was the one who kept pushing him to open up, to show the side of him he kept hidden from everyone including himself.

She found a way to connect him, to ground him – and to ascend him, to make him feel as if he was floating in the skies. The pain of not having her the way he wanted almost ruined him – but then she came and saved him and gave him the wings and helped him look up from the ground and see the world around him.

She could’ve done anything, and it would never change the way he felt about her. Nothing in the world could’ve made him stop loving her, he’d loved her even if she murdered him, he’d loved her even if she ripped his heart out of his chest and stabbed it with a knife – he’d loved her even after his death. He’d loved her even if she never belonged to him.

Kat’s legs wrapped around him pulling Bobby up, and she met him with a deep, urgent kiss while her hand guided him inside of her, guided him home. She was inside of him, she lived in his bones and was running in his veins with blood, when people looked at him, they could see her. She was the sparks in his amber eyes, the smile on his lips, the confidence in his movements – she was his shield and his guidance, she was _him_.

“I love you,” He whispered brokenly as he came deep inside of her, and she followed him the same moment, biting on his shoulder to muffle her cries.

He didn’t need her to say those words back to him – she said them once and she _showed_ it to him every single day. He didn’t care who she’s been with before, now, she was there, trembling in his arms, looking deeply into his eyes with so much love and adoration, he wasn’t sure he deserved a half of it.

Bobby rolled over and pulled Kat closer. She nuzzled her face into his neck, and the familiar scent of jasmine and vanilla filled his lungs lulling him into sleep. He was already asleep when Kat pressed a gentle kiss to his shoulder and left the room quietly, wiping the tears off her face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A


	12. Keep me where you hide your second sight.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I honestly don't know why this story is taking me this long to update but I'm grateful for everyone who's sticking around ♥️

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "...Will you hold on, my love  
> Even in a time of trouble?  
> I want to hold on, my love  
> Even in times of trouble..."
> 
> [Where Do Lovers Go? - Ghostly Kisses]

“Two lattes, a bobbyfish, and an apple tart coming your way, ladies,” Bobby smiled at two giggling girls and turned away to pass the order to start the coffee machine.

It was another Sasha’s brilliant idea, for him to work in the hall – again, to attract customers, and Bobby couldn’t help but wonder if _this_ was actually his dream or a nightmare. He didn’t mind being the centre of attention but not like that, not when he had the love of his life waiting for him to get back home. Not when all of their friends kept sending him cryptic texts whenever he mentioned watching yet another episode of the show.

They were halfway through the season, and finally, he started realizing why exactly former islanders found his friendship with Lucas questionable, at best.

During the weekend, they binged through all Casa Amor episodes, and Kat almost buried Bobby in her tears when the physio drove back to Oxford last night. His entire body was sore and aching from seeing her on the screen, torn and barely speaking to anyone, crying in the Beach Hut – and she wasn’t able to look at him getting drunk and carried downstairs, so broken because of _her_.

In his mind, those memories were longtime gone, replaced with every moment of happiness that she’s given him – but for her, it was torture, seeing him in pieces, ruined by his love for her. they both couldn’t sleep through the night, holding each other tightly, grasping on one another as if they were the lifeboats in the middle of the ocean.

In the morning, she woke him up gently, the way only she could, and Bobby’s heart almost stopped in his chest at the sight of her swollen eyes with deep dark circles. He just wanted to stay with her, to cradle her in his arms until she believed he’s been never happier than he was with her – but she wouldn’t let him, knowing how important his presence at the bakery was.

“We’re leaving in less than a week,” she reminded when he tried to protest. “You should use this time to build up a customer base. I’ll stop by around lunchtime.”

And so, he was there, waiting for her. Bobby put two cups of coffee and pastries onto a small tray and brought it to the table.

“Voila,” he sent the girls a smile and walked to the little table behind the palm trees that Sasha used as his office. “Hey.”

Bobby flopped onto the couch next to his manager, and the older man looked up from the paper in front of him.

“Hi,” Sasha pushed one of the documents to him. “Check if everything’s correct, and I’ll make the order tonight.”

Bobby’s eyes followed through the lines of text, and he nodded. “Everything looks good, just make sure to order Mascarpone…”

“From that Italian place, I remember,” Sasha rolled his eyes. “How’s work going?”

“Terrific,” the baker grimaced as they both heard the door open, letting a group of people into the bakery.

“What are you waiting for?” Sasha raised an eyebrow slightly. “Chop chop.”

Rolling his eyes so hard his head ached, Bobby left the man to it and returned behind the counter where his new barista, Dan, was already taking orders from a group of school kids who couldn’t care less about Bobby, and the baker sighed with relief. His eyes wandered across the room and stopped at the large windows. It was unusually warm and sunny for late October, and he wondered what the weather in New York would be like when they’re finally there.

 _Frosty,_ he chuckled to himself, imagining meeting Kat’s parents. He still couldn’t fully believe this was happening, and the way his girlfriend was getting ready for their trip wasn’t helping his sudden anxiety. When she brought a new suitcase full of clothes that she picked for him, Bobby finally snapped.

“What’s this?” he pointed towards one of the piles.

“Have you suddenly gone blind?” she retorted, puffing a strand of hair away from her face. “What does it look like? Clothes.”

“I can see _that,_ ” Bobby’s eyes rolled back into his head. “Why would I need them?”

“Because if you show up before my parents wearing this,” she pointed towards his pale-mint jeans and a white t-shirt. “My dead will ask you to bring him his clubs since you look like someone who works at the golf club.”

The irritation dripping from her words made Bobby’s eyes snap up at her, and he took a step forward crossing his arms over his chest. “Is that so?”

“Try looking in the mirror,” Kat blurted out before she could’ve stopped herself and went quiet.

They both went silent, unsure of how this bickering has even begun. They never had fights, after that time at the rooftop terrace of the Villa, they never had anything even remotely close to a fight – and now, neither of them knew what to do. The redhead took a deep breath in and stepped closer to her boyfriend, touching his arm gently.

“I’m sorry.”

“No,” he shook his head, wrapping her into a tight embrace. “I’m sorry. I’m just nervous, I don’t want to embarrass you.”

Kat looked in his eyes: “That’s impossible. You’re perfect.”

They’ve made up, but Bobby couldn’t help this barely audible voice of fear whispering that they were just normal people who fight over stupid shit. He shook it off, noticing that the weather outside the windows has changed in just a few minutes that he let his mind wander turning the bright day into a dark, gloomy evening.

The baker looked at his phone and then dragged his gaze to the glass door, hoping that Kat will just magically appear in the doorway.

It flew open a moment later, letting the redhead in with a gust of cold wind. She saw him the same moment and slowly walked towards the counter, tossing her long messy curls over her shoulder. He took her in, her knee-length dark mauve silk wrap-dress and leather jacket, and suede stiletto-heel shoes that seemed unnecessary, with her mile-long legs… His face lit up with a smile when she finally stopped in front of him, leaning against the counter.

“Welcome to Totally Succulent,” Bobby grinned. “What can I get for you?”

She looked at him, and his breath hitched when her emerald-green eyes turned almost black as she pushed herself even closer to him.

“You work in customer service, is that right?’”

Her voice was low and viscous, like melted caramel, and Bobby swallowed hard and nodded, unable to take his eyes off the girl before him.

“Well,” she said slowly, arching an eyebrow slowly as she looked at him through her lashes. “I’m a customer. Service me, Bobby.”

His heart skipped a beat when her words finally reached his brain and lit up like a neon sign inside of his head. Bobby’s mouth went suddenly dry as he nodded and whispered something to Dan before pushing the door to the backrooms and beckoning Kat over. She followed him as if pulled by a string, her movements mirroring his, and her eyes sparkling in the dim light.

He pushed the stuff restroom door open and pulled the girl inside, pinning her into the wall the second he locked the door behind them. His tongue pushed her lips open, slipping inside her mouth, and a low groan escaped his throat when her hands tangled in his hair, pulling roughly to get him closer.

A spark of fire went through his body when her hips bucked forward, pressing into his, and one of Kat’s hands slid between their bodies to cup him through the fabric of his jeans. He shooed her hand and pulled her towards the sink counter without breaking the kiss. Whenever she was around, his body was going insane for her touch, for the feeling of her skin on his, for her smell, taste, her _everything_.

The closeness of her cold body was driving him mad, the way her fingers wrapped around his neck as she moved her kisses up to his ear, and her hot breath contrasted with her ice-cold hands when her teeth grazed his lobe.

Hastily, he ripped the jacket off her, leaning to kiss a path down her neck, his fingers shaking as he unbuttoned her dress impatiently, needed to see more of her. His lips found a tiny birthmark on the side of her left breast before moving further down her stomach, leaving a trail of wet, open-mouthed kisses on her soft skin.

She was the trouble he was in, a deadly poison that he couldn’t get enough of, the only reason for his existence, his everything. Bobby’s fingers finally reached the bottom of her dress as he dropped to his knees before her. He looked up at the girl with his hungry, blazing eyes, and just this sight of him made her core pulse with desire.

He took hold of her ankle and started kissing his way up her leg slowly, agonizingly slowly, to the point she whined just above him, unable to wait any longer.

He rarely saw her like that, out of control because of need, and it was his favorite sight, he could watch her yearning for him forever – but instead, he pushed her thighs open, and her heat burned his face when he licked a stripe against her.

Her body shuddered under his touch, and she pushed her fingers through his dreads, grasping a fistful of hair in her hand, taking control of him. He grabbed her hips to pull her closer and rested her legs over his shoulders burying his face in her, alternating broad licks with pointed flickers of his tongue while his hands kneaded the muscles of her thighs roughly.

A loud moan escaped her lips when his tongue slid inside of her, and her hands pressed onto the back of his neck holding him in place. Her walls were pulsing around his tongue, and she jerked her hips forward, again and again, fucking his face, and he couldn’t restrain himself any longer.

One of his hands moved down to unzip his jeans and take a grip of himself, stroking his hard length in time with the movements of his tongue. He could barely breathe but he buried his face even deeper in her, her desire dripping from his tongue and down his chin. He moved his free hand to replace his tongue with two of his fingers while he sucked her clit into his mouth ungently, sending her over the edge.

Her mouth opened in a silent scream when she came all over him, sucking his fingers deeper inside of her, and Bobby almost followed, growling into her as the sharp stiletto heel dug into his back painfully.

She pulled roughly on his hair making him look up, her walls still pulsing all over his fingers. Her eyes were wild when she pulled harder, making him get up. Her body was still spasming and trembling when he entered her roughly, and she pushed her hips forward, taking him fully. His mouth found her lips as he thrust into her, unable to control himself, filling her completely.

Her teeth grazed his bottom lip before she sucked it into her mouth, eliciting a low, desperate groan from somewhere deep in his throat, and his mind lost control over his body. He pushed her back until she was half-lying, her head and shoulders pressed into the wall behind her, and her back arched, and took a hold of her neck, steadying himself to move even faster.

Her eyes rolled back into her head at the sudden asphyxia, and he felt the muscles of her throat work hard under his hand as she swallowed hard. She felt his cock start throbbing deep inside of her and flew her hand to his face to cover his mouth, muffling his groans. Her entire body was burning, the mixture of pain and pleasure taking over, overfiring her, shuttering her into a million pieces.

“Please,” she panted, looking into his ferocious eyes. “Now, Bobby, please, come with me…”

Her choking words, her feverishly red cheekbones, her completely black eyes, her body arched into a bow, Bobby leaned forward kissing her painfully as he thrust into her again and again, until she cried into his mouth, clenching around him painfully, sending him over the edge, too.

He pushed into her, her walls so tight around him, his eyes prickled with tears from how hard he came, sinking his teeth into the crook of her neck to somehow stifle a cry of his own. His body collapsed on top of her, still caught in the aftershocks, trembling and shuddering under her soft, soothing touch that was leading him gently back down from his high.

Slowly, Bobby managed to prop on his hands.

“Don’t forget to give Totally Succulent five stars on Trip Advisor.”

She looked at him with a smirk on her lips and adoration in her eyes, and for a few moments, he was just basking in her warmth before pulling himself off of her and helping her sit up. He looked down and saw a stream of blood running down her chest.

“Fuck,” Bobby grabbed a paper towel and turned the tap on.

He pushed her dress off her shoulder and pressed the towel to her neck, trying to stop the blood, and met her eyes.

“What?”

Kat just smirked: “Nothing. First aid Bobby.”

“It’s called aftercare.”

The baker rolled his eyes and slowly moved the towel down her chest, whipping the blood away while she reached to zip his jeans. Her eyes slowly returned to their usual emerald-green color when she caught her hand and tossed the towel away before kissing his fingers gently, one by one.

His breath stuttered in his throat when she took hold of his other hand and slowly sucked his fingers into her mouth licking them clean.

“Shit,” he breathed out feeling his dick started hardening again.

“I think you should clock out early today,” the girl whispered, biting her lip. “Sasha will deal.”

He nodded abruptly, helping her knock herself into shape, and left the bathroom to give Sasha heads-up while Kat was calling a cab. She slipped out of the backrooms unnoticed and left the bakery, waiting for Bobby outside. It was cold and windy, and the skin of her naked legs prickled with goosebumps immediately as she stood there, shivering under the gusts of winds.

Her phone buzzed in her hand, and she answered immediately, taking a few steps away from the bakery door.

“Hey,” she had to clear her throat before continuing. “What’s up?”

“Are we still on for the viewing party?” Lucas’ voice sounded strained.

“Yeah,” Kat grazed her bottom lip between her teeth. “You don’t want to watch it together anymore?”

“It’s not that,” the man went quiet for a moment. “They never showed our… kitchen bits,” he chuckled sardonically.

“Yeah, it’s not something you air on national TV,” she agreed. “But Bobby knows either way.”

“I know. I… I don’t want it to become weird between all of us, that is. When I told Henrik and Rahim that we’ve spent the weekend at your and Bobby’s place watching the show, it took them a few to figure what to say. They all think it’s weird… we’re weird.”

She knew exactly what their friends were thinking about them. They felt bad for Bobby and thought he shouldn’t be okay with her spending time with Lucas. They thought she was being egoistical for being friends with her ex. They thought Lucas should’ve stepped aside and stayed away from her because he deserved to be somebody’s one and only. They thought that they knew everything better than the three of them, and Kat was barely able to handle it anymore, these pauses in conversation whenever she mentioned being with Lucas, these pitiful glances at Bobby… She felt like back in the Villa, where everyone was always so protective over Bobby that she felt like a villain.

She knew their friends love them, all three of them, but this constant overprotection of Bobby was slowly winding her up, making her question if any of those people actually _knew_ her if they could think for even a second that she could ever do anything to hurt him.

“They can all go fuck themselves,” she said finally. “They’re not us.”

“I know, kitten,” Lucas sighed. “But they’re not entirely wrong.”

She knew that, too. She knew that when the tables were turned and Bobby suddenly started hanging out with Oksana, she wasn’t even remotely okay with that, even though it was different, and Oksana wasn’t Bobby’s best friend and was trying to get him back… Kat shook her head, and her long, fire-red hair bounced off her shoulders, dancing like tongues of flames in a fire pit.

She knew if it was anyone but Bobby they wouldn’t be okay with her ex-lover being around her constantly, wouldn’t be okay with her driving almost two hours to another city to spend time with another guy twice a month, wouldn’t be okay to trust her enough to encourage that relationship… But it was Bobby, the only person she opened her heart to, the one she was willing to die for, the one she was going to spend her lifetime with – and even if everyone was right, she didn’t care.

“I’m just tired of being a fucking villain of my own story,” Kat said quietly. “The one who’s torturing Bobby, you, everyone, it’s just too exhausting to be the bad guy all the time.”

Her phone beeped next to her ear before Lucas could’ve said anything.

“I gotta go now, my cab is here,” she felt relieved, this conversation was too much to have after a long day. “Just hit us up when you’re ready.”

The door behind her back opened and closed, and Bobby’s arm snaked around her shoulder.

“Sorry, had to sign some papers,” he kissed the side of her head. “You’re freezing.”

“It’s fine,” Kat leaned into his touch. “Our car is here.”

They both climbed into the backseat, and Kat’s lips found Bobby’s the second the car started moving. All the building frustration was in that kiss, and he returned it eagerly, winding his fingers through her hair, inhaling her scent deeply.

“Shit,” Bobby groaned in frustration when his phone rang loudly. “It’s Dean.”

She pulled slightly away, and Bobby hit ‘answer’. “Hey, Dean.”

The baker’s face changed slowly as the other man was talking, and Kat couldn’t exactly tell what kind of emotion she was seeing on her boyfriend’s face.

“He and Louis will be in town for two days,” he covered the speaker and turned to Kat. “Dean’s asking if we’re free to hang out… I guess, he wants me and Louis to make up.”

Bobby rolled his eyes, but there was something in his voice that made Kat’s heart swell in her chest with the need to do anything and everything to make this man happy.

“Tell him they can stay with us.”

The baker’s eyes widened. “You sure?”

“We have plenty of space, and it’s better than staying at a hotel.”

She wasn’t even remotely excited about spending time with a man who hated her, but she knew Bobby was missing his mated even though he never brought it up – and if there was a way to help them make up, she was willing to give it a shot.

Bobby finished the call when they were already in their kitchen, the mood between them changed. Kat kicked off her shoes and went straight to the kitchen, fetching a bottle of tequila out the cabinet.

“Hey,” Bobby looked at her throwing two shots back one after another. “Hey, you okay?”

She was not okay, she was barely holding it together, and putting some more onto her plate wasn’t something that would be easy for her to swallow.

“Yeah, just tired,” she shrugged off her jacket. “When’s their flight?”

“They’ll be in London around eight in the morning,” Bobby frowned a little. “Are you sure it’s okay for them to stay here?”

“They’re your friends,” Kat put the kettle on and turned to Bobby, trying to fight back the sudden mood swing. “You were fine with the girls staying here, and that Lucas stays here when he’s in town – so yeah, it’s fair that you have your mates staying here, too.”

This wasn’t what she was planning to say, her words sounded too dry, too disconnected, too unfair on him, and the redhead remembered she’d skipped her meds today.

“I’m… I’m gonna take a shower.

She pressed a quick kiss to his lips and left Bobby alone in the kitchen, her hands balled into fists so hard, her nails left deep half-moons in her palms.

He watched her back as she disappeared in the corridor and hit his open hand against the counter. Their summer of love was over, and now, they were on their own in this sea of broken emotions and fears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A
> 
> The ‘service me’ dialogue shamelessly stolen from Buffy the Vampire Slayer


	13. Edges.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "...The water's clean and warm and green  
> I'm not allowed to swim  
> I'm scared of getting in..."
> 
> [Deep Green - Marika Hackman]

“Bobby, wake up,” Kat’s soft, gentle voice broke through the morning haze, pulling Bobby out of his dream. “It’s almost nine, your friends will be here any moment now.”

He cracked one eye open to see his girl fully closed, wearing an off-white chunky knit sweater and black pants, she looked more put together than he when he was wearing a suit with a tie. She pulled her knee up as she zipped her boots and then reached her hand to run it through his hair. Her soft touch warmed his heart, and the baker caught her palp into his and brought it to his lips to kiss her fingers gently.

“You’re leaving already?” he shifted in the bed to rest his head in her lap.

“I’m seeing Dr. Wright today since I won’t be able to see him for the next couple of weeks,” she stroked his cheek softly. “I need my prescription renewed.”

The girl frowned a little, not wanting to continue with the topic. After Lucas talked her into telling Bobby about her therapy sessions and that she was back on medicine, she felt as if he was constantly concerned about her and didn’t want to add any more fuel into that dumpster fire that their lives already were.

Kat lowered her face to Bobby’s and kissed him longingly, savoring every second that her lips were pressed to his. His hand snaked up her back and tangled in the hair at the back of her neck, pulling it slightly.

“You’re driving me insane,” the man whispered into her mouth brokenly. “Can you stay for a bit longer?”

“I can, but I’ll make you get up and make me coffee,” Kat pronged his nose with her finger.

“Or,” Bobby’s hand moved under the girl’s sweater. “You could just lay down with me.”

She shook her head, letting a small chuckle escape her lips, but the smile never touched her pensive emerald-green eyes. The baker sighed heavily admitting his defeat and propped himself up to give her a kiss on the forehead.

“Alright, leave me here to perish,” he flew his hand to his chest dramatically. “By the way,” he added as he slowly untangled himself from the silk sheets. “Giorgos asked if you could stop by the gallery before we leave. I think he wants to ask you of a favor.”

Kat rolled her eyes slightly but nodded. “Yeah, I think I know what exactly he’s going to ask.”

She got to her feet, straightened her clothes, and pulled her hair up into a voluminous ponytail, using a strand of hair instead of a hair tie.

“What?” she noticed Bobby’s glance.

“Nothing,” he smiled. “I’ve never seen you using one of those hair ties, I just realized…” his cheeks flushed pink at the realization of how ridiculous he must’ve sounded.

The redhead suddenly smiled, genuinely this time, and her eyes sparkled in the dim morning light.

“It’s because I’m from New York, we don’t do hair ties there.”

Somehow, this silly exchange lifted a part of the burden off her shoulders, and it became easier to breathe. Even back in the Villa, Bobby had this effect on her, whenever he was around, she felt at peace, and he always managed to find the words to ease whatever pain she was feeling. He was her best friend from day one, and now… She shook her head, casting away unwelcomed thoughts.

The redhead watched her boyfriend as she finally rolled out of their bed, standing before the large window, and stretched with his entire body, flexing the muscles of his stomach.

Bobby spotted her gaze lingering on his skin and smirked smugly. After all these years of self-doubt and lack of confidence, for the first time in his life, he actually felt sexy… _desired_. Desired by the only woman he needed, and it was the feeling that sent his heart into a merry jig every time he saw that look in her gorgeous eyes, the one that sent thrills of electricity down his spine and made his cock harden just from that almost palpable glance she gave him.

“You know,” her voice went lower when she noticed his fastened breath. “I could’ve just left you here,” she stepped towards him. “In this room, cuffed to our bed…”

Her finger ran down his naked chest and the muscles of his stomach twitched slightly as she scraped her nail gently against his hot skin. Her hand moved lower, and she moved closer, pushing Bobby against the window. The baker opened his mouth to say something, but Kat pressed her free hand against his mouth.

“Don’t make a sound, got it?”

He nodded hastily, and her fingers moved further down, slipping between his skin and the waistband of his pajama pants. His breath hitched when she took his already hard dick into her hand and stroked slowly, barely bringing any relief and making his body arch into her touch. She leaned closer, and the scent of vanilla and jasmine enveloped him, filling up his nose, lungs, his entire existence.

The sleeve of her seater was rubbing against his abs, making his skin prickle with goosebumps, and Bobby groaned brokenly into Kat’s palm that was still pressed against his lips.

“Is that not making sounds?” she asked dangerously calmly and tightened her grip of his cock, and the man’s head lolled back involuntarily, hitting the hard glass of the window. “You need some practice since now your friends will be here, listening in on us…”

Her voice dropped to a raspy whisper as she kept murmuring into his ear, her breath burning his skin. Her hand moved faster, and the coil in the pit of his stomach started unwinding, bringing him closer to the edge.

She loved pleasing him more than she loved getting pleased herself, and it was the hottest damn thing in the world, the way her eyes darkened, and her body reacted to his pleasure. He learned to spot the slightest changes in the way she moved, in the way her voice trembled and her usually ice-cold body turned blazing hot.

Kat sucked the skin on the crook of his neck into her mouth, and Bobby’s body exploded with a million flashing lights as he came, groaning into her palm. Slowly, she moved her hand out of his pajama bottoms and licked her fingers, one by one, looking into his widened eyes. With her other hand still on his mouth, she leaned into the man to whisper: “See you later… Bobby.”

The way she said his name made him swallow hard. She already moved away from him when he finally shook himself into action and grabbed her by the hand, pulling her back in and kissing deeply on the mouth.

“Don’t make me wait too long,” he whispered before releasing her from his grip.

When she left, he went into the bathroom, shoved the pants into the washing mashing, and stepped into the shower letting the hot streams of water wash away at least some of his worries.

As if meeting Kat’s parent just in a few days wasn’t enough, now, he had to worry about Louis and… Bobby shook his head and turned the taps off. If Louis couldn’t be happy for him, he didn’t want him in his life. After all, it turned out, losing friendships wasn’t that hard. He missed things that he and Johno used to do, and he missed hanging out with him… but never he regretted his decision to part ways with his once best friend.

He was now a different man, a better man for all he knew, and if his friends weren’t happy about that, he had no problem not having such friends. Bobby stared at his reflection trying to figure out if those thoughts were his attempt to calm himself down – or the actual truth.

Waiting for his friends, he got dressed and studied his dreads critically. Kat never said anything about his hair, but it was obvious her parents wouldn’t be fond of his hairstyle. He tried pulling the dreads together, but it reminded him of that guy on Instagram who was constantly talking about yoga and liquid diet.

The ring of his phone made Bobby startled, and he hastily reached for it to tell the concierge to let his guests in. His pulse quickened as the anxiety kicked in, and the baker had to take a few deep breaths to calm down before someone buzzed on the doorbell.

“Holy hell,” Dean barged inside. “This place is posher than any hotel.”

Bobby stared into the empty hall. “Where’s Louis?”

“He went straight to his meeting,” the older man unceremoniously walked down the corridor, looking around. “He’ll meet us later… Thanks for the invitation to the bakery opening, by the way.”

Bobby’s face flushed red.

“Dean, I’m…”

“Relax,” they walked into the kitchen and Bobby started making coffee. “I understand. And I think Lou finally understands it, too. He fucked up, they all did.”

“But not you,” Bobby noted pouring the coffee into small cups. “You always supported my relationship with Kat.”

“Because I can see what they can’t,” Dean shrugged. “They can see someone who swooped in and stole their friend and put him through hell on the national TV. I see someone who ripped that clown mask off your face and pushed you to fight for what you want.”

They both went silent for a long moment sipping on the coffee and enjoying a slow morning. Bobby wanted to ask Dean about Johno but couldn’t bring himself to speak about the man who he used to call his brother. If Johno wanted him in his life he would’ve reached out weeks ago, but he never had. He just left his life and never looked back – so why should Bobby even care.

His phone buzzed angrily, and the baker sighed: somehow, he always knew when it was Sasha calling to yell at him.

“Excuse me,” he grabbed his phone. “Good morning, Sasha. What have I done this time?”

The man on the other end cursed: “You were supposed to be here half an hour ago to make that ridiculous profiteroles cake.”

Bobby mentally kicked himself off the rooftop.

“Fuck,” he groaned. “I’ll be there in ten.”

He ended the call and looked at Louis. “Sorry, I have to go to the bakery, I’m making a birthday cake for a daughter of the niece of a friend of… anyways, you stay here, let me show you the room we’ve prepared for you and Louis.

“Oh, don’t even think that I’m gonna miss out on your pastries,” Dean waved his hand. “I’m going with you and sampling the entire stock.”

The older man frowned as if remembering something. “So, where’s our lovely hostess?”

“I’m instead of her,” Bobby went to the wardrobe to put his shoes and leather jacket on. “She had some stuff to do in the morning, our friend asked for her assistance…” he barely refrained from rolling his eyes at his own words. “C’mon. She’ll join us later.”

They went outside, and the doorman hailed for a cab. When they finally climbed into the backseat of an old black cab, Dean sent Bobby a thoughtful look and asked nonchalantly: “A friend meaning that physiotherapist?”

Bobby clamped a hand over his mouth and shook his head.

“No,” he responded after a pause. “Someone Kat went to university with.”

“I see.”

“Is that a problem, too?” Bobby snapped. “I thought you out of all of them…”

“Relax, Bobby,” Dean threw his hands up. “I know what it’s like when your partner’s friend can’t stand you.”

Bobby’s cheeks flushed pink at the reminder of his own initial resentment towards Dean. Before the baker could’ve said anything, the elder man continued.

“What I’m trying to say, Bobby, I’m on her side because I’ve been on both sides. And I can see that she loves you the way no one else could, and she will never do anything to hurt you… on purpose. But it’s clear as day that she possesses the powers to ruin you completely, and your friends are just worried it might happen.”

“Well, as of right now, _they_ hurt me, not she.”

The cab stopped across the street from the bakery, and both men climbed out of the car and rushed inside hiding from the suddenly started rain. Bobby left Dean with Sasha and walked straight into the kitchen.

“Morning, boss,” the other baker greeted him. “The meringues are almost ready, and I got bored and made some strawberry filled croissants.”

“Thanks, Tom,” Bobby put his apron on. “You’re free for now, I’ll be here until the lunchtime, so you can go.”

When the other man left, Bobby took the dough out of the fridge and reached for the puffs he’s made last morning. He busied himself with baking, trying not to think about what Dean told him just now. He knew there was some kind of truth behind his mate’s words, but it didn’t matter to him. He once told Kat that with her, all the pain, all the bad things that happened to him in the twenty-four years of his life was worth it because it brought him to her.

And if she was destined to be the one who ruins him – then, it’ll be worth it, too. Because before then, she made him the happiest man ever lived.

He went into some kind of trance, building a tower of cream-filled puffs until the phone buzzed in the back pocket of his jeans. His eyes fell on the wall clock: it’s been almost three hours since he started, and he never noticed.

The baker pulled the phone out of the pocket and placed it upright on the table.

“Hey,” Lucas' face appeared on the screen. “I was just…” the man stopped himself staring at the monstrous creation sitting right before him. “What on earth is that?”

“Croquembouche,” Bobby placed the last little profiterole on top of the tower and reached for the caramel sauce that was now the perfect temperature.

The physio shook his head. “Anyways, I just wanted to say that I can’t join the viewing party tonight, Henrik’s in town and I’m taking him out.”

“You don’t sound much excited,” Bobby noticed searching for the bag of edible glitter.

“Because I’m taking him out, literally,” Lucas winced. “We’re going to ‘explore’ Sydlings Copse,” he air-quoted with an irritable huff.

“My friends are visiting tonight,” the baker put the glitter bag down and pressed his elbows against the counter. “It was the last-minute notice, and I… well, Kat said they could stay with us.”

“Of course, she did.”

Lucas’ tone of voice changed ever so slightly, no one else would’ve noticed this sudden warmth spilling through the usual calm, almost indifferent sound. No one but Bobby. Not because the older man was his rival like all of his friends thought – but because his own voice changed whenever the Scot was talking about the redhead. Because he knew the feeling that filled his chest whenever he thought of her, and it was the same feeling that was now pouring out the physio’s words.

Even Lottie who was good mates with Lucas herself couldn’t understand their friendship, and sometimes, Bobby couldn’t understand it either… He had to stop the flux of thoughts streaming through his head and focus on the conversation and the cake.

“Lottie wants to organize a surprise party for Kat’s birthday,” Lucas said after a long pause. “She thinks she’ll need some cheering after the weekend from hell at her parents’ anniversary.”

“Yeah,” Bobby nodded. “I think she and Priya came up with this idea of an early reunion.”

“Hope and Marisol uninvited though,” the physio arched his brows, and Bobby chuckled.

“Lottie tried talking about this to me, but my brain can’t take any more. I feel like I’m gonna go mad even before the weekend.”

“Your flight is this Friday, right?”

“Yeah, I think, around eight in the evening.”

Lucas nodded going quiet as he watched Bobby decorating the cake, cursing from time to time as the caramel refused to set.

“Damn it,” the baker threw away a ruined puff.

“I think I’m gonna just leave you with this Croquem-bullshit. I’ll let you know when Lottie decided on the surprise reunion date and location.”

“Hold on! How am I…great, he hanged up already.”

Bobby finished decorating the cake and stared at his creation for a moment, his thoughts somewhere far away from the kitchen of his bakery. Lucas was the only person he was honest with when talking about the upcoming trip. Everyone knew that Kat’s parents weren’t fond of him and if he admitted his constant anxiety to Gary or Rahim, they wouldn’t stop worrying about him, and wouldn’t stop talking about it.

The physio knew when exactly to say something encouraging and when to shut the conversation down, just like now, for the sake of Bobby’s frayed nerves.

“Hey,” Louis’ voice made the baker jump. “Sorry, A didnae mean tae startle ye.”

Bobby just waved his hand and carefully moved the cake closer to the center of the counter, waiting for it to set so he could pack it into the box and send it to the birthday girl with a note that Sasha promised to write.

“S’ok,” Bobby took his apron off. “Let’s go back into the café and have some coffee.”

“A wantit tae talk tae ye before we join the others.”

“The others?”

“Yer manager an his girlfriend.”

“Oh, Lottie’s here, too?” the baker sighed: the blonde witch was fiercely loyal, and if Louis said anything about Kat in her presence, Totally Succulent would’ve ended up in flames.

“Aye,” Louis winced. “She’s not mah fan, apparently.

“Well, I am neither,” Bobby couldn’t help the bitterness in his voice. The last time he saw his friend was to months ago, and they haven’t spoken ever since then.

“Thon's whit A wantit tae talk aboot. A wantit tae apologize for the way A actit last time. Dean telt me it wis her idea for us tae stay at yer place?”

Bobby pushed himself up and sat on the countertop. “Yep.”

Louis nodded, pacing back and forth.

“Thon wis nice o her. Bobby, A know ye think thon we've aw juist gangit up on ye but it's no true. We juist dinnae want tae see yer heart broken, thon is. A know ye love her an she loves ye but this thin between ye isnae healthy. An this friendship wi her ex, canae ye see it's no normal?”

The baker listened to his once friend and couldn’t believe his ears. How stupid he was for thinking that Louis came here to make things right, to apologize for being an asshole. How stupid he was all these years, supporting his friends and their decisions, biting his tongue when he wanted to butt in.

“Let me get this straight,” Bobby said slowly, calmly. “You just came here to dump this shit on me? And you think that what being a good friend is?”

The older man stopped pacing and walked up to him, a deep line between his brows. “Have ye watchit the show back? aw o't.”

“Not the entire thing but yes. What does it matter?”

“Have ye seen yourself? an have ye seen her wi the others? wi thon physiotherapist guy? gin it wis yer friend i yer place, hou'd ye feel?"

Bobby just shook his head.

“I wouldn’t attack my friend’s girlfriend before even getting to know her.”

“Sae ye dinnae care hou she treats her so-callit friend?”

A pang of anger went through Bobby’s heart. He was tired of that conversation, tired of people who assumed they knew better what was good for him than he himself – all the same people who watched him year after year failing at everything that he touched. They watched him fucking up his relationships, watched him waste his life at the hospital kitchen because he was too scared to follow his dream – and somehow, his averagely miserable life never bothered them.

Those few weeks back at the Villa were the best thing that ever happened to him, even though he spent most of the time almost agonizing. But that taught him who he really was and what he wanted. It taught him to keep fighting no matter what, and he won.

“You’re forgetting something,” Bobby said finally. “I know exactly how she is with her friends. _I_ was her friend at first if you’re forgetting.”

“An ye dinnae care?”

“She treats all her friends like that,” Bobby responded, looking Louis in the eyes.

“And she knows where the line lies. I trust her, Louis. I let my girlfriend spend nights at the other man’s house in another town because I _know_ that she’d rather let a train run over her body than do anything to hurt me. Could you say the same about your husband?”

He knew it was a low blow, but his patience was gone. He was willing to never speak to these people ever again if it comes to that. He missed his past with Johno, but his life wasn’t any less without him. If it didn’t have Kat, he would’ve felt the loss but with her, nothing else mattered. She was the world for him, she filled the space around him with infinite love and happiness and certainty that life has so much more in store for him.

She made him believe that when one door closes, three more open. His friendship with Johno ended but he found Giorgos who turned out completely different from what he thought of him when they just met.

In London, he found his new home, the one he’s been dreaming of his whole life – not a place, this feeling inside of his chest that he belonged there. The feeling he never felt before he met his Red.

“Na,” Louis said finally. “A canae.”

“I’m tired of repeating this conversation,” Bobby shrugged. “Honestly, at this point, I don’t care what you lot think about any of this. I’ll tell you even more: if not for Kat, I wouldn’t be talking to you now. She was the one who invited you to stay at our place, and the one who convinced me to try and fix this friendship. And you treat her like a fucking villain.”

His once friend looked at him in disbelief, thinking over the baker’s words.

“A'm sorry,” he frowned. “A want tae try an fix it, Bobby. A know ye stoppit talkin tae everyone, an we ourselves are tae blame for thon. An... A know ye didnae approve o Dean for a long time but niver made me feel the way A evidently made ye feel. Let's have dinner, the four o us.”

Bobby frowned a little. His friends hated Kat, and even though she was nice to them she hated them back – not even for being assholes towards her, but for the way they made Bobby feel. The past two months were so rough on her, and he hated the mere thought of dragging her into any more drama… _and there will be drama_.

“Okay,” he agreed finally, and his insides flipped upside down. “Let’s do it.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A


	14. Where is the real me?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "...I was confused by the powers that be  
> Forgetting names and faces  
> Passersby were looking at me  
> As if they could erase it..."
> 
> [Placebo - Meds]

“Damn,” Louis looked around the lobby on the first floor as he, Bobby, and Dean made their way back home to get changed for the dinner. “This place is ridiculously posh.”

“So cool, right?” his husband grabbed the man’s hand excitedly. “I wanna see the rooftop, Bobs.”

“We can go up there after the dinner,” Bobby frowned just a bit when the concierge approached them. “Hello, Alfred.”

“Mr. McKenzie,” the old man nodded. “The courier delivered this for Miss Rhodes while you were away,” he passed Bobby a large rectangular box.

“Thank you,” the baker took the box and hurried to walk his friends to the elevators, feeling his face burn under Louis’ judging gaze.

He knew what exactly his friend was thinking, he could read it in the way his jaw set, and his eyes became colder, and he hated it. Why couldn’t they just be happy for him? Why couldn’t they see that he was finally where he belonged and just accept it? What was so wrong with him being successful and loved?

He zoned out of Dean’s chirping, thinking about the approaching disaster that their dinner was going to be – that, he did not doubt. When Louis told his husband that they’re having a double date, the other man immediately invited Lottie and Sasha to join, and Bobby could only imagine Lottie’s reaction when Louis inevitably crosses the line and says something that will make the witch go off on him.

 _All we need now to make it a complete flop is Lucas,_ Bobby chuckled darkly to himself opening the door and letting his friend in first. His phone rang, and the Scot rushed to show his friends their room.

“I have to take this, but you guys feel at home.”

He put the box down on the hallway table and accepted the call, walking into the closet. “Hey.”

“Hi, Bobby,” Sasha’s voice sounded excited as ever. “Guess, what?”

“What?”

“Olive Magazine chose your Cupcakes of the Thirsty Dead and Fang-tastic Tarts for their Baking Pick of the Day.”

Bobby couldn’t hold back a smile: that website was the most popular culinary website in the country, being featured on its frontpage equaled dozens of new clients and orders.

“Have you thought about my proposal?” Sasha asked, and the baker frowned again.

“I don’t have enough time and hands to start taking orders online.”

“That, I’ve heard already,” Bobby could almost hear his manager rolling his eyes. “And I told you that you should hire more people to work in the kitchen. Tom is a great guy but the two of you can barely keep up with all the orders now, and if you want your bakery to grow…”

“And I told you it’s not what I want,” the baker sighed heavily.

“And _I_ told you it’s ridiculous,” Sasha cut him off. “This is London, not whatever weird little town you used to live in.”

“Glasgow isn’t weird,” Bobby retorted. “Sometimes, you’re such a… Russian.”

Sasha chuckled, and his voice softened a little as he spoke.

“I’ll take that as a compliment. We both know that I’m the only one who isn’t tiptoeing around you, and we both know this is one of the reasons you hired me. Because you want someone to tell you everything as it is, no sugarcoating and bullshit niceness.”

Bobby couldn’t argue with that. Everyone treated him like a porcelain vase, as if just one awkward movement was enough to shatter him into pieces, and it was… exhausting. His friends from the show were overly supportive – and his friends from before seemed not to be able to accept his new life at all, thinking it will somehow break him.

He huffed something into the phone, but Sasha just continued, unimpressed.

“So now, I’m telling you: when you and your missus get back, we’re continuing this conversation. I suggest you think about my words. Having a cute bakery is nice and all, but you should be using every opportunity to grow and expand. I’m not suggesting opening a second bakery right away but making online orders at least partially available is a good starting point. Laters, Bobby.”

Sasha ended the call before Bobby had a chance to say anything in response, and the baker threw the phone angrily onto one of the drawers. He could hear Louis and Dean’s muffled voices arguing over something but had no energy to think about it.

He went to the bathroom, almost ripping the clothes off as soon as the door closed behind him. He missed his old friends, missed the memories they shared – but a part of him was ready to let go and let the memories stay in the past, let those friendships stay in the past. He was fighting for something that used to be so important to him, but it seemed that he was the only one willing to do something to keep what there used to be.

Bobby stood under the streams of hot running water trying to calm down. Back in the Villa, he used to dream about this moment: he and Kat together, hanging out with his friends. Now, his dream came true in a form of a nightmare that he couldn’t wake up from. He always hated confrontations, his childhood disappointments kept following him wherever he went, but he learned the hard way that he couldn’t make everyone happy, no matter how much he wanted to.

And so, he chose to make _her_ happy, he chose to _choose_ her, every time, over anyone – everyone.

Bobby turned the taps off and stooped out of the shower, wrapping a towel around his hips. With each passing day, he loved her even more, and he didn’t know how it was even possible. Sometimes, he wondered if there was a limit to his love – and there wasn’t one. He loved her to infinity and once more, forever, always, in this life and after he dies.

He loved her fiery, to the point there wasn’t a single cell in his body that wasn’t filled with her. He was drowning in this love; he’s drowned in _her_.

Once, it scared him but not anymore. Whatever she took, she gave him a hundred times more. She was his sun and moon, the whole galaxy that belonged to him, and him only, and every word he said to Louis, he meant it. From the moment she said she loved him, he was safe from any doubts, worries, and fears. Her love was his safe place, his protection against the entire world.

His phone was buzzing when Bobby entered the closet, and his heart picked the tempo when he saw the redhead’s face on the screen.

“Hey,” she smiled softly. “I got stuck at the clinic, but I’m on my way,” she flipped the camera to show Bobby the insides of her cab. “Lottie asked me to pick her up, she wanted to tell me something _in private.”_

“So mysterious,” the baker rolled his eyes. “We’ll just wait for you guys at the bar then,” Bobby frowned a little.

“What is it?”

“Nothing… Sasha,” he admitted finally. “He wants me to hire more people and start taking more orders.”

“Why it’s not a good thing?” Kat asked, leaning her head against the back of the car seat, and her hair caught a ray of setting sun.

Bobby sighed and put the phone onto the drawer and went to grab a pair of pants and a white button-up shirt. He never thought this through when he decided to open the bakery because he could never imagine such a success that it became. He imagined himself having a small bakery in Shawlands where he’d be spending his days making pastries and having long conversations with the regulars.

Totally Succulent was everything but, and Bobby was both excited and confused, and maybe, he was hesitant about hiring more staff because it was all happening too fast, not giving him time to adjust to his new life?

“It’s not a _not good_ thing,” he said finally, pulling on his pants. “It’s just a little…”

“Overwhelming?” she finished his sentence for him. “I know. And I’ll support whatever decision you’ll make.”

“I know,” Bobby stopped before the phone and said quietly. “I missed you today.”

“I’ve missed you, too,” she whispered. “I can’t wait for when we go to New York, I’ll take you to all of my favorite places. Autumn is beautiful there.”

“Oh, are you taking me on a horse carriage ride?” Bobby grinned widely.

“Just so you know, it’s not as romantic as it seems,” the girl smirked. “But yeah, we’ll take a ride through the Central Park and then have lunch at the boathouse…”

“Boathouse?”

“You’ll see,” she ran her fingers through her curls, watching Bobby as he started buttoning his shirt. “I’m at Lottie’s, see you soon.”

She ended the call, and Bobby grabbed his phone and went to the guest room to see if his friends were ready, bumping into Dean in the hallway.

“Shit,” the baker exhaled. “You nearly gave me a heart attack. You guys ready?”

They left the building and strolled down the street, heading towards one of the bar&kitchen places about ten minutes away. A gust of cold wind threw a bunch of fallen leaves into Bobby’s face and he almost lost his footing.

“Careful,” Louis grabbed his shoulder.

Bobby frowned to himself: his mates were used to his clumsiness but in the past few months it seemed that this wasn’t an issue anymore… until now.

They walked into the bar, took off their coats and jackets, and headed towards the bar to wait for everyone else.

“Sae, A guess we're first,” Louis said waving the bartender over.

The awkwardness between them seemed palpable, but Bobby couldn’t get bothered to try and fix it. Usually, people expected him to diffuse the tension, come up with silly jokes, and be the one to turn to whenever the mood was shit. But he wasn’t that guy anymore.

Now he knew that he was allowed not to hide his emotions under the joker mask, allowed to feel whatever he felt, and not pretend to be okay when he wasn’t. _She_ taught him that.

Kat taught him to open up and be vulnerable – and to be strong and fight for himself. And for the first time, Bobby didn’t feel the need to break the uncomfortable silence between him and his once friends. _Once friends,_ he repeated internally. It seemed like the end of the era, to say goodbye to people he’d known for many years, but he was ready to do it.

If they manage to fix it, he’ll be happy – but if they won’t, he’ll move on without any regrets.

“Y’all look even less entertaining than my nanna’s book club,” Sasha appeared from behind Bobby’s back. “Where are our lovely ladies?”

The baker rolled his eyes: “They’re fashionably late.”

“Well, I’m starving,” the Russian man looked around. “Eating pastries all day every day is fine and games until you realize you can’t squeeze into your pants anymore.”

Sasha managed to break the tension, and all four men spent the next fifteen minutes joking around and discussing Bobby’s ridiculous Halloween pastry names until something made his heart speed suddenly. As if compelled, he glanced at the bar entrance just in time to see the door open, letting Kat and Lottie inside. The blonde held the door for her friend, and Bobby’s breath got caught in his throat.

No matter how many times he saw her, somehow, every time she became even more beautiful. Her fire-red curls cascaded down her shoulders, and the deep-purple silk of her dress hugged her curves and flowed down her body in airy waves. She wasn’t even trying but her mere presence made everyone’s eye follow her movements as the girl walked towards Bobby, seeing only him, and wrapped her arms around his neck.

The world around disappeared as he pulled her body closer and buried his face in her neck, inhaling the sweet scent of jasmine and vanilla. Not being around her for just half a day was unbearable, it made him feel like half of him was missing, and now he was finally complete again.

“Get a room, you two,” Sasha chuckled, pressing a kiss to Lottie’s cheek. “Okay, if I don’t eat something now, I’ll chew on Bobby’s arm.”

They moved to sit at the large wooden table in the corner, each couple across the table from each other, and Lottie motioned to Kat to order something for her. Bobby’s insides tightened into a knot when he spotted a determined look on the blonde’s face as she glanced at Louis who sat next to Sasha on the other side of the table.

“So,” she began, breaking the silence. “Louis. We didn’t have time to talk when you guys were at the bakery. What’s your deal?”

The witch waited until the waitress took everyone’s orders, her eyes glued to the man, and hurried his answer.

“Well?”

Kat glanced at Bobby, her body heaving with a bad feeling. He just shrugged as if saying that they couldn’t do much now that Lottie was on a prowl: it was easier to stop an approaching train with bare hands than to change the Lottie’s mind when she was determined to interrogate someone.

Louis winced a little. “A work at the hospital in Glasgow.”

“So, you’re a doctor?”

“Lab tech,” he clarified.

“Is that how you and Bobby met?” Sasha wondered, pouring himself some water.

Kat tuned out of the conversation, her thoughts too scattered to keep up with Lottie’s passive-aggressive questions and Louis’ annoyed answers. Just now, the blonde girl admitted that she was falling for the sarcastic Russian and that he invited her to a family dinner. For them, it seemed so _easy_ , so simple and natural, and the redhead couldn’t stop wondering why everything was so difficult for her and Bobby, why they had to keep fighting against the entire world to be together. 

Her family, his friends, the press, and people on social media, everyone seemed to be trying to pull them apart, and she started thinking if they were just cursed. Maybe they were meant to suffer for eternity? Every time it seemed everything was finally right, something new and horrible happened, turning their lives into a horror movie.

“Oh, look at that,” Louis' voice snapped the girl out of her trance, and she looked up and followed his gaze.

On the tv-screen above the bar counter, she saw her own face, smiling at someone. A moment later, Gary’s strong arms wrapped around her waist as the man lifted her up and span around. On-screen Kat was laughing happily, and Kat couldn’t help but smile, too. How long ago it was, she could barely remember the first two weeks when she was with Gary, thinking that she could actually have a go of things with him – even though she knew that he wasn’t enough.

Suddenly, the scene cut to Bobby who was standing in the kitchen alone, and for a moment, his face turned into a painful mask before he managed to put the usual goofy smile back on. Just these few seconds broke Kat’s heart again. They watched this episode already, and in comparison with what a mess of a person her poor baker was during Casa, it was nothing – but it still stung the redhead’s heart painfully.

“This is exactly whit we're aw talkin aboot,” Louis broke the sudden silence. “This wis yer permanent face for six weeks while she wis jumpin from ane guy tae another, kissing awthing wi a pulse. An then she suddenly decides she loves ye - an whit? An it's suddenly fine thon she's aw sweet an lovely wi her ex? Awthing is forgotten cause she loves ye?”

Louis looked angrily from Kat to Bobby, leaning against the table and almost knocking off his plate. He fixed the baker with a stare and continued; his accent stronger than ever. His angry loud voice was attracting the attention of the staff and other patrons, but the man didn’t care, determined to make his voice heard.

“An ye somehow expect yer friends tae be fine wi thon because, quote on quote, she makes ye happy? have ye seen yourself? Ye look nothin like yourself, yer clothes, the way ye talk, hou ye niver make jokes anymore. It's no ye anymore.”

The man pushed his chair back angrily and got to his feet. “A knew stayin wi ye wis a mistake, e'en seein ye wis a mistake. Ye think we're aw juist assholes, richt? Whatever, Bobby, live yer new posh life, hang oot wi yer new crowd an let yer precious girlfriend dictate awthing ye dae. A don’t care.”

He stormed off, leaving everyone in shocked silence. Dean cleared his throat but there were no words he could say to undo what his husband had done. Lottie was gaping air with open mouth, her pale face now red with anger, and Sasha walked around the table and squatted next to her chair, whispering something to his girl.

Dean’s phone beeped.

“He texted he’s going to a hotel,” the man read out loud. “I’m so sorry, guys, if only…”

Kat got to her feet decisively and with a wave of her hand stopped Dean from saying whatever else he was about to mumble.

“Don’t. Did he say where he’s headed?”

“Phoenix Hotel.”

Without a word, she left, squeezing Bobby’s shoulder on the way out. The blood was boiling in her veins as she crossed the road, almost ending up under the car wheels. The hotel was just across the park, and if she understood anything, Louis was going to take a walk to clear his head. She hailed for a cab, and a moment later one of the black cars pulled over.

Kat closed her eyes, trying to calm down, but it didn’t work. The man’s words got stuck in her head, heavy and grim, and she couldn’t get rid of them, repeating them over in over as the car drove her past the red and yellow trees moving slowly in the evening traffic.

When the cab finally took her to Bayswater and stopped before the hotel entrance, climbed out of it, shivering under the cold wind that immediately crawled under the thin fabric of her dress and made her skin prickle with goosebumps. Kat crossed her arms over her chest and leaned against one of the columns that were holding a small awning above the stairs.

Her ears were filled with noise and her head dizzy from the blood rushing through it, and she felt as if she was ready to pass out. Her body was trembling with cold and anger that was running through her with adrenaline, ready to take over any consciousness that she had left.

“The fuck ye’re doin here?” Louis’ noticed her as he climbed up the stairs. “Dean,” he growled. “Listen, A don’t care…”

“No,” Kat took a menacing step forward. “You listen. You and your loser friends can say whatever shit you want about me, I don’t give a damn,” she sized him with a look full of disgust.

“You jealous failures, you’re not upset that he’s with me, you just can’t deal with that fact that he isn’t with you anymore. You can’t stand the thought that he’s successful and don’t need your approval, that his life is better without a bunch of jack wagons that you are. And you know it. You know how _measly_ you all are, and you hate it. You hate that he’s not one of you, and never been. You’ve been dragging him down all this time, and never deserved him.”

The words poured out of her hastily, as if she was scared that she wouldn’t have time to say everything. The man before her hurt Bobby, and once, she made a promise that if someone ever brings him pain, she’ll destroy that person.

“Listen ye, hoor,” he grabbed her shoulders, but the girl wriggled out of his grasp and pushed him back.

“If you ever come anywhere near him, I’ll destroy you,” she hissed. “If you or one of your loser friends try to hurt him, I’ll turn your lives into hell, that’s a promise.”

Her legs were shaking as she walked away, barely registering the empty street around her. She kept walking not seeing where she was going, the lights and buildings blending into a colorful whirlwind. Her head was filled with cottonwool, her vision blurred. She wasn’t cold anymore, she felt nothing at all as if her body went numb.

She needed to get out of there, that was the only coherent thought in her breaking mind. Kat stepped off the pavement and raised her hand to hail a cab when a loud car honk deafened her, and she stepped back, barely holding her balance as the car drove past her. Her heart was pounding out of her chest when she collapsed onto the stairs of one of the now-closed boutiques.

She managed to pull the phone out of the small crossbody bag, unable to make out the names in the contacts, and pressed the last number.

“Kat,” Lucas' voice sounded as if coming through a body of water as he answered the video call almost immediately. “Kat, what’s going on?”

The man saw her drained of color face and trembling lips that already turned blue. “Kat, can you hear me?! Where are you?!”

She tried to answer, but her mouth wouldn’t move, and she just stared at her phone until her eyes fell shut and his full of panic face disappeared completely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A


	15. Hymn for the missing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "...I was gripped with a bit of fear  
> Worried the one thing that I loved  
> Back when I was just a kid  
> Might now never be enough..."
> 
> [Someone Purer -Mystery Jets]

Her entire body hurt as if she got hit by a snowplow. Kat stirred under the sheets, asserting damages. Her arms and legs felt heavy as if made of iron, and her head was splitting in half with a migraine. Slowly, she lifted her eyelids.

The corners of the room were drowning in darkness, only city lights and a small lamp on one of the nightstands lit up the bedroom. She sat up on the bed, wincing in pain, and her gaze fell on the armchair moved close to the bed. Lucas was sleeping in it; an open book fell out of his hands and was now lying on his thighs.

The redhead reached to grab a throw blanket from the feet of the bed and almost groaned with pain. She carefully covered the man and slowly climbed out of the bed, her head still dizzy. She left the room silently and moved towards the sound of quiet voices. Bobby and Lottie were sitting at the kitchen counter, their heads almost touching as they spoke.

“Hey,” she called for them, and they both almost jumped.

“Kat!” Lottie pushed herself forward, wrapping her arms around her friend.

The redhead winced and caught the stare of Bobby’s red eyes. Lottie let go of her, and he stepped closer, reaching to touch the girl as if to make sure she was real. His face bore an imprint of pain, and her first thought was that he was still upset about what Louis said. She grabbed his hand and pulled the man closer, pressing herself into his chest ignoring the pain in her entire body.

“What is it?” she asked softly, her fingers tracing the contours of his face. “You still upset about that idiot?”

Bobby stared at her for a moment and then exchanged worried looks with Lottie.

“Kat, babe, you don’t remember what happened after you left the bar?”

She frowned, trying to recover the last memory her mind held. There was Louis talking shit to Bobby, and then, there was anger that took over her body making the blood boil in her veins and her head spin. There was so much anger, it blurred her vision and made her see red.

Kat slowly shook her head.

“I think I don’t,” she grazed her bottom lip between her teeth. “What happened?”

“Dean told you where Louis has gone off to, and you left,” Bobby answered quietly, his hands clenched on her sides. “And about half an hour later, Lucas called me in panic, said that you passed out on the phone with him and…”

Bobby’s voice trembled and he had to bit on the inner side of his cheek to calm down. For those twenty minutes that took them to get to her, he just died. From the second Lucas yelled into the phone that Kat just lost consciousness to the moment Bobby saw the girl lying motionlessly, his heart wasn’t beating, he was sure of that. He couldn’t even tell how he managed not to collapse right there, next to her body, the moment he saw it lying on the cold concrete of the stairs.

She could feel his tension, fear was rushing through Bobby even now when he had her in his arms. Kat caught his face between her palms and looked in his widened amber eyes.

“I’m here now,” she said firmly. “Everything’s fine. I’m fine.”

“Here,” Lottie interrupted them. “Both of you, sit down and drink this.”

She put two mugs onto the counter, and both her friends obeyed. With Bobby’s arm around her waist, Kat climbed the chair and pulled the mug closer, almost sneezing the moment the smell hit her nose.

“What’s this?”

“Less talk, more drinking,” the blonde dismissed the question. “Where’s Lucas? He needs some too.”

“He’s asleep,” Kat took a sip trying not to swallow little sticks floating on top of the drink. “Why is he here? And… how long have I been knocked out?”

Her friends exchanged glances once more, and Lottie sighed heavily: Bobby was unable to rehash the events of last evening. She busied herself making her remedy for Lucas and started speaking, trying to make her voice sound less concerned.

“You left after that asshole, and me, Bobby and Dean went back here. Dean grabbed their shit and left, and I was on the phone with Sasha…” the blonde cut herself short. “That doesn’t matter. Anyways, Bobby’s phone rang, and I heard Lucas yelling something about you and went to check what the hell was going on.”

Lottie finished mixing some herbs that she brought from her place and put the kettle on. Only now she realized how terrified she was this entire time. With Bobby who was barely able to think straight and Lucas who kept ordering around and seemed to be on a verge of a tantrum, she had to stay collected and rational, making sure both men weren’t going to drive each other and themselves insane before their Snow White wakes up.

She had to stay strong and now that Kat was finally awake, her strengths seemed to just leave her body. She gathered her thoughts and pressed her elbows against the counter.

“Thankfully, you and Bobby, being all cute, have this find-my-phone thing on, so we knew where exactly you were. The bloody lights on that street are crap, even if people were passing by, they probably never noticed you. We barely found you even knowing your location…”

She stopped to pour the boiling water into the mug and saw Kat’s hand reaching to squeeze Bobby’s shoulder. Even now, after everything, she was taking care of him… Lottie felt a pang of guilt in her heart. As all of their friends, she sometimes was too protective of Bobby, and when it came to Kat…

They loved her to death, all of them, but watching Bobby pining over her for over five weeks, watching him getting drunk and sad, and breaking his own heart time after time… It made them all think of Kat as of someone who’s holding the power to break him. And now, Lottie hated herself for being one of those people who sometimes saw her as this villain, even if it was unconscious.

This girl almost froze to death trying to protect Bobby, how could they even think for a second that she might ever hurt him?

Lottie’s eyes welled up with burning tears, and she hurried to turn away from her friends as if to check what was good in the cupboards. She grabbed some random box and swept the tears off her face before continuing.

“Anyway, we found you and brought you back home. Bobby called Giorgos and he asked his physician friend to check on you. He got here really fast, and he said that it was over-fatigue mixed with hypothermia and high emotions. He said you needed rest and sleep, and he gave you a shot of sedative… Well, that’s kind of it.”

She finished the story awkwardly and grabbed the mug. “I’m gonna bring this to Lucas.”

When she left, Kat shifted in her seat to face Bobby.

“I’m so sorry,” she whispered brokenly. “I’m so fucking sorry for putting you through this.”

Bobby’s heart shattered as he grabbed her shoulder and pulled her closer, kissing her with so much desperation it was pouring into the kiss, flooding them both over. She went through hell for him and was now apologizing as if she’d done anything bad. Is that how she feels all the time when their friends always worry about his feelings whenever anyone mentions Lucas? Does she always feel like she’s this villain in the eyes of everyone else? _Does she feel like a villain herself?_

His hands moved up and down her back, and her body finally started relaxing under his touch. Bobby’s lips moved to trail soft kisses down her neck, and she tossed her head back. A thrill of pain went through her neck and spine almost making her see stars.

“What is it?” Bobby looked at her worriedly as the girl jerked, grabbing on the marble countertop.

“I-I’m fine, just…” she had to take a few breaths as the pain spread to her legs and arms. “I feel like I strained some muscles.”

“Both the doctor and Lucas said you’ll most likely have backpains for a few days,” Bobby thought of something. “Now that you’re awake, Lucas should take a look at your back.”

“It’s not that bad,” she objected. “I’ll be fine. I feel strangely well-rested.”

“That’s because you’ve slept the whole day,” Lucas’ voice sounded tired but relieved.

He took a step closer, and Bobby tactfully slid off the barstool to give them some space. He’s never seen the physio so close to a breakdown as in the past twenty hours. When Lucas stormed into their flat, his blown pupils took the entire space, turning his eyes into two black voids.

While Bobby himself seemed to be in some kind of torpor, the older man couldn’t stop fidgeting, his movements abrupt and chaotic and full of panic. He only managed to take control over his emotions when Lottie explained for the third time that the doctor said Kat was going to be fine after she gets some rest. And now, he stood there before her, his eyes full of unsaid words and repressed feelings.

What if he lost her? What if there was no reception in those woods? What if he didn’t get that call? All those thoughts kept swirling in his head, driving the man crazy. She sat before him now, alive, and somewhat okay, but he couldn’t stop thinking about all that _what-ifs_.

“Excuse me,” she slid off the chair and went slowly towards the bathroom.

She hated seeing her friends like that, scared and worried for her. The redhead closed the bathroom door behind herself and leaned against it, closing her eyes, and waiting until the dizziness goes away. She tried to remember last night, but everything was too blurry. She seemed to remember the overwhelming anger – but that was it. As if her mind just scratched those memories.

She wished there was a way to fix everything that happened, for all of them. To make Bobby forget about what his friend said, to wipe the worry off Lottie’s face, to bring the warm chocolate color back into Lucas' haunted eyes. It was all her fault, the dark circles under their eyes and their faces drained out of color, it was all because of her, and she hated herself for being such a mess.

She thought she was doing fine, Dr. Wright was helping her so much… but not enough, as it turned out. She should’ve tried harder… and she will. She rubbed her body with a hard shower brush, leaving red trails everywhere it touched her skin, trying to scrub off the feeling of being a failure, someone who only brought pain to those around her.

If only there was a way for her to be someone else, someone better, someone not so fucked up…

She stood under the hot streams of water that was pouring into her eyes, mixing with tears and running down the drain. Was she always like that? Was she like that when she was a child? Was she always so miserable and broken? Was _this_ the real her? Not the girl Bobby fell in love on their first day in the Villa, the one with a soft smile that sparkled in her eyes – but this dark, stormy cloud of a person that was ready to burst with a thunder?

What if scratching her skin wasn’t enough to remove all this dirt?

She wrapped a towel around herself and used another to dry her hair and went into the wardrobe to grab a pajama. For a moment, she froze before the mirror, studying her reflection. She was still beautiful, but it seemed that there was nothing else left behind the lovely façade, as if her face was one of those castle walls – you see it and your heart fills with excitement only to understand that there’s nothing inside, that besides the wall, there’s only emptiness.

How could anyone love this empty room that she was?

She got changed into satin pajama pants and a long-sleeved nightshirt and joined her friends in the living room.

“How do you feel?” Lottie asked the moment Kat walked into the room.

“Better,” she lied with a soft smile on her lips.

“How’s your back?” Lucas’ eyes burned into her, and she knew he’ll know if she lies.

“Could be worse, I suppose,” she shrugged. “The hot water helped a little.”

“Don’t even listen to her,” Bobby rolled his eyes. “Ironically, being a future doctor, she rather suffers than accepts help.

“Hey!” the redhead protested but Lucas was already walking towards her.

They went back into the dimly lit bedroom, and Kat climbed onto the bed under his judging stare that she felt on her back. “Why are you so opposed to asking for help?”

His quiet, tired voice made her heart sink.

“Because I’ve already done enough to make you all worry about me,” she responded, unbuttoning the nightshirt. “If I can do anything to spare you from more, I’ll do it.”

She let the satin fabric slip down her arms and back and tossed it aside before lying down onto her stomach.

Lucas was the only one she could say those words to. She wanted to protect him – but she also knew that he could handle the truth, that he didn’t _need_ the protection, even though her heart broke every time she saw his once smoldering eyes, now dull and full of unexpressed feelings. She heard him moving across the room, and a moment later the mattress sunk slightly under his weight.

“Does anything else besides your back hurt? Neck?”

“Yes.”

“Legs? Arms?”

“Yes.”

“Yes, what?”

“Yes, everything. My everything hurts.”

Lucas moved to sit on her thighs and pushed the girl’s hair up, baring her neck. “Were you trying to scratch your skin off?” he asked, placing his thumbs onto the pressure points at the base of her head.

“Something like that,” she mumbled into the sheets.

They both went quiet, Lucas’ hands moving up and down her body, melting out the tension and pain. Slowly, he switched to her arms, kneading out the past twenty hours out of her body. Finally, the pain subsided, and she could think clearly. The comfort his touch was giving her, his steady breathing, the way her body filled with warmth – it reminded her of the days back in the Villa, when they were each other’s guiding lights, leading one another through the storm.

Most of the time in the Villa was just a blurred whirlwind for her now. Now, watching herself on tv, Kat wasn’t even sure who that girl was, and it was driving her crazy.

“Do you think…” she cleared her throat and continued as Lucas moved to massage her calves. “Do you think I was a better person in the Villa?”

His hands stopped for a second.

“No,” he said, pressing harder.

She kept silent for a second before continuing. “But I was easier to be around back then.”

“That’s true,” he moved his hands higher up her leg. “But easy is boring.”

“Sometimes, I feel like a fraud,” she whispered barely audible. “That person _he_ fell in love with was never me, but I made him believe it was… I made _everyone_ believe that it was me. I’m a liar, Luc.”

His heart shattered again, and Lucas wondered for a moment how it was even possible, to break what’s been already broken. He moved on the bed and grabbed one of the blankets to wrap it around the girl before he pulled her up and made her look at him. The emeralds of her eyes shone with unshed tears when she met his gaze.

“Sometimes, I think that this body used to belong to someone else. Someone better. And I just took it away from her, and I’m so sorry for it. And I’m fucking sorry for using her body like this.”

She said those words so simple as if reading a shopping list, and for the first time, he didn’t know what to say. He hated that she felt that way, hated that there seemed to be nothing he could say to stop her from blaming herself for everything she was never guilty of.

He felt anger boil in his blood: this is what they’ve done to her, himself included. If only he never brought Blake back, if only he trusted her, if only he didn’t let his own insecurities hurt her… Was she in love with Bobby back then? Probably, yes, just never realized it – or never let herself realize it before she saw him with someone else.

But maybe, if he trusted her, if she saw him at that bloody firepit alone, maybe, she could love _him_ , too?

Lucas’ heart was pounding out of his chest when he gently caught her hand with his and brought it to his lips, whispering into her knuckles as his eyes burned into her.

“I’ve never met anyone better than you,” he squeezed her hand tighter. “I don’t know how, but I’ll make you see yourself with my eyes, I promise.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A


	16. Hold me tight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "If I make it through tonight  
> Tomorrow I'll be fine  
> But you know I'd give my life  
> If I make it through tonight..."
> 
> [Through the Night - Vancouver Sleep Clinic]

“Bobby,” Kat peeked into the wardrobe. “We’re going to be late for our flight.”

She rolled her eyes at how her baker boy threw some more clothes hastily into his suitcase as if they weren’t going away for one week but at least half a year. Bobby looked around, searching for something, and Kat crossed her arms over her chest, leaning against the doorframe tiredly.

“You have four months’ worth of clothes in there,” she nodded at the stuffed suitcase. “If you’re preparing to leave me after this week, just tell me and I’ll send everything over, no need to stuff the entire apartment into…”

She never managed to finish the sentence as the man closed the space between them and pressed his mouth to her lips, cutting her off. For a moment, the world around them just disappeared, leaving the couple in their little bubble that they were trying to keep so hard.

“Let’s go?” Bobby tilted backwards, studying his girl’s face for a moment, and she threw her hands up in defeat.

They took the elevator downstairs, and Kat left the spare set of keys with Albert so he would give it to Lottie when she comes to feed Shadow. The cab was already there, waiting, and they climbed inside, casting one final look at their home.

The redhead’s phone beeped, and she frowned.

“What is it?” Bobby leaned closer to look at the screen over her shoulder.

“My father asks if we need a car,” she typed her response quickly. “Hell to the fucking no.”

She wouldn’t say it out loud but she just knew that this was yet another Trojan horse, just like everything her family ever did. Sending a driver was her parents’ way to start spying on her even before she crosses the threshold of their home, and she wasn’t going to willingly let them do that. 

The girl looked down at her outfit, an oversized sweater and a pair of black jeggings, and sniggered to herself: her mother was a Chanel and diamonds at nine in the morning type of girl, so this look wouldn’t be approved if she ever saw it. Sometimes, when Kat felt particularly petty, she thought of all those times she was forced to wear cheap promotional swimwear on the show and imagined the way her mom’s face twisted in disgust.

The car was moving through the busy streets of London fast, driving them away from the familiar life, from their friends and that fragile stability that they’ve managed to build, and neither of them knew what to say.

Bobby cast a glance at his girlfriend as they finally walked through the terminal, searching for their gate. She looked tired as if she had barely any sleep for the past few months, if not years, and his memory threw a picture at him: a beautiful girl with fire-red hair and shining emerald-green eyes walking out of the villa and moving closer to where he and the four other men stood.

Her smile was so soft and warm, it could light up the entire room. When she laughed, all her body laughed along with her. And when she looked at him, the world just stopped. Back then, she was so bright, like Villa’s personal sun… And then, she wasn’t. Drama after drama, disappointment after disappointment, her smile never touched her eyes anymore, and it seemed like someone turned off the light inside of her heart.

Bobby shook it off and stopped in the middle of the pathway.

“I love you,” he said quietly, catching the girl’s face between his palms. “We’ll get through it, together.”

He kissed her gently, and she sighed into his mouth with relief before the telecom went live repeating their names.

“I hope no Love Island fans here,” the redhead groaned. “I can’t wait until it’s the new season, and everyone forgets about us.”

“Wishful thinking,” Bobby handed their passports to the attendant at the gate. “Have you seen the package Alexis sent us? We’ll have to make some more public appearances before the winter season, and then they’ll want us to be there for the finale…”

They walked down the air corridor and heard the gates close behind their backs: they were the last passengers and now, there was no way back.

“Maybe we’ll just crash somewhere above the ocean,” Kat pulled two travel pillows out of Bobby’s carry-on as they settled in their seats in the last row of a small cabin.

“You love easy exits,” the baker smirked, covering them both with a large blanket. “Up to watch some more of us?”

They watched episode after episode, skipping silly moments filled with laughter, rolling their eyes at operation Kobby, and dreading the last arrival.

… It was the night when Bobby told Kat he loved her for the first time. The night that changed everything for both of them. On-screen Kat was standing barely two feet away from him, her eyes sparkling with a mix of anger and hurt as she spoke, stumbling over her words, breathing heavily.

“…I wished you told me that I’m more important… I wanted you to pick me, just once, I wanted you to take my side!”

Her voice cracked with tears and she swiped them off her cheek angrily, not letting herself slip into a full-blown breakdown. She was so angry the air between them was crackling with electricity, and Bobby involuntarily squeezed the redhead tighter in his arms as they continued watching themselves fight. It was too painful – to see her pain. It was like someone punched a hole in his stomach and put a hand there and grabbed his insights and pulled them out of his body. She was so deeply hurt, and he was the one who did this to her – even though it was all in the past, he still felt the overwhelming guilt washing over his body.

“…I’m here because I don’t understand you anymore! Because I have no fucking idea how to be around you anymore!” on screen, Bobby grabbed Kat’s shoulders, digging his fingers into her skin deeply.

The girl on the screen pushed her hand against his chest, but Bobby’s grip was surprisingly strong, and she was barefooted and smaller. “I can’t watch you and your precious little ray of sunshine anymore, too!”

“What Chelsea even has to do with it?!”

“Because I don’t want to make her or you uncomfortable!” She spat the last word, throwing it back at the man, and Kat on the airplane couldn’t tell if she was up in the air or back at that fucking roof terrace, giving up on the love of her life.

“I don’t want to see you and mister playboy getting off with each other in the middle of the kitchen, too!”

She gasped and her face went red with fury and embarrassment, and Bobby wished he didn’t say those words, once again. It was so strange, to watch himself being so jealous and desperate he felt the need to throw it in her face like that. A pang of guilt went through his heart as he thought of how Lucas would feel when he watches this episode, too.

“… because I didn’t want… It wasn’t… I was…” she couldn’t even finish her thought. “Because I don’t love him, okay! I don’t love him enough to be with him!”

Her words went barely noticed in the heat of the moment but hung heavily in the airplane cabin, sinking in.

“I just can’t do this anymore… this friendship is more than I can bear!”

On-screen Bobby could see her heart broke, her last words were pounding heavily in his head. Kat glanced at her boyfriend who kept holding her in his arms, but she could barely see his face through the haze before her eyes. She wasn’t on the airplane anymore, she was back in the hell on earth that the Villa was for her.

“Are you fucking blind?!”

Bobby’s scream echoed through the entire Villa and returned back to the roof terrace in a small space between them. His fingers dug deeper in her shoulders, leaving bruises on her pale skin. He looked terrified that if he let go of her, she wouldn’t ever come back.

“When you picked everyone over me, Gary, Lucas, and then back to Gary and back to Lucas… How could you not see how I was dying when you kissed me, meaning nothing by it, just because… Fuck, Kat!”

She looked at the screen with so much pain in her eyes, she couldn’t believe how much she’s hurt this poor soul. She looked at them both and felt the hurt they were going through. The girl on the screen winced in pain when the man’s hands almost twisted her shoulders in anger, and Bobby next to her shuddered as if he felt the pain he inflicted, too.

The man on the screen saw red and couldn’t stop, there was no end to his pain, no way out of that hell he brought onto himself – the hell _she_ brought onto him. His hands traveled up to her neck as he pulled the girl closer until their noses almost touched. His blown pupils took the entire space in his eyes, and Kat on the screen could only see those two black holes with fire dancing on the bottoms.

“Just shut up! Are you really… It’s you!” he screamed in the girl’s face. “It’s fucking you, Kat! It was you from day one! I love you, hear me?! I loved you since the moment I saw you, and I hate you for that!”

They froze, unable to move, pinned to their seats with the weight of Bobby’s words screamed into the girl’s face in an uncontrollable rage.

Without saying a word, Bobby finally managed to shake himself into action and got up, motioning Kat to follow him as he took a few steps towards one of the restrooms. He stepped into the tiny space, pulling the girl inside.

He kissed her deeply. Urgently. Strongly. He didn’t need to say anything, there were no words that either of them wanted – or needed – to hear at that moment.

Bobby’s hand slipped down her body until it came to rest on her waist, and his hot breath trembling when her tongue invaded his mouth. Feverish thoughts were running through the girl’s mind when her hand found Bobby’s neck, and Kat’s thumb brushed across his throat drawing a soft moan out of his mouth as her fingers dug dipper into the skin on the back of his neck.

With a low groan, Bobby grabbed at her hips and pulled Kat closer, crushing their bodies together. In response, she brushed her open mouth against his neck, ghosting hot wet breath on the soft skin. She raked her nails up his arm, running her tongue from his neck down to the collarbone, and Bobby let out a soft moan, grasping at her thighs.

Kat’s heart fluttered in her chest at the sight of his widened eyes and parted lips and furiously red cheeks. He swallowed hard when she licked her lips slowly, savoring the taste of his skin. She slowly rolled up her hips, drawing another, this time, louder moan out of his throat.

She didn’t know how much time they had until someone needed a bathroom or they went into turbulent, she only knew she needed Bobby, there and then.

The way her body felt against his left him lost for words as his hand roamed her curves, caressing her skin, and kneading her muscles.

Bobby looked at her like he’s been traveling through the desert and she was a spring of fresh cold water, and she wasn’t able to control herself anymore. She forcefully pushed him against the sink and almost ripped the zip-fly out as she pulled his pants down his legs and wrapped her fingers around his cock, kissing him so hard her lips cracked.

“Kat…” He moaned into her mouth, and his hips bucked into her touch uncontrollably.

He could barely hear anything but the sound of blood rushing through his head when he finally managed to pull her jeans down her thighs. The space around them was too small for the two of them, they barely had any room left, but he just needed to _feel_ her, to mold into her, to become a part of her that she could never get rid of.

Bobby shifted to pull the pants down the girl’s legs until they lay in a puddle around her ankles and turned her around, making her press her chest against the sliding door. He shuffled a little, pushing himself into her thigh, and she gasped a little, feeling his hard length pressed against her skin.

“Please…” Kat whined, her hand reaching behind her to guide him where she needed him the most.

Bobby gasped as her fingers wrapped around his hard cock again, stroking him firmly. There was no space between them, she had to twist her wrist to push him inside of her, arching her back to take him as deep as she could in a dimly lit airplane bathroom.

She jerked her hips towards him demandingly, and he started moving, barely holding his groans. He leaned into her back, his hips moving hastily, and sunk his teeth into her shoulder to muffle out the noises. He knew he wasn’t going to last and slid his hand over her body to circle her clit, making her moan so loud, Bobby knew people outside the restroom could hear.

He pressed his free hand to her mouth, his mouth moving to the back of her neck, kissing and biting, and she combusted all over him, biting into his palm not to cry.

“Fuck,” he groaned as her walls clenched all around him, sending the man into overdrive.

It was something unreal, the way she made him feel was something out of a feverish dream, time after time. Being with her was always like a hurricane, like a tidal wave, crashing over him that Bobby wished could consume him completely.

His eardrums were filled with noise, and he saw the fireworks behind his closed eyelids, and his body arched a few more times towards hers, wishing he could become one with this woman.

She twisted her body, her hands caressing everything she could reach as she guided him back into the tiny restroom until he could finally see clearly again. In silence, she kissed him softly as they somehow cleaned themselves up, and her now dark-green eyes studied his for a second. He knew she was thinking the same as himself, so there was no need to repeat those words aloud.

Whatever they’ve been through, whatever they will only endure – they belonged to each other. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A


	17. We never had enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We’re still on break but this chapter has been sitting in drafts for two months and I figured why not post it.
> 
> Kris, ILYA ❤️

Bobby looked out from the rolled-down window of a yellow cab, sinking in the view of the city where the love of his life was born and raised. She’s never seen so much concrete and glass, it was everywhere as the taxi took them further up the island.

Kat watched him with a little smile playing at the corners of her mouth, breathing the air deeply. Moving out was the right thing to do, this city became too toxic for her, and she needed to cut ties… but every time she came back, her heart fluttered inside the ribcage. There, she was home. All those streets, little stores, and buildings that ended above the clouds were here home, and she couldn’t rip it out of her heart completely.

She missed the cobbled streets of Soho and the coffeeshops of West Village, she missed the galleries in Chelsea and the rooftop bars in Midtown. She missed the Opera season and the Saturdays at Frick, she missed Petrossian and Balthazar and missed every little thing that she had to give up when she left.

They were driving slowly through the unusually empty streets, and the red and yellow leaves were following the car caught in a colorful whirlwind, and the redhead watched them for a while, thinking of all the times she drove in a backseat of a black town car escaping her reality just for a few short hours at a time.

Bobby’s gaze wandered towards the girl next to him. She was smiling softly as if being there was bittersweet, and he fought back an urge to grab her in his arms and chase away whatever thoughts that were buzzing in her mind at that moment.

He only saw _the city_ , as she always called New York, on the telly, never he ever thought that one day he’ll find himself there, with her.

“We’re almost there,” Kat broke the silence between them as the car finally made the last turn pulling over by the entrance of their hotel, and they climbed out of the cab, the sounds of the night city overwhelming them both for a second.

Bobby stood there for a second, soaking in the vibrations that seemed to bring life to the girl’s face, turning her cheeks slightly pink and making her body tremble with excitement almost involuntarily, even after an eight-hour flight. They went inside, submerging into the restrained opulence of the interior

“We have a Suite booked,” Kat gave her driver’s license to the desk attendant while Bobby flopped on one of the plush chairs in the lobby.

Nervously, she caught her bottom lip between her teeth. There was no way back, they were there, in the city that she still called her home, even if inside of her head only. She kept telling everyone that it was in the past, that she was never going to move back… but a small part of her always held to the strange comfort of knowing that she had that option, no matter how much she kept rejecting it.

If Bobby hated the city, there would be no going back, that volume of her life would be closed and put away, onto the farthest bookshelf where no one touches it again.

She shrugged it off, barely containing a yawn as they grabbed their bags refusing help, and went towards the elevator. She needed a moment alone with her baker and couldn’t wait until they were inside their suite, pressing him into the mirrored wall the moment the elevator doors closed behind them and she pressed the card to the reader and pressed the button of their floor.

Bobby’s surprised gasp turned into a ragged moan when her body crashed into his, and her mouth took claim of his, kissing him deeply, almost painfully. His hands clenched immediately in her sides, fingers digging into the soft skin through the fabric of her sweater.

The flight, numerous glasses of champagne to calm down their thought, the long wait at the airport in tense silence, and the taxi drive – it was all too long, with too many people around them, with too little time to touch her, to make sure she was still.

After that episode, neither of them could continue watching the show, neither could even find the words to speak. Neither of them _needed_ words, but both of them wished they still had them. He wished he had the words to say that all those things he screamed at her months ago didn’t matter. They didn’t matter back then and surely had no weight now.

The elevator stopped, and they pulled apart, panting, eyes wild and sparkling in the dim artificial light. They moved along the light-blue walls of the hallway until they reached their door, and Bobby impatiently guided Kat’s hands to press the keycard to the reader.

They stumbled inside, pushing their bags out of the way, their arms wrapped tightly around each other as their bodies said everything that their lips couldn’t, until they couldn’t breathe anymore, until they couldn’t tell where one ended and the other began.

Bobby pulled Kat closer, his hands wrapping around her protectively, and sighed into the back of her neck contently, falling into a peaceful sleep. She lay next to him, her fingers tracing patterns over the skin of his toned arms.

She couldn’t sleep, her mind empty but at the same time full to the brim. Bobby’s breath steadied as he fell deeper into sleep, his arms relaxing but still holding her tight as if even in his dream, he didn’t want to let go of her. Kat carefully slipped out of his embrace and lowered her head to kiss his beautiful face now glowing in the lights of the night city falling onto his face through the open curtains on the panoramic bay windows.

Quietly, she left the bedroom and closed the door behind herself, walking barefoot across the leaving room back the forgotten suitcases. She unzipped hers and pulled out Bobby’s shirt, the one he once gave her back in the Villa and that she pronounced her when the baker found it on her half of the wardrobe.

She threw it on and took the phone out of her purse, squinting as the screen went on too brightly for the dimly lit room. It was barely seven in the morning back home, and she froze in uncertainty, going through her messages. Lottie texted her with a picture of Shadow sitting on the dining table, absolutely pleased with herself and the witch, and Kat sent her a quick text knowing it won’t wake her up and frowned.

Even if he was up on a Saturday morning, was it the greatest time to talk to anyone?

Her phone went alive in her hand, vibrating with a message.

**Lucas: you up?**

She smirked involuntarily, the decision was made for her, and pressed ‘call’.

“Hey,” she always found his ruffled after the sleep hair almost adorable, even though she hated it. “Why aren’t you sleeping in?”

Lucas yawned harrowingly and narrowed his eyes at the girl. “Because my best friend took a flight across the ocean and never bothered texting that she didn’t end up in the middle of it.”

Involuntarily, Kat chuckled, watching the man as he slowly made his way to the kitchen, put the phone onto the island, propping it against something, and put the kettle on. She followed his movements with her eyes, and just the familiarity of his hands making coffee in his kitchen brought her some strange peace.

She pulled the velvet- upholstered armchair closer to the window and nuzzled into it, stretching her legs so her feet rested against the glass, and leaned her head against the back of the chair.

It was comforting, not to talk, just be in the presence of someone who was just there, busy with his morning routine, it took her mind off of things, lulling the girl into sleep until her eyes fell close and the phone slipped out of her fingers.

She was dreaming of warm rays of sun playing in her hair, and soft whisper of water, and a floating gazebo with two people, dancing together, their slow movements falling in rhythm with the waves, flowing around. Two figures kept moving gently, disconnected from the entire world, together, in the middle of a sea, only for each other.

“Kat,” Bobby’s voice snuck through her haze, pulling her out of the dream softly as his hand caressed her cheek.

She was on the verge of waking up, but her mind was still far away from the hotel suite, and she felt two arms wrap around her, lifting her off the chair and carrying her carefully into the bed. The first glimmers of sunrise colored the grey sky pale-yellow when Bobby lay down next to his girl, covering them both with a duvet, listening to the sounds of the waking city.

He watched her sleep, her face relaxed and content, and wondered what she was dreaming of. These days, seeing her like that was a rare sight, and he fought back his own tiredness to spend as much time as he could, seeing her beautiful features not distorted with a frown or overflowing sadness splashing in her eyes.

His own thoughts were slow and lazy, flowing in his mind without popping up to the surface where he could catch them. His fingers gently drew patterns on her shoulder, and Bobby lost track of time, just lying there next to her, listening to her quiet breathing, drifting in a haze of his own.

She turned in her sleep, and a pair of emerald-green eyes caught Bobby’s gaze.

“Morning, Mr. Goldberg,” the girl smiled softly, resting her head on her hand, and the baker rolled his eyes.

“As if you don’t do that.”

“I do it so often it doesn’t count,” Kat ran her fingers over the man’s face. “Why are you up so early?”

He shuffled closer and kissed her instead of an answer.

“I miss the chocolate,” he noted thoughtfully, remembering their time in the Villa when kissing her tasted like drinking a chocolate chip mint milkshake.

His hand traced down her arm, pushing the duvet aside, and his touch made her skin prickle with goosebumps. Their eyes locked, and Kat moved silently forward, closing the space between them with a long, drawn-out kiss that lasted longer than eternity. With his eyes closed, Bobby moved to throw her leg over his hips, erasing the space between them, moaning quietly as her hand snaked between their bodies, taking hold of him.

A loud ring coming from another room made them both growl.

“It’s yours,” Bobby breathed out, tugging her bottom lip with his teeth, his hands gripping her tighter.

“I should get it,” her fingers stroked his length, making his hips jerk into her touch.

“Yeah,” he dragged his mouth to her ear, his hot breath burning on her skin, and finally released her from his grasp.

On shaking legs, Kat climbed out of the bed and walked towards the living room, Bobby’s shirt all wrinkled and falling off her shoulder. He stared after her, his wild as he took in the sight of her long perfect legs, her tangled hair cascading down her back, and the way she looked at him over her shoulder before disappearing in the other room.

She found her phone on the floor next to the chair and bent over to pick it up, feeling the touch of Bobby’s hands squeezing her hips. He pulled her roughly into him, making her gasp at the sudden force, and pressed himself into her.

“Don’t make them wait,” he whispered raspily and pushed his knee between her thighs, making her spread her legs wider.

She looked at the screen: it was her father’s work number.

“Yes,” she managed to say it almost calmly as Bobby’s fingers brushed a rough stripe against her before pushing the girl towards the window.

“Katherine?” her father’s assistance sounded just as annoying as she remembered.

“Mhm,” she pressed the phone to her ear with one hand, her other palm pressed into the glass.

A jolt of pain mixed with pleasure went through her body when Bobby’s hand made her arch her back, and he entered her sharply, filling her completely.

Her eyes rolled back, and she almost let the phone slip out of her hand, barely registering what the woman was telling her. He gave her about a second to adjust and started moving, his fingers gripping her hips almost frenziedly as if he was so angry with her couldn’t stand the thought of letting her go.

She pressed herself harder against the glass, barely holding back moans of pleasure rushing out her throat.

“… and the meet him there,” the voice in the phone went on, but she missed half of what the woman said.

Bobby’s rough movements, the coldness of the glass mixed with the hot air inside the room, and the busy city spread under her feet, everything blended together in a whirlwind of feelings, carrying her away fast.

“Where… meet?’ she almost whined when Bobby’s hand snaked around her to circle her clit as his thrusts became more frantic.

“At the House,” the assistant repeated. “Are you alright, miss?”

She couldn’t answer, her phone finally finding its way to the floor as her entire body arched into a tight bow.

“Bobby,” she half-moaned half-cried, and it was the last straw for him.

With a low feral groan, he came deep inside of her, burying his face in her hair, and his pleasure sent her over the edge, too, her eyes almost falling close but catching one of the passersby looking up. She couldn’t make out their face and wasn’t sure if it was a man or a woman – but she held that figure with her heart as her body was shuddering in pleasure.

She turned to face Bobby and kissed a tiny frown off his face.

“Sorry,” he squatted to pick up her phone from the carpet. “It wasn’t too mature.”

“I think,” she ran her finger along his jawline. “It was NC-21… at least, eighteen plus.”

The baker chuckled, pulling the girl closer.

“You eejit,” he whispered tenderly, stroking a strand of hair out of her face. “Who was it anyway?”

“Dad’s secretary,” she ruffled Bobby’s hair. “He wants to have lunch with us today.”

“Oh?”

Bobby tried to make his voice sound nonchalantly but almost choked on the sudden nervous lump in his throat. Kat gave him a gentle smile and a kiss on the lips, knowing how uneasy it would be for him to meet her parents, her mother especially. After all the things they said to him, to her, after they literally sent the guy she was in love with to get together with her just so she wouldn’t end up with Bobby… She couldn’t imagine what Bobby must’ve felt back then when Jared told the entire Villa that her family was against him.

Bobby’s friends hated her, but it was different – she never had self-esteem issues the way Bobby did, she never thought she wasn’t good enough. And he… it took him a lot of time and work to finally believe he was worth everything, the entire world.

“It’s gonna be okay,” she whispered.

“I know,” he stroked her face gently. “Because you’ll be there. If you’re there, I wouldn’t rather be anywhere else.”

If those words were said but anyone else, she would’ve said it was just a stupid line, but not for Bobby. His silly jokes and ridiculous pick-up lines that he threw all over her in their first weeks in Villa were never _just_ words, and she knew it even back then when she was lying to herself that whatever it was between the two of them was just friendship.

She kept going back to their summer in Spain as they finally moved to get dressed and ready for the day, not even sure why she started thinking so much about those six weeks.

With each passing day, she loved him even more, she loved him to the point she couldn’t find a single cell in her body that wasn’t filled with this love, that hadn’t ‘Bobby’ written all over it. Even when she felt a million miles away, he connected her to reality, he kept her on earth when she could barely see where she was going, he was there, every single time she needed him, he was always there.

She looked into the large bathroom mirror, meeting the gaze of large green eyes that seemed unfamiliar.

She couldn’t get the memory of that fight out of her head now that she was reminded of it. When she said ‘I love you’ during the last recoupling, everything else just disappeared. All the pain and fears, all the uncertainty, everything that kept them apart was gone, and up until now, it seemed that it was gone forever.

Kat sat on the wide vanity and started applying makeup, carefully hiding herself behind the perfect mask. She hid how pale her skin was and how deep and dark the circles under her eyes lay, hid her bitten lips, and stopped to trace the bite mark in the crook of her neck. Did she even care?

She covered the mark, knowing that her parents didn’t need even more reasons for resentment towards Bobby. It was enough for her to know that he _gave_ it to her, her sweet, silly baker boy that went bestial with her.

“Wow,” Bobby whistled when she showed up in the bedroom doors, finally ready. “I keep forgetting to wear sunglasses when you’re around, Red.”

He barely called her that since they left the Villa as if that pet name belonged to someone who left there, but when he did, it brought back the memories of the time when they were so free as if they had the entire world before them and couldn’t be more carefree.

“Don’t look too bad yourself, _Booby_ ,” she teased, referring to her constant typos in texts, and got closer.

In black pants, white button-up, and a dark-grey coat, he looked more handsome than any model, any actor, anyone else on the planet… but he didn’t look Bobby, and a tiny part of her reminded Kat that he didn’t look like himself because of her.

He read her look immediately, so easy as if he was reading written words instead of her eyes.

“You know what I can’t wait to do?” he said quietly, taking hold of her chin to make her focus on him.

“What?”

His eyes sparkled mischievously. “Take your guess.”

Kat rolled her eyes.

“You’re either fifteen or a robot,” she remarked, her face losing the sad, guilty expression.

“Neither,” Bobby sighed in relief as he managed to take her mind off her thoughts. “It’s all you.”

He wished he could do it for longer than just a few minutes at a time, but he was willing to try and try and try some more until he no longer exists. He followed her out of the hotel and down one of the busy streets to one of her favorite breakfast places.

“Are we trying to walk through the entire city?” the man whined about half an hour later, and she almost laughed.

“Everyone walks in New York,” her eyes lit up as he said those words, tugging at his hand. “But we’re nearly there, crybaby.”

He barely ever saw her walk the streets of London, and it was somewhat strange, watch her almost dance across one of the avenues – she almost looked like on the day they met. Those same light, graceful footsteps filled with air, the same small smile playing on her lips, soft glimmer in her eyes – it was the girl he fell for the second he saw her.

He wrapped his arms around her waist and picked her up, spinning in the air, and her laugh filled the space around them, washing his heart with a warm wave. He kissed her, in the middle of the street, and all the noises disappeared. There were just the two of them like it was always supposed to be,

“I love you,” he whispered into her lips before pulling slightly back. “Now, feed me.”

Still laughing, she dragged him for a few more blocks before they finally reached their point of destination.

“Best croissants in the city,” Kat pulled the first door and they stepped into a small waiting area. “It’s still early enough so they should have a table for us.”

“If I walked forty minutes, and they make me wait…” Bobby stumbled into the girl’s back when she suddenly froze, her hand still on the door handle. “What is it?”

He followed her gaze, and his stomach tightened into a knot.

Kat’s eyes were glued to the man before her. His lips stretched into a smirk as he ran his fingers through his dark hair, and his blue eyes sparkled predatorily.

“Katherine,” he bowed slightly, and Bobby couldn’t tell if it was mockingly or not.

“Jared,” she breathed out as all the memories came back crushing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like this story, leave comments and kudos, it means the world ♥️
> 
> Playlist: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0NX46VU4kc1umngFpZDqLb?si=hNfPDzB0SJ2helBwHy214A


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